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Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 5:21:03 PM
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tykester88
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Joined: 4/28/2005
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My cousin just lost her 6 month old to SIDS. How can I tell her that eventually everything should be allright. What should I do?
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 5:41:07 PM
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Zhi
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Joined: 7/31/2007
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Well, my sister in law lost a baby when she was almost 6 months pregnant. I am afraid I will have to say that everything won't be alright eventually. It's something she will be living with for the rest of her life, but it will get less painful as time goes on.
So don't try to tell her that she will get over it, because she probably won't. Just tell her that you are very sorry for her loss, that you will be praying for her, that you hope that someday she will have peace about it, and that you are there for her if she needs anything or just needs to talk.
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The optimist says the glass is half full. The pessimist says the glass is half empty. The engineer says the glass is twice as large as it needs to be.
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 5:42:02 PM
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JimboFletch
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Don't say anything like that. Hug her, tell her you are so sorry, and that you love her. Much more may cause unneeded pain.
Even strong believers aren't always receptive to some intended consolation very soon after losing a child.
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 5:53:19 PM
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CherishedbyGod
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quote:
ORIGINAL: JimboFletch
Don't say anything like that. Hug her, tell her you are so sorry, and that you love her. Much more may cause unneeded pain.
Even strong believers aren't always receptive to some intended consolation very soon after losing a child.
I totally agree and that is so sad...
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~I would love for you to come and learn about Jesus of Nazareth with me in the Writer's Roundtable Folder~
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 6:58:22 PM
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Liveloved
Posts: 1614
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quote:
My cousin just lost her 6 month old to SIDS. How can I tell her that eventually everything should be allright. What should I do?
Let her talk. Let her cry. Let her mourn. I have found that even sound biblical thoughts are often reacted to and not received at a time like this. So just be there as a sponge to absorb her tears. If the time comes to say something, ask the Lord to give you the words.
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 7:09:31 PM
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Psalms274
Posts: 971
Joined: 8/13/2005
From: Georgia
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Liveloved
quote:
My cousin just lost her 6 month old to SIDS. How can I tell her that eventually everything should be allright. What should I do?
Let her talk. Let her cry. Let her mourn. I have found that even sound biblical thoughts are often reacted to and not received at a time like this. So just be there as a sponge to absorb her tears. If the time comes to say something, ask the Lord to give you the words.
This is excellent advice.
I am so sorry.
_____________________________
I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.
< Linus w/ a friends baby!
http://piswa.blogspot.com/
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 7:45:07 PM
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SonInMe1
Posts: 3521
Joined: 4/16/2005
From: my mom by God
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Men like to fix things. Some things..we just can't fix.
Just be there and listen.
In a previous marriage, my wife had several miscarriages and lost a baby at two weeks old. We would go to the cemetary and she would plant flowers and...it was so emotional to me to know she had lost someone so precious...and she was happy just to be there and planting the flowers.
She lost those babies in the early 80's. I am sure...time will heal the wound.
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You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
James 4:4
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 7:59:12 PM
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Pat-rebel_lady
Posts: 619
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quote:
ORIGINAL: tykester88
How can I tell her that eventually everything should be allright. What should I do?
I'm so sorry to hear about your cousin losing her baby; my sympathy to you and yours. We lost a son, during full term birth; caused by the cord being over his shoulder; Sept. 5th 1981, and we lost a grand-daughter almost 10 years later to the date, due to a cord death; I can testify that "eventually should be alright" does not come in this life time. it will get easier as time goes on; we don't cry as often; but the pain is still as fresh when we do cry.
This was the best advice  , so far:
quote:
ORIGINAL: Liveloved
Let her talk. Let her cry. Let her mourn. I have found that even sound biblical thoughts are often reacted to and not received at a time like this. So just be there as a sponge to absorb her tears.
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 8:07:06 PM
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makarizo
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my son would have just turned 23. I will never get over that.
pray for your cousin, pray for her heart, because I am sure that is where she is hurting the most. Be there for her because to the right person, when the time is right, she will talk about it.
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/2/2008 8:42:53 PM
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SavedByGraceMD
Posts: 756
Joined: 2/13/2008
From: the poconos
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Psalms274
quote:
ORIGINAL: Liveloved
quote:
My cousin just lost her 6 month old to SIDS. How can I tell her that eventually everything should be allright. What should I do?
Let her talk. Let her cry. Let her mourn. I have found that even sound biblical thoughts are often reacted to and not received at a time like this. So just be there as a sponge to absorb her tears. If the time comes to say something, ask the Lord to give you the words.
This is excellent advice.
I am so sorry.
I agree. This is good advice.
_____________________________
Isaiah 41:10
"Fear not for I am with you,
Do not be dismayed for I am your God,
I will strengthen you and help you,
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand"
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RE: Losing a baby - 7/14/2008 9:35:18 PM
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tykester88
Posts: 2
Joined: 4/28/2005
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Thanks to everybody!!! Your thoughts and prayers are a wonderful thing to have.
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