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RE: Homeschool-aphobia

 
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RE: Homeschool-aphobia - 5/23/2008 11:34:29 AM   
cynthia


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hephzibah610

Also, I have talked to several people (friends and family) and many seem to doubt that I can do it. They don't come right out and say it but it is what they are not saying that troubles me. One person tells me that it is a REAL sacrifice as though I have not sacrificed through these years for my children. Another says little, as does my husband who I know is wondering if a person like me could do it. I have already struggled with doubting it myself...so their seeming lack of confidence in me is rather disheartening. I get the feeling that I am taking on something way too big for me. Truly, it does seem overwhelming in knowing where to start (even though I have looked up some of the resources mentioned here.)

(I am growing discouraged so any prayers for God's clear direction and for the courage to do what He tells me to do would be helpful!!!)

Thanks!

This is very common. What you are saying is mild compared to a lot of what I've heard and seen in the homeschool community. People make these comments even for people who are homeschooling elementary school for goodness sakes! If the Lord directs you to do something, He is going to give you all you need to accomplish it. Homeschooling is not easy, but it is certainly doable. It takes research, time, money, energy, etc., but it is not out of reach of most thinking people. People that do not understand homeschooling are telling you that they don't know if you can do it because they don't know if they could do it. Homeschooling is just another aspect of parenting. Most people are perfectly capable of doing a good job of it.

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RE: Homeschool-aphobia - 5/23/2008 9:47:20 PM   
Jenny-Fair


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I once heard an honorary aunt of mine gloating that she and her grandson's teacher had 'talked her (her daughter) right out of homeschooling him!' She had no good reason...except that obviously he'd be better off in public school (on plenty of ADHD meds, of course).

People really will try to talk you out of it. Fortunately you don't have to take their advice.

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Post #: 27
RE: Homeschool-aphobia - 5/23/2008 10:43:57 PM   
cynthia


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Another thought: Do you think most people are smarter than you? How about those of us her in the homeschool support folder: do you think we are all smarter than you? Hopefully not! We are all normal people who want what is best for our children. We have chosen the route of homeschooling because we believe that is the best route for our families. We are not amazing and incredible people, but we are dedicated and serious about teaching our own children, so we are and we are doing just fine. You are no different. You are as smart and capable as we are. You can do it. Homeschool statistics show that homeschooling works on all levels. These statistics do not only take into account the best and brightest. They take into account the general population of homeschoolers. Are you average? Then you'll do just fine.

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Post #: 28
RE: Homeschool-aphobia - 5/24/2008 1:34:12 PM   
sen10tious


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Hephzibah610


... They don't come right out and say it but it is what they are not saying that troubles me. ... as does my husband who I know is wondering if a person like me could do it. I have already struggled with doubting it myself...so their seeming lack of confidence in me is rather disheartening. I get the feeling that I am taking on something way too big for me. [...]
(I am growing discouraged so any prayers for God's clear direction and for the courage to do what He tells me to do would be helpful!!!)

Thanks!

I think you already know God’s direction. And why do I think that? Because in the OP you wrote, "It has grieved my heart to see him losing his love for learning." That sounds very much like the Holy Spirit is witnessing to your heart. And also the way you are reacting to the silent opinions indicates that you already know God's direction, but you just want someone to agree.

The best confidence builder is to get a few successes under your belt. The catch-22 is that you have to start before you can have success.

You have done the research, asked for advice, and you are quickly reaching the point where you are going to either take the leap or be in disobedience. I can pray for the courage part, but from the sound of your posts, the clear direction part has already been answered.

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Post #: 29
RE: Homeschool-aphobia - 5/24/2008 8:49:28 PM   
cynthia


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I suggest you read Judges Chapter 6-8. The Lord doesn't need someone who is confident in herself. He needs those who are confident in Him, not those who are confident in themselves. He also doesn't think too well of those who discourage others from doing what He has told them to do.

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Post #: 30
RE: Homeschool-aphobia - 7/16/2008 9:13:27 AM   
Hephzibah610

 

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Still praying about homeschooling....seem to vacillate between fear and trepidation and excitement...what a strange mix. One thing that worries me is (and I think I mentioned this before)...how does one get personal time...My personality does not do well if I never get solitude from time to time. How can one do this while at home with a child every day? I know there are "play groups" etc....but putting more and more on my plate increases the anxiety levels for me.

I am asking my husband to pray as well so that we both hear...when I know, specifically this is what the LORD wants, it will be easier to move ahead and trust that He will work it out....but without that assurance, I feel I am standing on shaky ground.

Keeping things simple seems like the best course of action...the three "R"'s mostly...but motivating my son to do his work, I'm afraid will become a point of contention between us and instead of bringing us together will tear us apart.

I question my motivation. I have been frustrated with his teacher and feel that her teaching style and his learning style are like oil and vinegar. (He will have the same teacher again this year if he goes back.) But I wonder is more about me, or about him? (Although he has voiced that he doesn't want to go back.) I don't want to make the choice out of my own frustration, but out of knowing and obeying the voice of God for us.

Guess I just needed to let some more "steam" and "worry" out...

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Post #: 31
RE: Homeschool-aphobia - 7/16/2008 11:34:32 AM   
cynthia


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Your son is going into the sixth grade. I cannot imagine that he's going to be constantly with you. You should the ability to go spend some time alone in your room reading or whatever it is you want to do. Is that what you mean? I understand that most people need some alone time, but I don't get how you wouldn't have alone time when your child has to be at last eleven.

Being frustrated with a teacher that doesn't work well with your son is a perfectly good reason to homeschool. Frankly, I think that homeschooling should always be the first option and if there is some reason why a person cannot homeschool, other options should then be considered. Your motives are for your son to get a proper education and using the school for this purpose is not working for your family. He is your responsiblity in the first place, so I cannot imagine what could be wrong in that.

You are the parent. If your son doesn't want to do his work, then there are character issues that need to be addressed. Make that your first priority. He needs to learn to be obedient to his parents and to have a proper work ethic. His work is to get his studies done. If he is unwilling to do that, then correcting that should be addressed.

For Christian parents, godly character should be the number one priority. Academics are important, but they ought to be taught on the foundation of good character.

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My husband and I have a motto:
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Post #: 32
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