on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (Full Version)

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mbgb -> on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/18/2007 5:49:49 PM)

My husband slapped me yesterday. We've been married over a year. The foul words have been used for a while. We need major prayers to do God's will. We are separated now. Obviously, I'd love to make this work. I love my husband deeply. But Rob, my husband, has anger issues, and blames me for every one of his short comings. He is not saved, but he believes God (our God)exists. Please pray for his salvation. Please pray that the Lord will show Rob the truth about what he says and does and will speak to him in a way that he can no longer refuse the Lord. Please pray that Rob will drop to his knees and ask God's forgiveness. Please pray that we both have peace with the situation. I am currently separated from him and headed for divorce. I'd love for a miracle to happen, and I then would know I would not have to divorce him. But if God would rather have me safe and out of the marriage, then so be it. I tried to stay, but I could not take the verbal abuse anymore, and once he hit me, I knew I had to leave. I've been trying to live by example for about 6 months and thought it was getting better, but that just came out of nowhere, and I didn't deserve it for what I did. Which was nothing. He doesn't understand and continues to ask why I didn't say I was sorry. I think he should apologize to me for a year+ of emotional, verbal abuse. But right now I'd just settle with him being sorry to God. I'd rather him do that than ever talk to me again, because I know that's what will change his heart from the inside, the only thing I can think of. PLEASE PRAY FOR US... We need it! Thank you for any help you can offer.



jaimestarcross -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/18/2007 6:27:25 PM)

Just because you separated doesn't mean you have to divorce.
Getting away from abuse was needed because no one deserves
to be hit/abused.
I have known many people who have separated and not divorced.
They didn't run out to find a new love interest either - they wanted to raise
their children in a home where there's peace not constant fighting/abuse.
You can encourage him to seek help and pray for him(of course!)
Let him know you want to keep the marriage but the abusive behavior
has to be dealt with - he can learn other ways to deal with anger.
I pray you find the peace you are seeking and get your
husband back when he's capable of dealing with his anger without abusing you
or anyone else for that matter.



TMeeks -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/18/2007 11:50:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mbgb

My husband slapped me yesterday. We've been married over a year. The foul words have been used for a while. We need major prayers to do God's will. We are separated now. Obviously, I'd love to make this work. I love my husband deeply. But Rob, my husband, has anger issues, and blames me for every one of his short comings. He is not saved, but he believes God (our God)exists. Please pray for his salvation. Please pray that the Lord will show Rob the truth about what he says and does and will speak to him in a way that he can no longer refuse the Lord. Please pray that Rob will drop to his knees and ask God's forgiveness. Please pray that we both have peace with the situation. I am currently separated from him and headed for divorce. I'd love for a miracle to happen, and I then would know I would not have to divorce him. But if God would rather have me safe and out of the marriage, then so be it. I tried to stay, but I could not take the verbal abuse anymore, and once he hit me, I knew I had to leave. I've been trying to live by example for about 6 months and thought it was getting better, but that just came out of nowhere, and I didn't deserve it for what I did. Which was nothing. He doesn't understand and continues to ask why I didn't say I was sorry. I think he should apologize to me for a year+ of emotional, verbal abuse. But right now I'd just settle with him being sorry to God. I'd rather him do that than ever talk to me again, because I know that's what will change his heart from the inside, the only thing I can think of. PLEASE PRAY FOR US... We need it! Thank you for any help you can offer.


I'm no trying to minimize ANY physical abuse; but, the fact that this is happening at this stage is truly alarming. This is NOT the way to start a marriage and it appears that problems began almost from the first weeks of your life together.

Of course, your husband needs the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit in his life. And, needs prayer. But, you need to have the advice of someone that can deal with you directly. Please seek out a pastor or competent counselor.

I'd also suggest that you edit your message to remove your email from the public. It's better to reply on the private message features of the forums that give you a bit of a safety firewall. I've removed it from the quote.



blessednw -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/19/2007 3:41:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TMeeks

quote:

ORIGINAL: mbgb

My husband slapped me yesterday. We've been married over a year. The foul words have been used for a while. We need major prayers to do God's will. We are separated now.


I'm no trying to minimize ANY physical abuse; but, the fact that this is happening at this stage is truly alarming. This is NOT the way to start a marriage and it appears that problems began almost from the first weeks of your life together.

Of course, your husband needs the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit in his life. And, needs prayer. But, you need to have the advice of someone that can deal with you directly. Please seek out a pastor or competent counselor.

I'd also suggest that you edit your message to remove your email from the public. It's better to reply on the private message features of the forums that give you a bit of a safety firewall. I've removed it from the quote.


Ditto to what TMeeks says, you need someone besides some various voices here. This is important stuff and you need direct help. God has people near you, I am sure.

I am so sorry you are having to walk through this trial, for all the pain you must be feeling. I urge you to keep coming back to God and crying to Him. He is wanting to be close to us in our time of need. May He give you some trusted comrades who can pray for and with you during this season. I hope your husband can receive the conviction of the Lord re: his behavior...its his only hope. Trust God to get through to him for you.

I will pray for you.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/19/2007 4:07:19 PM)

Thanks to everyone! Please keep us in your prayers. I'm going to try to tune in here every day until there is some sort of final solution made. I don't know what to do now. We had a few emails bantering back and forth and I'm sure they didn't go so hot. He's called a few times, but I decided not to talk to him on the phone and haven't since I left. I also told him today I didn't see the point in us even talking at all unless he was contacting me to 1) say that he's truly sorry and is seeking counseling currently or 2) he has asked the Lord to be his savior. I don't really see the point other than that. I do not have any more strength to try to talk to him when he turns everything I say into an argument. I have carried my weight and then some in this marriage and I am ready to end it unless he starts making some effort to have a successful marriage. That's where I stand today. Please keep us in your prayers. Thanks for all that you have said and done for us already. It's more than I could have hoped for. But any help is still greatly appreciated if it is your desire. Thank you so much. Let me know if I can return the favor.



Sadey -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/19/2007 4:50:00 PM)

I think you are doing all you can to save your marriage. You can't do it by yourself. Abusers are always agrumentative. It how they wear you down but you can deal with it by refusing to talk to him when he does that. Don't hang up on him without telling him that you will not talk to him when he is acting like this. Say it kindly then hang up, quietly.
Do you have family and friends you can turn to? I hate to think you are handling this alone although you are doing a great job. If you have someone you can get suggestions and help from then you will have some tools to deal with this.
I did have one thought, if he calls you and says he is saved and has accepted Christ, don't fall for it. If its true he will not mind proving it to you. If its not true, he will fuss and carry on that well you said if I accepted Christ and now you won't give me a chance. At least a year with counseling for you both might let you know he has really changed. Then if he wants you back make it another year of seeing him and spending time with him before you decide. If hes faking it he won't be able to hold it together that long.
God bless you, you are a remarkable woman,.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/19/2007 11:04:34 PM)

Things are getting hard now. Just for everyone else's peace of mind, I do see a counselor, and have since we began having problems, and she's wonderful. I also have great parents who are nothing but supportive, and friends that do the same. I'm trying to stay busy and positive. But it's the quiet of the night that gets hard.

I told him not to talk to me anymore, in so many angry words, caused by him telling me a bunch of lies about myself, but as my counselor says, he doesn't make me say those things, but he sure doesn't help. Anyway, I of course feel bad now, but I know that ultimately what I said was exactly what he should have heard, and is exactly what I need right now (no communication from him).

But it's hard with parties coming up for the holidays with our mutual friends who know nothing about our situation. I know there are far worse problems than mine, but please pray for me to be strong and not worry about those parties or the outcome of all of this. One day at a time. Pray for Rob's salvation as well. As that is what is important. But if I get lonely I'll go back to him, I just know it. Thank you for all of your kind words. Thanks for having faith in our Savior.



3tulips -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/20/2007 11:39:54 AM)

Praying for you and I am glad you are seeing a counselor.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/21/2007 11:27:58 AM)

Well, here's my daily update. We've set a time to meet and discuss separating everything. I don't want to do this, and it is extremely sad to me, but I'm just heading toward divorce. It takes a year, if God's will is to have something happen within the year, then so be it, otherwise, I'm just heading in that direction.

It's very hard and he does seem very sorry, but hasn't asked to get back together or anything, but I've already told him what he has to do. Until he does that, as far as I'm concerned this marriage is completely over. I'm very angry the past 2 days, and crying a lot at the same time. I guess that's part of the grieving process. But after reading all of the wise advice on this site, it helps me have confidence that I am truly doing the right thing. You people are amazing, with your thoughtful words and wisdom, that is a trait that only our God in heaven can provide. It's wonderful.

I'll try to repost every day. I hate that I'm the cause of so much grief on so many people, but I am a selfish human, and have done what I wanted, and not God's desire for me. Now with the holidays coming up, it's going to be hard to face everyone. No one in my family will judge, but it's still hard for me, I guess it's my pride. Bless you all. Thank you for all of your kind words.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/22/2007 11:36:02 PM)

Latest Update:
Now, I have decided (with advice from others) to make sure we don't meet about separating everything without a lawyer. I also told him I no longer want to go to "our" house alone, and definitely not when he is there. Because 1)it's too hard and painful 2) I'm scared of what could happen. I don't believe he's just a horrible person, but I just don't know what I'm doing frankly, and I don't know what to expect.

Please keep us in your prayers if you can. He called me 3 times today, and I didn't call him back once. I emailed him and asked him not to call me anymore, because I told him why several times before, and he should just get it. It makes me confused and unsure of why I do anything at all concerning him. Anyway, I really think he has anger issues with his father's death (died same year as my mom...1983). Anyway, he's very "manly" and I truly don't think he's ever dealt with it properly (although I'm not a shrink) and I honestly think he became hardened to God in his life in high school, that's when I've heard stories of his doubt. I know in middle school he attended church regularly. Anyway, PLEASE PRAY IF YOU CAN. Anything helps...I'm just very confused, lonely, and lost, and I have a real desire to make my husband feel better, but that just turns everything upside down if I give in again, we need a real change to happen...a miracle probably. Thanks for anything. Happy Holidays!

P.S.-I forgot. I also told him in a seperate email that I was sorry I told him I was praying for him (which usually offends him because he thinks I think I'm better than him...which obviously I don't at all), but I said that I was sorry because I was just revealed to today that I need to work on finding forgiveness for my own sins...a lot of them, and that I had no business dealing with my husband right now. I asked him to forgive me for saying I was "so worried" for him, when I needed to deal with my own sins first. PRAY FOR US, PLEASE!!! Thanks.



Prayerwarrior1 -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/23/2007 10:18:48 PM)

I pray that God would restore your marriage.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/26/2007 5:31:15 PM)

Here's my latest update:
I made it through the Holidays. So did he and his mom. I talked to him today, and asked him how it went, and we just got into a huge argument. My parents and I sat in a circle in the den and just prayed. Then, I decided to go to the gym, to keep me occupied, and called Rob on the way, and just apologized for everything he said I never apologized for (even though I have several times), and said I was so sorry for getting him into this mess, and that also I wanted to thank him for all of the good times we shared. He agreed, and said he was sorry he couldn't make it work. And we left it at that. All I can do is pray now. I can't even talk to him anymore, it just makes everything worse. I'm not doing a bit of good anyway. But I'm glad God gave me the right words to say, because I think it was Him who did it. We both needed some peace, and a positive form of closure, I believe.

Please keep us in your Prayers, if it's not a big burden. I just pray to do God's will for myself and for this marriage. I also pray to be forgiven for everything I've done, since the time I've began straying from God. I also pray that I will not feel guilty about things I cannot change (because the guilt is weighing me down so much right now), and that God will put plenty of people in my life, in the coming months, to keep me from becoming lonely, and straying off on a bad path. Please pray for the same for Rob. Thank you.



my quivers full -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/27/2007 12:39:42 AM)

My heart breaks for you as I am in the same boat. My wife separated from me in July and God has been disciplining this son. Fortunately, I am a Christian and I am growing closer to the Lord, but my wife says she doesn't want to be married anymore.

You do need to be safe and leaving was the best thing to do.

Father God, I ask that your will and your will alone is accomplished in this marriage. I ask that your Holy Spirit would convict Rob of his sins and reveal to him the judgment to come. I ask that Your peace would surround mbgb right now and that you would bring godly mature believers around her to encourage her. I also ask that You would give her a promise scripture to stand on in this dark time. Give her a promise to hold tightly to.

In Jesus name I pray, Amen



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/27/2007 5:18:22 PM)

Thank you.

I too pray for you.
Lord, please watch over My Quivers Full. You know his marriage is rocky. You know where his wife is heading, and You know that she, herself, does not see where she is headed or why. Please let your will be done in this marriage. But also, please give My Quivers Full peace and comfort during this time. Please hold onto him tightly as he struggles through this dark time. The pain is sharp, and you know what we are all feeling Lord. Please search My Quivers Full's heart and heal it, heal what needs to be healed so that he can walk through his everyday life with a servant's heart, but also a heart that has been healed by You, our Savior. Please let the pain cease, and fill the void in his heart with Your pure love for him and your concern for his broken marriage. This, in Jesus name I pray, Amen.



deermousie -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/27/2007 7:01:16 PM)

Oh, Mbgb, I'm so sorry. What an awful time for you, your heart pulled in two ways.

quote:

ORIGINAL: mbgb

Now, I have decided (with advice from others) to make sure we don't meet about separating everything without a lawyer.



Excellent move. A husband is supposed to provide for his wife, but when things like this happen he often becomes adversarial and she needs someone in her corner to look after her legal needs to protect her interests.

quote:

I also told him I no longer want to go to "our" house alone, and definitely not when he is there. Because 1)it's too hard and painful 2) I'm scared of what could happen. I don't believe he's just a horrible person, but I just don't know what I'm doing frankly, and I don't know what to expect.


I like it that you are in touch with your feelings rather than denying how you feel, and that you're taking steps to set up boundries to protect yourself and your feelings. Keep it up.

quote:

He called me 3 times today, and I didn't call him back once. I emailed him and asked him not to call me anymore, because I told him why several times before, and he should just get it.


He gets it; he just doesn't want to do it. Build his calls out... change your phone number?

quote:

It makes me confused and unsure of why I do anything at all concerning him. Anyway, I really think he has anger issues with his father's death (died same year as my mom...1983).


If he still struggles 24 years later, he's going to probably keep struggling many more years. His anger issues may be a form of idolatry: "I want my way and will rage/get even with the universe until I get it because I'm more important than anyone else (including God who let it happen)." Take a look at what the Bible says: Proverbs 22: 24,25 and also see Proverbs 29:22.

quote:

I'm just very confused, lonely, and lost, and I have a real desire to make my husband feel better, but that just turns everything upside down if I give in again, we need a real change to happen...a miracle probably.


Bless you, it would be expected. You got married and expected to have a marriage, not a boxing ring. You have given your heart to him, which is appropriate for a marriage. What a tough time for you. I'm really glad to see you holding the line, because he is probably hoping you'll give in and come back under his conditions. The way wife-beaters often work, is that first hit was to see if you'd leave or accept it as part of marriage. For women who cave in, the man may see that he can get away with this and it can escalate from there and gets worse and worse.

quote:

I was just revealed to today that I need to work on finding forgiveness for my own sins...a lot of them, and that I had no business dealing with my husband right now.


Just because you have sins to deal with doesn't mean you shouldn't get off the tracks when a train is coming. You probably should deal with him now, if in no other way to come back in a year and see if anything has changed (his words don't count, only sustained actions). You guys are married, he is abusive, you have sins (like the rest of us) and he has grossly violated Scripture that says for husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the Church and gave Himself (to death) for her (Eph. 5: 25). If he is not a Christian, then he has no clue what God intends for your marriage and is in slavery to his own sin. Your best bet is, as you have been doing, pray for his salvation, and maintain your boundries.

If he says he's become a Christian, let him walk with the Lord at least a year before you take him back. Talk is cheap, and wife beaters are often manipulating liars.

Take a look at 1 Cor. 7: 13-16, too.

I am praying for you, dear sister in the Lord. Keep on keeping on, seek God's face, and let Him bring you comfort. (((hugs)))



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/27/2007 7:22:45 PM)

Thank you. Those Bibile verses were a great help and comfort. They also are going to hopefully help me to get back on track. Thank you for the concern and prayers. God Bless.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/28/2007 5:02:21 PM)

Today's update:

Well, Rob's been calling me and I've been answering the calls. Our conversations have gone well, but please continue to pray for me and for us if you can. I need strength to be able to stand my ground and not get swept up in false statements. I need to soak myself in God's word so that I can be prepared for the spiritual battle that lies ahead. Please pray that Rob's heart will be softened and that he will see what needs to be changed on his part, and hopefully will come back to the marriage with a heart set on God.

Thank you, and God Bless.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/29/2007 7:34:01 PM)

Thank you all.

I am still facing the same problems, but wanted to update a bit....

I think we've all been praying that I would be surrounded by good Christian friends right now so I wouldn't feel as lonely, and I wouldn't stray onto a bad path (like going back to my husband right now). Anyway, a good Christian friend of mine in Atlanta just called and said she had a few friends in a similar situation to mine at the moment, and they are all just going to watch a movie and pray on New Year's Eve, and I just can't believe it because that just sounds wonderful to me. It may sound really boring to all of you hip swingers ;-), but for me it's just what the doctor ordered. I just couldn't fathom going to a party around here, seeing all the couples kissing at New Year's, and knowing my husband may be doing I don't know what. *gasp*. I just think God has answered, and is still answering my prayer for companionship during this time. Please continue to pray for Rob, and for us all on NYE.

Please pray for us all...that horrible "kissing" thought just crept in. It would absolutely break my heart.

Thank you.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (12/29/2007 10:09:54 PM)

Sorry for all of the updates...

But, I just talked to Rob, and was talking to him about 1 Cor. 7, about where an unbeliever can leave his wife if he wanted. This was after I called...again...to apologize for everything I've done that wasn't what a Christian wife should have done. Anyway, he sounded surprised about what I was mentioning in the Bible. He's always claimed to know so much about the Bible, but more and more I'm finding he doesn't know so much. He wanted to know the verses so he could read it later. (Yay!...even though he's done that before) Anyway, I am really confused, because our conversations have gone absolutely nowhere for a long time, and I was confused as to how our marriage would ever work anyway, and I was wondering which path I should truly take, I was really confused. I've been praying, and reading the Bible. Anyway, that kind of cleared things up, so if he does want out of this marriage, truly, he can leave. But otherwise, I will just fight for it. I'm just trying to do the right thing, as God would have me do things.

Anyway, please continue to pray for us and our situation if it's not a problem. I just hope his heart can be softened, and we can remain married, and that God can work on my heart on whatever it is that needs healing or softened. I do not know what is happening right now, it just all seems kind of hopeless.

Also, my cousin Caleb, and friend, Matthew, both have cancer and need serious prayers. Caleb goes in for a bone marrow transplant on Monday (new year's eve). Please pray for the surgery to go well, and that if God is willing, it will clear up his Cancer forever. Also, please pray for Matthew to not give up hope, as he's tired of taking chemo and has said he'd rather die. He's only 25! Please pray for them to both accept Christ as their savior, as they are very special to me and others. Also, for comfort during these horrible times for them. Thank you so much for all of your kind prayers and words. God Bless you.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (1/2/2008 6:57:50 PM)

Hi all,
I just wanted to update my status. NYE went great! It ended up just being 3 of us gals, but we prayed in the New Year this year. I think 2008 is going to be much more positive. Anyway, Rob's basically been calling me every day lately, and I'm just letting HIM call ME instead of the other way around. It's been hard, but overall, much less painful to me, and also a good lesson for him most likely.

Other than that I have been really praying hard, reading my daily newsletters from Rejoice Marriage Ministries, and trying to fight for my marriage, and to just do God's will in general. My friend from this weekend bought me two fantastic books. One is called "For Women Only" and it explains what a man really needs (it sounds kind of "overdone", but she did a lot of scientific research, and questioned thousands of men, came up with all these valid results), and the author goes to my friend's church and is married to a strong Christian man....anyway, I found it very useful so far. Also, another book written by another lady at her church called "Preventing Marital Nonsense". I've been trying to read these two. They have been helpful. You all may be interested in picking one of these up, or ordering online. They also have a "For Men Only" book written by the woman and her husband to help men understand what women really need. It's all helped.

Well, Rob just now called again, and said he wanted to talk about things. I told him we should do it in public. I have no idea what it is that he wants to talk about, so PLEEEASE PRAY for us in the coming days. Things have been going pretty well on the phone because I've just let him call me (my dad says that's a much better solution for myself anyway, so I don't keep getting hurt). I'm going to keep praying and trying to walk with God each and every day for the rest of my life. It's AMAZING how powerful this time apart has been and how much closer I've grown to God. He really does want to soothe my broken heart, but it's such a great experience, it's as if I don't even mind what's going on in my marriage right now, I just want to stay so close to God...He's my favorite friend again! I'm so grateful He's taken me back. I am still trying to hold my ground with Rob, as he still hasn't made any changes as far as his anger and abuse has gone...so please continue to PRAY for us in that aspect. However, my new book has shown me that most men really desire respect more than to be shown "love", and I've been letting Rob know that I respect him lately...so maybe through that I can get to him on a deeper level, and help his heart to soften towards me and especially the Lord. PLEASE PRAY FOR US!!!!

I pray that we can all stay strong in our walks this year. May God hold us and keep us, and be there to comfort us. May we all stay strong for our marriages, and may we pray for healing.

Thank you for all of your concerns. God Bless you all! You've been so much help. Thank you for your prayers!!! Hope everyone is doing wonderfully!



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (1/2/2008 8:52:27 PM)

Sorry, I keep replying to myself. But I just also wanted to mention, that honestly, I think I am a frightened of my husband, because I know it will take a real miracle of God to TRULY change his heart and the way he thinks. It is NOT ok to hit me, ever. Please pray for my strength for each time I talk to him on the phone. Because how quickly I forgive and have forgotten how bad he's put me down and hurt me in the past. Please pray for me to know what to pray for as well, and for God's protection to be with me always. Thank you.



soundDRwife -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (1/2/2008 11:15:48 PM)

mbgb--- I been reading your post for some time. But never said anything.But I wanted to say something now and that is to just say Keep the Faith, Keep Growing in the Lord and I will be praying!



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (1/3/2008 8:39:46 PM)

Thank you so much. Any prayers are a HUGE help, I can just tell. Everyone has been so kind to take time out of their lives to pray for mine. It means the world to me. Thank you.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (1/4/2008 4:06:39 PM)

Hi all.
I'm trying to stay fairly updated here. We all know that it is God's will if He decides to change my husband's heart, or somehow work a miracle in my marriage, so that peace will be brought upon this situation one way or the other. I just wanted to say that today imparticular has been tough. I went to let our dog out, as my husband is out of town on business just for the day. Anyway, I got depressed because of a few things at the house (angry about one thing). And I am soooo thankful I was able to keep my cool because of one thing imparticular that I still haven't heard back from my husband about. But in the past I would have blown up at him and caused a huge argument (not to most people, but just because he doesn't like anything condescending said about him at all), but instead I kept my cool, and didn't leave him a nasty-ish note, I just called his cell phone and left a pretty informative message that I feel was nice and non-judgemental, just questioning about this book that has caused a fight before. Anyway, long story. Anyway, I guess I'm just thankful because now that I've "cooled down" I realize what a horrible mistake and setback it would have been to state my feelings, that I know don't get any kind of tender response anyway. Sad but true.

So, I thank God today for helping me to remain in composure, and I pray that He will continue to have me live an exemplary life in front of my husband. It is hard. And I AM getting quite lonely, I'm also depressed. I take Effexor, but if I miss one day of my meds, I just start bawling and can't hardly get out of bed. I guess this whole separation thing really is taking its toll on me more than I thought.

Thanks for all of your prayers. They mean so much and definitely help me through my days. God Bless you.



mbgb -> RE: on our way to divorce....please PRAY for us!!! (1/5/2008 7:12:51 PM)

Hi all.
I just wanted to say that I am going to meet Rob tomorrow at 1pm Eastern Standard Time so PLEEEAAASSEE PRAY FOR MEEEEE. We are meeting in public and are going to discuss whether we want to continue on or head to divorce. He asked what I wanted. I said I still love him, and that I have fought for our marriage. I told him biblically I cannot leave, but said he is free to leave. I said I am sure there could be change in our marriage. But that I really wanted him to go to counseling. He said he absolutely would not and is overall quite mean. I guess he always has been, I was just in denial and feel very foolish. Anyway, please pray for my safety, for a decision to be made tomorrow one way or the other...I am ready to decide what it is I need to continue to pray for. I would really appreciate it guys. Thanks.

PS.- Please pray!!!!!! I am very scared of being talked into something I don't want to do, or doing something that is unChristlike, or giving into Rob for stuff. PLEASE PRAY!!!!!!!



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