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[Poll]
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Best kind of child care
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| A center |
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| An in home day care |
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| Live in nanny |
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| Live out nanny |
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| Relative in your own home |
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| Relative in their home |
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| part time babysitter |
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| church day care/preschool |
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| other |
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| trading with friends whose schedule is different |
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Total Votes : 64
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(last vote on : 4/22/2008 9:06:20 PM)
(Poll will run till: -- )
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Best kind of child care - 4/10/2008 6:36:13 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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From: California
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For those that need to utilize child care, which do you think would be, or has been the best option for your child(ren)? While SAHMs are welcome to participate in this thread, this is NOT a thread for debating about staying home or working, or for one side to attack another. It is simply a poll for when care for your child is needed, for WHATEVER reason, a job or otherwise, what you think would, or has worked best for your child.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/10/2008 6:45:51 PM
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paulsbride
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I am a SAHM, so I haven't had to face this decision. However I would opt for either a live-out nanny or a family member, either in their home or my home.
The nanny or family member would be well paid (and if the family member didn't want payment they would be gifted with gift cards for things that interest them that they don't normally spend money on.)
My sister is actually a nanny and it would be sweet to have her watch my kids if I were in the position to need someone ... when hubby and I went to Jamaica for a week she was the only person I knew I'd be comfortable leaving my son with, and was more than happy to pay for her ticket down here and for all her expenses while she was down here.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/10/2008 6:51:18 PM
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karlie
Posts: 16666
Joined: 4/10/2005
From: Central California
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If I absolutely had to have childcare, my first choice would be be to hire someone I trusted, preferably a family member, to come into my home during my working hours. My daughter was a nanny for a family for about a year, and the kids and parents loved her. The parents loved it because they knew us personally, and knew my daughter's values, and the kids could stay in their own home and environment and not be exposed to illness, bad habits, ect in a traditional daycare. They also got her undivided attention and it worked well for them.
I personally would do my best not to have them in traditional day care, either in someone's home, or a center. There are usually too many kids and it's not an environment I would want my infant or toddler in. It would be of vital importance to me that my child spend that time with someone they really knew and trusted, and could feel genuine love from.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/10/2008 7:10:37 PM
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isaacsmom
Posts: 1674
Joined: 12/2/2005
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I voted in-home daycare or relative. For me, it would really depend on the child and the individual or center giving the care.
I worked for the first 6 months after my son was born. Some days I took him to work with me and some days I took him to a lady I went to church with who I highly trusted and knew well. She is a homeschool mom (her kids were high-school/college age at the time) and midwife and genuinely loved my baby. I never worried about my son when he was there.
If I absolutely had to go back to work, ideally my first choice would be a relative who I trusted and I knew would connect with and love my child. That's most important to me. If that option wasn't available, I would not have a problem with my older son going to a preschool with a Christian atmosphere and good curriculum and good care. I would be very, very choosy. I think it would really depend on the caregiver/facility and the child. Obviously I couldn't choose an individual who I didn't know well or trust just because they are an individual and not a daycare.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/10/2008 8:31:07 PM
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Georgia-Peach
Posts: 1973
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From: Georgia on my mind
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I am a SAHM, but if our situation was different it would depend on the age of the child as to what type of child care we chose. Infant to 3 years old it would be private care whether it was a relative or live out nanny. At age 3 I would do preschool at a private school as the choice of child care.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/10/2008 11:33:12 PM
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Kath
Posts: 16217
Joined: 2/28/2005
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moving from Womens only to Parenting. Dads put children in day care too and have opinions.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 12:06:36 AM
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1love1God1way
Posts: 1985
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I went to a trusted friend of the family's home for many years when I was younger.
As I grew older, I just got thrown into whoever would take me for a couple years. One year was pretty disastrous, but otherwise, it worked.
The important thing was, when I got picked up, and my dad got home from work. . . my parents raised me then. They spent time with me. Quality time. It was not time wasted.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 8:25:09 AM
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LaurainAL
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My husband and I chose a daycare center for the following reasons:
1. They are regulated by the state
2. I have seen too many segments on t.v. where a nanny with good references abused the children. At a center you have more than one person watching
3. I think a center is more dependable. If the nanny gets sick or needs a day off for whatever reason and gives you short notice, then what do you do?
4. We like that our kids have interaction with other children their age
I pay an arm and a leg for our pre-school but I am trusting them with my children. I don't want cheap care.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 8:41:57 AM
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Ellie-Mae
Posts: 4234
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From: The EMPIRE state!
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I think the best child care is going to be different from family to family.
We have my mother and my Husband's aunt living with us so I guess you could call it live in daycare by relatives.
Laurain, Your points are very good. However, as someone who has worked at a daycare I would caution people to know what the guidlines are and be sure that they are really being followed. The day care that I was working at had a good reputation in the community, BUT I had 18 children that were 2-3 years old by myself, the director made boys share toilets at three at a time, She told the kids never to use more than one square of toilet paper at a time, the waterfountains (every room was required to have one) in the rooms didn't work, and many other things were going on. After they took out one of their floors, they even had asbestos stored in open containers covered with carpet on one of the playgrounds.
Of course not all day cares are like that, but this one had a good reputation. My point is to know the laws, and check the premises routinely (I don't think one parent ever saw the containers that their kids were playing around).
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 8:51:35 AM
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LaurainAL
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We periodically make surprise visits and we know what goes on at our daycare. DH's office is close by so he can easily pop in. Also, some of the teachers go to our church and we trust them. I am sure there are some really awful daycares out there, but I think we have a pretty good one.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 8:58:26 AM
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earthless
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Am I reading the poll question wrong? Where is option for a stay at home mom or dad?
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 9:01:26 AM
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artemis
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quote:
ORIGINAL: earthless
Am I reading the poll question wrong? Where is option for a stay at home mom or dad?
Read the OP.
The best kind of child care is the one that works best for you and your child.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 9:27:16 AM
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PrincessDonna
Posts: 10717
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Cow country, Upstate NY
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When I had a child in daycare, I used a small home daycare run by someone we already knew. She had only one of her own kids still at home and took in 5-6 kids. I loved her and trusted her completely.
If I need someone to take my kids occasionally now, I usually ask a friend to watch them. I also watch those friends' kids as needed.
If I needed full time or regular part time care now, I would much prefer a relative (my mom or sister), either in my home or in theirs. Thankfully, I don't need that at this time, and I have provided a VERY small home daycare when someone calls looking for it. I only take one full time kid at a time, and only a couple part time.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 10:27:54 AM
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SweetLittleErin
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Our child is not born yet, but we have opted (at this point) for a center. The reason being, we have a couple of really nice centers in our area. We are already familiar with them and have heard good things. The one we are choosing (most likely) is at the school our children will attend, they have structured lessons and when the kids get older - near kindergarten age they go over to the kindergarten for storytime and tours and meet the teachers, etc. It makes the transition to school very easy, and as well most of their daycare playmates would also be their kindergarten mates. We also like the fact that they are well regulated.
I dont know anyone personally who does in home care and in home care would make me nervous if I was not acquainted with the person doing it. Some of the folks I'm aware of who do do in home care I dont exactly trust nor like the environment (smokers, etc). I'm not saying any of ya'll who do in home care are bad (if I was in your area I'd likely choose you!!) but in this area there are many people who 'dont want to work' or are receiving disability payments so they "want to watch kids in their home" and basically they just let them watch tv all day.
As far as family, for us it works best not to use family. We dont feel comfortable with my mother and hubbys mother has not problem being the "backup" but does not want to babysit 5 days a week.
But I agree, the best choice for childcare is what works best for the family in their given situation. Sometimes thats SAHM/D, sometimes its family, sometimes its something completely different. No choice one way or the other makes for bad parents.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 10:50:08 AM
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OneOfHisJewels
Posts: 1571
Joined: 8/9/2007
From: California
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Ellie-Mae
I think the best child care is going to be different from family to family.
We have my mother and my Husband's aunt living with us so I guess you could call it live in daycare by relatives.
Laurain, Your points are very good. However, as someone who has worked at a daycare I would caution people to know what the guidlines are and be sure that they are really being followed. The day care that I was working at had a good reputation in the community, BUT I had 18 children that were 2-3 years old by myself, the director made boys share toilets at three at a time, She told the kids never to use more than one square of toilet paper at a time, the waterfountains (every room was required to have one) in the rooms didn't work, and many other things were going on. After they took out one of their floors, they even had asbestos stored in open containers covered with carpet on one of the playgrounds.
Of course not all day cares are like that, but this one had a good reputation. My point is to know the laws, and check the premises routinely (I don't think one parent ever saw the containers that their kids were playing around)
Although the minute details are different, sounds like a day care that I worked at. A former coworker of mine moved on to a Lutheran day care that is very good, and nothing like that.
< Message edited by OneOfHisJewels -- 4/11/2008 10:58:05 AM >
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 11:09:22 AM
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peculiar_lady2
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quote:
ORIGINAL: earthless
Am I reading the poll question wrong? Where is option for a stay at home mom or dad?
she didn't add that because it's not really child care, it's called parenting. Any time a parent is home (whether that be every day or what) they are parenting, not providing child care for their own kids.
for us, if we need our kids to be watched by someone (I stay home, so it's not that often), we opt for my mom above anyone else. However we don't live around her, so that's not very often at all. Sometimes in the different places we have lived we had trusted friends that we could switch off childcare with, however here we haven't found anyone...much less that we would trust our kids with (this is seeming to post a problem in the next few months because we can't take our kids to the hospital with us when this baby is born...so we have to find someone, but have no one so far). I don't think we would ever personally choose to use a child care facility....we have a few times in the past (on post childcare center) a few times (like when we had to do pre-deployment paperwork and the kids couldn't be there but all our friends had to be there too), and we were not that impressed with the kids attitudes following those types of situations. Obviously part of that could have been that they weren't used to it, but still....I would rather not have to deal with that. I prefer a more personal touch.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 11:17:09 AM
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Mrs.Wifey
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When I was working my MIL cared for DD in her home and because she wouldn't accept payment we frequently gifted her with her favorite things(lotions, chocolate, pedicures).
This summer I will be taking some biology classes at the community college and we'll either use MIL again or hire an Au Pair. If we go with an Au Pair then we will of course install the usual Nanny Cams, etc... for monitoring.
I prefer an Au Pair over a center for a majority of reasons, but mostly because Gabby can get one-on-one care and continue with activities we have already paid for through the summer.
< Message edited by Mrs.Wifey -- 4/11/2008 11:24:24 AM >
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 12:11:35 PM
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HenriettasCat
Posts: 221
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My boys have both gone to a nursery/preschool. It is small and in an old victorian house - set up more like a home which is one of the reasons why we liked it. I cannot emphasise enough that all nursery settings are different and they have to be judged on there own merit.
I would not use our parents to care for our children on a regular basis (even if they lived nearby) for a number of reasons. Firstly they are old and don't have the energy to be running after small children for long periods. Its a lot to ask of them. My parents and I disagree on many points raising children and I could see it becoming a source of conflict. I just want them to enjoy their grandchildren and leave the rest to me.
Within the nursery my children attend they have a very low staff turnover so there is consistency of care - my 5 year old still goes for a day or so in the holidays to 5-10's club and therefore he still gets to see the faces he knew from when he was 8 months old. Both of my children are very confident and sociable and I think that nursery has helped them in this way. They have had opportunities to do things I would never be able (or want) to do with them at home in terms of messy play, team games etc. I find that the peer environment helps them learn because children learn from one another. There are things my children will do with their friends at nursery that there is no way they would do at home (like eat thier vegetables!). The premises are only 2 minutes from where I work and therefore I could go and bf a couple of times a day when they were little (it was quicker than expressing).
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 12:47:46 PM
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3cappuccinosmom
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Should disaster strike, first choice would be immediate family. If dh died or incapacitated (God forbid!) we would probably sell out our properties, move in with my parents, and I'd take a nightshift so I could be home with the kids during the day.
Second choice would be a SAHM who was already a friend and who's values and behavior I trusted completely.
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 1:33:54 PM
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29redballoons
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I was wondering where you were...nice to see ya!!!!!!
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RE: Best kind of child care - 4/11/2008 1:39:00 PM
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shadowspring
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Posting blind:
I think the most important thing- after competency of course- is continuity in your child care arrangements.
Any home- your or providers- is better than daycare in most cases. (Fewer kids, no turnover of employees.) And any loving, safe, nurturing adult is good- related or not.
The most important thing to children is stability, so find a good situation and stick with it, if you at all possibly can.
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I didn't think of that because I was thinking of my thread as a spinoff from the Women who work outside the home support thread. But it does make more sense here, now that I think about it. Thank you. I will enjoy seeing what the dads think, too.
