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Hearing Potty mouth at football games: what to do? - 9/19/2008 11:49:01 AM
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SeminoleTom
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Hi everyone,
Last week my nephew and I went to a football game...we are enjoying ourselves than a bunch of students show up in front of us and almost every other word was "F*** this" and "F*** that". My nephew is 11 years old and one other piece of info: my son is 5 and I plan on taking him to games later this year or next year.
Anyway, I don't think either one hearing this language is appropriate. However, what am I to do? Scold the block of people that sit in our area-- telling them please refrain from the laguage? I think that is an option but.... it's a sporting event he's going to hear this language. It's sad but true. If I told everyone that curses at football game to please tone it down I could spend the entire game doing that instead of watching the game.
Another option is don't go to the games. I thoroughly don't think this is a good idea. Why? because we can not isolate our Christian children forever. One could hear this language walking into the grocery store.... I don't believe Christians should remove ourselves from the world (if the 'fun' is good and wholesome...which I think athletic events are).
So the other day...I kind of froze. I heard the language and didn't say anything to the offender...we were leaving anyway. Next time I need to prepare myself for this as it will surely happen again. What would you do? What would you tell your kids? Would you talk to them before the game? Just to warn them.....
Finally, I'm not saying I'm perfect. I've dropped some bad words in my time...I'm human. But I try hardest not to do it around children.
Thanks for any input and advice.
[Edited title to try to make it clickable from the main folder page...]
< Message edited by ta_mosquito -- 9/20/2008 10:27:02 AM >
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/19/2008 11:53:15 AM
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doinkdom
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I'd just lean forward and ask one of them if they could please tone it down just a little because you have little kids with you. I wouldn't get into a big discussion, but I would request they refrain or keep it quieter.
I don't think that's too much to ask.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/19/2008 12:03:38 PM
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Focusing
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A lot of people are busy having their "fun" and don't even consider that little ears are around. In the past, I have leaned forward and requested very quietly if they could please be careful because my son was right behind them. I was careful not to use a judgmental or scolding (or snippy) tone, and they were very considerate ... even telling their friends themselves "Hey! There are kids around, watch what you say."
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Instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend. That would be giving as the angels give.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/19/2008 12:14:20 PM
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TorchHeart
Posts: 1979
Joined: 6/4/2008
From: One of the coldest places on Earth
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quote:
ORIGINAL: doinkdom
I'd just lean forward and ask one of them if they could please tone it down just a little because you have little kids with you. I wouldn't get into a big discussion, but I would request they refrain or keep it quieter.
I don't think that's too much to ask.
Oh yeah. That's not going over-board. Most people will understand what you're asking of them, too, and try to hold it down. Its one thing if they're in a bar with a bunch of adults and swearing about the game they're watching. At a public sporting event, though, you're going to see kids. They should be able to recognize that and control their swearing.
If they don't, and its still bothering you, either move to different seats (assuming the game is general admission) or speak to one of the ushers. I'm definitely no saint when it comes to swearing, but they're rude behavior shouldn't interfere with your nephew's or son's enjoyment of the game.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/20/2008 11:20:36 AM
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iamjc-s
Posts: 335
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Especially if above options fail.
1: Have your kid or nephew go ask them what the word means.
2: Bring a Walkmann w/radio station of game or Shortwave radio
for your kid or nephew to listen to instead.
3: Start quoting Bible verses louder than they are cussing, each time they start cussing.
#1 or #3 might accually make a permanent difference in 1 or more of them.
Remember: With God ALL things are possible.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/20/2008 11:31:54 AM
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rcjames
Posts: 5782
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From: Oklahoma
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quote:
ORIGINAL: doinkdom
I'd just lean forward and ask one of them if they could please tone it down just a little because you have little kids with you. I wouldn't get into a big discussion, but I would request they refrain or keep it quieter.
I don't think that's too much to ask.
Good advice, and if that did not work, I would find a school official to handle the situation. Football games are considered school activities and the same rules apply there for students as in the school.
Thanks
RC
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Read the first chapter of my latest book here;
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/20/2008 2:55:36 PM
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colliefan
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At 'Canes games, the front office does its best to make the games "family friendly" and does not tolerate rude of obnoxious behavior.
The ushers will show individuals the door if they fail to abide by those guidelines.
So, ask individuals to tone down the langauge. If they fail to do so, and the team doesn't have fan behavior guidelines, use the rude behavior as an object lesson for your children,
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/20/2008 3:17:16 PM
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agapetos
Posts: 5563
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: This side of the lil duck pond!
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quote:
I'd just lean forward and ask one of them if they could please tone it down just a little because you have little kids with you. I wouldn't get into a big discussion, but I would request they refrain or keep it quieter.
I don't think that's too much to ask. Great post!
I think it's worth talking to your nephew and son too. Explain to them that there are some people who use bad language. Point out that it is not right to judge people who use bad language based on it, but explain they have different standards to your family. Make it clear that you do not expect them to use that language themselves.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/20/2008 4:24:29 PM
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ekserekseez
Posts: 693
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If it's a high school or lower game, you could ask an official to have them tone down their talk.
Wouldn't work at a Big Ten game, where you have 50 to 100 thousand people all using those words (me among them, but I DO try to tone it down around very small kids0L>
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/20/2008 6:45:48 PM
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iluvatar
Posts: 2031
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: online
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iamjc-s
Especially if above options fail.
1: Have your kid or nephew go ask them what the word means.
2: Bring a Walkmann w/radio station of game or Shortwave radio
for your kid or nephew to listen to instead.
3: Start quoting Bible verses louder than they are cussing, each time they start cussing.
#1 or #3 might accually make a permanent difference in 1 or more of them.
The only permanent difference that #1 and #3 would make is cementing any idea these people had that Christians are wackos. Politely, discretely, non-condescendingly asking them to keep it down around the kids is the best course of action. (remember, just because you're Christian, you aren't better than they are and your sins aren't less serious - they may just be less obvious to outsiders. self-righteousness is not the way to win others to Christ)
I work with a bunch of guys who have some colorful language (to put it mildly) and I know of at least one occassion where our group was asked by a waitress to tone it down because although it was a fairly adult establishment, there were some families around. The request was well-received and respected, and the response genuinely apologetic. Had tactics 1 or 3 been tried, I guarantee the response would not have been favorable.
-Dan.
_____________________________
Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/20/2008 10:16:16 PM
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BillBaileyBFAFan
Posts: 341
Joined: 6/5/2008
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I think a good talk with your nephew and son about how some people have no respect and use these people as examples for what kind of people they don't want to be would be a good idea.
I agree that scolding or threats don't work , it only inflames the situation.
I would really love to see sporting facilities implement family seating areas, where alcohol is not served and where people can take their kids and enjoy a game or race without the children being verbally beaten.
A race track that is unfortunately closed now, (due to the land being bought by a company) used to have a "beer garden". That was an isolated area of bleachers on the back side of the racetrack. If you wanted to drink, this was the only area. I liked this. I think this was very similar to what I would call family seating. You had language occasionlly, but no alcohol in the main grandstand.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/21/2008 6:33:21 PM
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TrustingGod
Posts: 162
Joined: 6/19/2008
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Unfortunately too many kids (and adults) don't realize how offensive their language is. And it has become such a regular part of their language, they don't "hear" themselves saying it.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/22/2008 9:19:37 AM
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SeminoleTom
Posts: 38
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iamjc-s
Especially if above options fail.
1: Have your kid or nephew go ask them what the word means.
2: Bring a Walkmann w/radio station of game or Shortwave radio
for your kid or nephew to listen to instead.
3: Start quoting Bible verses louder than they are cussing, each time they start cussing.
#1 or #3 might accually make a permanent difference in 1 or more of them.
Remember: With God ALL things are possible.
Thanks for the reply but I've very troubled by #3. I don't think that is a good idea. If anything, it could insight a riot....
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/22/2008 9:22:29 AM
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SeminoleTom
Posts: 38
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iluvatar
quote:
ORIGINAL: iamjc-s
Especially if above options fail.
1: Have your kid or nephew go ask them what the word means.
2: Bring a Walkmann w/radio station of game or Shortwave radio
for your kid or nephew to listen to instead.
3: Start quoting Bible verses louder than they are cussing, each time they start cussing.
#1 or #3 might accually make a permanent difference in 1 or more of them.
The only permanent difference that #1 and #3 would make is cementing any idea these people had that Christians are wackos. Politely, discretely, non-condescendingly asking them to keep it down around the kids is the best course of action. (remember, just because you're Christian, you aren't better than they are and your sins aren't less serious - they may just be less obvious to outsiders. self-righteousness is not the way to win others to Christ)
I work with a bunch of guys who have some colorful language (to put it mildly) and I know of at least one occassion where our group was asked by a waitress to tone it down because although it was a fairly adult establishment, there were some families around. The request was well-received and respected, and the response genuinely apologetic. Had tactics 1 or 3 been tried, I guarantee the response would not have been favorable.
-Dan.
iluvatar,
I see your posts from time to time and you always stick out to me. Are you Christian? I don't mean to hijack my own thread but your posts always seem thought provoking/ different than the 'mainstream'. Thanks-- looking forward to your reply.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/22/2008 9:36:27 AM
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iluvatar
Posts: 2031
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: online
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quote:
ORIGINAL: SeminoleTom
I see your posts from time to time and you always stick out to me. Are you Christian? I don't mean to hijack my own thread but your posts always seem thought provoking/ different than the 'mainstream'. Thanks-- looking forward to your reply.
Yep, born-again. I just happen to spend a lot of time working in "the world" exposed to... a variety of things. I see that many of the "mainstream" Christian ideas that get tossed around don't really come from wisdom or experience, but from being insulated and isolated from what's really going on in society and just listening to what some talking head tells you.
IMO, the best thing for these kids would be to learn how to be around this language, but to not be affected by it and to not start using it themselves. That's something they can take with them into adulthood that could prove valuable in a number of ways.
Whether now (ages 5 & 11) is the proper time or a football game a proper place is another matter.
_____________________________
Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/22/2008 9:52:14 AM
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TorchHeart
Posts: 1979
Joined: 6/4/2008
From: One of the coldest places on Earth
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: BillBaileyBFAFan
I think a good talk with your nephew and son about how some people have no respect and use these people as examples for what kind of people they don't want to be would be a good idea.
I agree that scolding or threats don't work , it only inflames the situation.
I would really love to see sporting facilities implement family seating areas, where alcohol is not served and where people can take their kids and enjoy a game or race without the children being verbally beaten.
A race track that is unfortunately closed now, (due to the land being bought by a company) used to have a "beer garden". That was an isolated area of bleachers on the back side of the racetrack. If you wanted to drink, this was the only area. I liked this. I think this was very similar to what I would call family seating. You had language occasionlly, but no alcohol in the main grandstand.
A lot of professional sports teams have places like what you're talking about. I know the Minnesota Twins have special family seating areas where alcohol is restricted and a more family-friendly atomosphere is promoted. The local minor-league baseball team up here has a similar set-up I believe.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/22/2008 10:40:36 AM
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doinkdom
Posts: 4319
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: rcjames
quote:
ORIGINAL: doinkdom
I'd just lean forward and ask one of them if they could please tone it down just a little because you have little kids with you. I wouldn't get into a big discussion, but I would request they refrain or keep it quieter.
I don't think that's too much to ask.
Good advice, and if that did not work, I would find a school official to handle the situation. Football games are considered school activities and the same rules apply there for students as in the school.
Thanks
RC
Very true...we had a couple of fellas get suspended from school for bad behavior and potty mouths at a high school football game.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/22/2008 5:05:02 PM
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BillBaileyBFAFan
Posts: 341
Joined: 6/5/2008
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quote:
ORIGINAL: TorchHeart
quote:
ORIGINAL: BillBaileyBFAFan
I think a good talk with your nephew and son about how some people have no respect and use these people as examples for what kind of people they don't want to be would be a good idea.
I agree that scolding or threats don't work , it only inflames the situation.
I would really love to see sporting facilities implement family seating areas, where alcohol is not served and where people can take their kids and enjoy a game or race without the children being verbally beaten.
A race track that is unfortunately closed now, (due to the land being bought by a company) used to have a "beer garden". That was an isolated area of bleachers on the back side of the racetrack. If you wanted to drink, this was the only area. I liked this. I think this was very similar to what I would call family seating. You had language occasionlly, but no alcohol in the main grandstand.
A lot of professional sports teams have places like what you're talking about. I know the Minnesota Twins have special family seating areas where alcohol is restricted and a more family-friendly atomosphere is promoted. The local minor-league baseball team up here has a similar set-up I believe.
Well that's great to hear. That's the kind of thing that would attract me those venues.
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RE: Hearing Potty mouth at football games...what to do? - 9/22/2008 8:56:12 PM
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colliefan
Posts: 3002
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Raleigh, NC
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This is from the website of the Canes' arena:
quote:
Guest Conduct
Proper Behavior is expected from all of our guests. Obscene language or gestures, abusive/rowdy behavior and physical confrontation will not be tolerated at the RBC Center and will be cause for ejection and/or arrest.
Please immediately notify the nearest usher or arena representative if actions of this type occur.
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