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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 2:26:09 PM
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Mrs.X
Posts: 2939
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From: Newberg, OR
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That rebte check we're all getting this year...the Duggars will be getting 6,600 (600 per adult and 300 per kid) this year. Wow! Unless there is a max amount Uncle Sam gives back.
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From Sweet Grass to the Packin' House
A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger. -Proverbs 15:1
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 2:33:38 PM
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stellaluna
Posts: 4219
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God
You know, everyone's experiences are different. We can't project our own childhood onto other people. I was the oldest of a large family, did a lot of childcare growing up, and went on to have six of my own. Others here have had different experiences. Just because we might have felt a certain way growing up doesn't mean the Duggar children felt the same way we did. They are all individuals. My guess is that some of them will grow up to follow in their parent's footsteps, and some of them will choose a different path. Most of them will probably follow some elements of the way they were raised, but differ in other areas, especially if they marry someone who was raised differently.
You are completely right and that is why I tend to stay away from these discussions. 
I have absolutely zero problem with kids sharing the load--doing chores and whatever else to contribute to the family. I have absolutely zero problem with kids learning to care for babies or those younger: how to bathe, change diapers, feed, etc. Teenagers should have experience with babysitting--boys and girls--in my opinion. There are many life skills that should be learned while your living at home with your parents. Being responsible for another child, though, is where I draw the line.
This is what gets me riled up about the Duggars:
quote:
Each older child has one or two younger “buddies” for whom he or she is responsible.
quote:
there is a sign-up list in the kitchen for children who feel they need one-on-one time with a parent.
quote:
From watching programs about the Duggars, I know that they use a "buddy system" where an older child is paired with a baby, usually when the baby is around 8 months old. The older child is then responsible for much of the baby's caretaking and raising.
During a documentary I watched, I heard Mrs. Duggar say, "Every child gets to be Mom's buddy until the next baby comes along, then it gets assigned to someone else." It kind of makes it sounds like she just likes infants.
Also, the 15-year-old daughter makes lunch everyday and the 17-year-old daughter makes dinner every evening. I have no idea how much free time these kids get, if any. I hope they have some sort of social life, friends, fun things they do that are just for them. I have no idea.
(Quotes taken from MSNBC.)
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 2:34:16 PM
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OLEEguacamole
Posts: 1051
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children must be under 17 last tax year to qualify.
if we don't want their household numbers, we shouldn't want their big check.
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 2:38:01 PM
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LaurainAL
Posts: 1295
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quote:
ORIGINAL: OLEEguacamole
children must be under 17 last tax year to qualify.
if we don't want their household numbers, we shouldn't want their big check.
I think there are people who are envious of the Duggar's, but not for their big stimulus check.
Just curious what they could be getting. It's all speculation since we don't know their income level. If they do get the $6600, I wonder how they will spend it?
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 2:38:33 PM
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Ellie-Mae
Posts: 3792
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From: The EMPIRE state!
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I would love to have their household number... with or without the checks. 
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 2:41:40 PM
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Ellie-Mae
Posts: 3792
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I was thinking about what they might want to get as well... We are getting a new floor for our downstairs and a front loading washing machine. With their house being so new, they probably don't need that kind of stuff. I am wondering if might go towards a newer vehicle or maybe more play equipment for their yard.
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 3:07:06 PM
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dradynsmom
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After hearing about Ma Duggar pregnant with number eighteen my hubby and i started talking about how many children we would like to have - we have on e son who is 15 mo and he has a five yr old daughter (whom we are trying for custody). Anyway first he said 3 more then yesterday it was atleast 4 more. It keeps changing (and always up never down LOL). I don't think I'll ever have as many as the duggars but i guess the hubby and I both agree we want a large family. We hadn't even discussed how many till i heard the news about the duggars. Amazing what that makes you think about.
Steph
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Philippians 4:13
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 3:36:49 PM
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stateofgrace
Posts: 1993
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quote:
ORIGINAL: stellaluna
Also, the 15-year-old daughter makes lunch everyday and the 17-year-old daughter makes dinner every evening. I have no idea how much free time these kids get, if any. I hope they have some sort of social life, friends, fun things they do that are just for them. I have no idea.
I suspect that they don't have individual "social lives" because that's generally frowned upon in those circles. They probably socialize as a family with "like-minded" families.
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 3:37:07 PM
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Karaboo2
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My hubby keeps saying enough to fill one of those half-sized buses ... but to get a full sized bus so we have room for all the groceries!
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<-- Caleb
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 3:38:25 PM
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Ellie-Mae
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Do you mean like a 15 passenger van?
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 6:40:01 PM
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Sideways
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Now, when I was a youngster, I knew 2 6-children families. They were both kinda interesting. One mom already had 4 and was on her 5th pregnancy. She'd always wanted six, but said this pregnancy was her last; her body just couldn't take it anymore ('cause it ain't just the uterus that gets used and abused during pregnancy). Turns out, she was having twins! So she got her six after all, with one less pregnancy.
The other one already had 5 boys and were dying for a girl. When the 6th was a girl the mom did say "Now I can stop", which made all of us wonder if she would've kept going. The oldest did tell me that they were disappointed when #3, 4 and 5 were boys. The girl had a very feminine name, but her brothers quickly changed it into a boyish nickname, which they vigorously enforced. So, we figured her brothers would turn her into a proper tomboy. 
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 8:29:11 PM
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Karaboo2
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Ellie-Mae
Do you mean like a 15 passenger van?
No ... it is a bus, but a mini-bus ... essentially take a school bus and chop off the back half ...
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Tea Drinkers Anonymous
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 8:30:12 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
Posts: 2550
Joined: 8/9/2007
From: California
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quote:
The oldest did tell me that they were disappointed when #3, 4 and 5 were boys.
In my opinion, that is one of the worst reasons to keep having kids. If a couple wants the opposite sex that badly, then they need to adopt. It is so cruel to be disappointed in your kids for something they can't control.
I always admire Maggie for making it clear that that is NOT why they had a 3rd child, or why they'll have a 4th, 5th.........
I will admit I always thought the ideal set of kids would be 2 boys and a girl, HOWEVER, I always promised myself that I would be just as thankful, and love my kids just as much if I had all 3 boys, or all 3 girls, or 4 the same, or 2 the same, or whatever, and if I REALLY REALLY wanted the other kind, I would look into adoption(plus some folks around here who grew up in the only-girl-with-2-brothers-life have informed me, it's not so great as I thought ).
I think the Duggars have been a fairly good witness to the media, but I was a little dissapointed that before they had Jennifer, she made it very clear that she was hoping it was another girl. Considering they already have quite a few of each, and if their philosophy really is to accept whatever God gives them, she should have just said she was thankful to receive another gift whether it was a boy or a girl, and if she had any hope, it was only that it would be healthy, but if even if wasn't healthy, she would still love the child, and they would still strive to be the best parents they could be for the child.
< Message edited by OneOfHisJewels -- 5/13/2008 8:46:56 PM >
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-Mrs. Wifey
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 8:33:35 PM
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lightshineon
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I always wanted girls when, I was pregnant, and got my wish three times.
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Be sure you vote for those, whose views you want your children to emulate.
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 8:47:42 PM
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Sideways
Posts: 3628
Joined: 4/12/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: OneOfHisJewels
I think the Duggars have been a fairly good witness to the media, but I was a little dissapointed that before they had Jennifer, she made it very clear that she was hoping it was another girl. Considering they already have quite a few of each, and if their philosophy really is to accept whatever God gives them, she should have just said she was thankful to receive another gift whether it was a boy or a girl,
I don't blame Ma Duggar to much for that. When she had Johannah, it had been at least 8 years since she'd had a girl, so all of Johannah's sisters would be a good bit older then her. When Jennifer was born, that puts two girls close together in age.
Since these kids get most of their socialization from their siblings, I can understand wanting to have a sister close in age to yourself.
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 8:53:21 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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From: California
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Well, JoyAnna's kind of by herself.
I don't want to start bashing the Duggars or anything, as I am the one that started the thread, but, I really think that
"We accept WHATEVER gift GOD chooses to give us WHENEVER he gives it,"
and
"I really really want this baby to be a girl," are almost two contradictory statements.
A sister for Johannah is good reason to be glad after the fact, but not to have a preference before.
P.S. I'm the 2nd of four girls, and the youngest is severely disabled, and sometimes people who were expecting would be very adamant about wanting a boy or a girl right in front of us. And I felt like screaming sometimes, "Can't you see by looking at my sister, that if it's healthy, who cares if it's a boy or a girl?"
< Message edited by OneOfHisJewels -- 5/13/2008 9:02:02 PM >
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"We basically use what I have seen referred to as "get off your butt" parenting. It employs more interaction, more redirection, more prevention, and usually less spanking."
-Mrs. Wifey
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 9:00:03 PM
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Ellie-Mae
Posts: 3792
Joined: 4/9/2005
From: The EMPIRE state!
Status: online
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I remember being so sick of people assuming that I was trying for a girl, that I used to tell them that I would be thrilled to have another boy. Boys are fun and I won't have to worry about getting new clothes for him for years.
I wish that I had thought of the baseball team line.
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Please do not PM me about this message, discuss it at the water cooler, or include it in your church bulletins. If you have questions, please keep them to yourself. ~Kerrlaw
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 9:01:57 PM
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Sideways
Posts: 3628
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Oh, you're right, JoyAnna is 10 and her closest sister, Jinger, is 14, but there's no controlling that.
I think even the hardest core QFers have hopes for a baby's gender, even if they're willing to accept whatever they get. Maybe Michelle was just being honest about having a preference.
I wonder what age the buddy system starts up. If each older child has two buddies, then would someone like JoyAnna (10) have a buddy or be a buddy or is she on her own?
I didn't know they had two buddies, that does sound like a tremendous amount of work, on top of all the cooking and cleaning the girls have to do.
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 9:10:09 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
Posts: 2550
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From: California
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quote:
Since these kids get most of their socialization from their siblings, I can understand wanting to have a sister close in age to yourself.
That's their choice, though. No one is stopping them from being involved in a bigger church, or joining a home school group or something. That's still no reason to burden a baby with an expectation. Especially when they DO already have both, when MANY families I know have only one kind.
_____________________________
"We basically use what I have seen referred to as "get off your butt" parenting. It employs more interaction, more redirection, more prevention, and usually less spanking."
-Mrs. Wifey
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RE: #18 on the way - 5/13/2008 9:14:20 PM
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Sideways
Posts: 3628
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quote:
ORIGINAL: OneOfHisJewels
No one is stopping them from being involved in a bigger church, or joining a home school group or something.
They are part of a home church and are shown occasionally socializing with other large families, but their TV specials do imply that the vast majority of their time is family.
I think a lot of people hope for a gender, but they get over it real quick when the actual baby is put into their arms. They don't strike me as the kind of family that would hold a child's gender against it once it's born.
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