RE: SAHM Support Part II (Full Version)

All Forums >> [People] >> Women Only



Message

PrincessDonna -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 8:44:58 AM)

Bible study is at 9...might want to spend the night Tuesday.[;)]



BlessedMamaofmany -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 9:14:46 AM)

hmmm! I'm helping my friend with childcare since she's working, so I'll make sure I'm off the hook for those days next week.
Sandy



HisCovenant -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 9:15:38 AM)

I'm so glad everyone had a good Mother's Day. That card was hilarious, Zoebob!

I get tired of the cycle of cleaning, too. It seems like it just never ends. Laundry doesn't bother me... but yesterday I had a little spurt of temper when after finishing loading up the dishwasher and getting it set to run I turned around and hadn't cleaned the pans off the stove. If I bleach the sink, dh rinses a dish and leaves bits of food in it to dry. If I pick up all the clutter, he comes home and strows the mail, his pocket contents, and shoes all through the house. If I mop, he cuts the grass and tracks stuff in. That's the thing about being a SAHW that drives me the most nuts. If I do the work, I hate to see it messed up quickly.

On the flip side, if I take a break, I don't feel at all guilty. My work doesn't end when dh comes through the door. I still have to feed us and clean up the kitchen, if I do nothing else. Also, the things I do with my time that aren't "working" are still of benefit to myself and dh. For example, I ice skate during the week, which sounds frivolous. However, the exercise is good for me and dh benefits because I'm able to do more physical things for longer periods of time than if my exercise was walking around my neighborhood. If I sit down with a cup of tea or go outside to read for 1 hour in the middle of the day, it's of benefit to him in that I don't work myself to death and get grouchy due to being so tired.

I guess in my mind there's a line between laziness vs not overdoing it and enjoying life. Guilt isn't a big problem for me, but when I cross into laziness, there's just enough to get me motivated to do better the next time.

Today, I'm just going to be around the house. It is the clean the office and pick up clutter day. I'm supposed to grocery shop, according to my schedule, but am wanting to wait until Thursday (payday) to do that. I probably will need to pick up some eggs, though. It will just be a regular day for me!



paulsbride -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 10:10:03 AM)

We went over our budget again last night (we try to do this monthly.)
We wanted to work out our short-term financial goals and some other stuff.

There are two things I am debating the pros and cons on and as a SAHM a lot of the financial management falls on me (Paul doesn't spend money!)

I am wondering firstly about getting our pay cheque just once a month as opposed to twice a month.
It seems easier to manage in both our minds to have a once a month pay day since we plan on following a strict budget. Any reason why it wouldn't be smart?

Secondly I am thinking about getting the grocery money in cash each month and making myself shop from that (as opposed to paying with my debit card.) I would start out the month with the alloted amount of cash and have to make it work through the whole month.
Apart from losing the cash [8D] are there any down sides to working with a pre-determined amount of cash for the groceries that you can imagine?

I am super excited about our budgeting goals/plans. I had asked Paul if we could go over our short term financial goals (I'd sent him an e-mail [:D] - anything major I want to talk about with him now I e-mail him about the subject and the date I want to talk about it [;)]) Paul impressed me and was totally prepared for the conversation - down to wanting to figure out the nitty gritty details of what our (potential) Christmas "vacation" up north would cost us (gas, hotel, food, etc.)



zoebob -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 10:19:24 AM)

My kids liked the card so much they went and read all the other ones with those 2 little characters. They sent me one that said "thanks a millioin" and then it goes on and on with those 2 saying "thank you" "thanks mom" 1 million times. I've had it running for almost 12 hours and it's at just over 500,000



firefightermama -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 10:37:58 AM)

I love those two little guys. Those are the only e-cards I send!

Jess, when we first got married and were super tight on money, I used to do our budget and get cash for our gas, and cash for our groceries, everything else was online banking or automatic withdrawals.
The only pain for me was getting to the bank to get the cash before we had a chance to use the debit card. Or, if hubby needed gas in his truck and i had the gas cash in my purse, etc.
We probably should be doing it that way now, but we never get around to doing the budget before the paycheck comes in.



PrudentWife -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 10:40:59 AM)

Hubby had a job once where he was paid once per month. It definitely helped him be very frugal. When he got his check, he'd pay his rent, tithe, put 50% of his gross on his student loans, and what was leftover had to cover gas, food, electric, and incidentals. He was single, so his life was much simpler then & it was easy to leave so little for his living expenses. The great thing was he got completely out of debt very quickly. The downside was it was a very lean, meager time for him. But we're the kind of people that don't mind going without if it means getting debt free.



HisCovenant -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 10:41:12 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: paulsbride
I am wondering firstly about getting our pay cheque just once a month as opposed to twice a month.
It seems easier to manage in both our minds to have a once a month pay day since we plan on following a strict budget. Any reason why it wouldn't be smart?

We did this when dh's company paid him like this and it was wonderful. I just paid bills once a month and everything else in the checking account was available for spending as I went about my day. There was no juggling the grocery money around the bills and trying to figure out how to pay for everything. The only person I have ever heard say this is a bad thing is my MIL, who has nervous tendencies. It scared her when raiseing dh and sil thinking there wouldn't be enough money to feed her family because once the money was gone, it was gone for the rest of the month. That type of thinking doesn't make sense to me, but that's how she felt. Who knows, maybe FIL was seeing the money in their account and spending what was budgeted for household needs. If you are working together and both aware or if dh isn't really a spender, I don't think there is a downside.


quote:

ORIGINAL: paulsbrideSecondly I am thinking about getting the grocery money in cash each month and making myself shop from that (as opposed to paying with my debit card.) I would start out the month with the alloted amount of cash and have to make it work through the whole month.
Apart from losing the cash [8D] are there any down sides to working with a pre-determined amount of cash for the groceries that you can imagine?


The only downside is that you will have to be vigilant to not go over your cash amount and probably shop with a calculator. There could be embarrassing times when you have to chose to put something back. You are really on your game, though, so you may already do these things. These suggestions are changes I know I would have to make if I did that. [:D]



Mrs.X -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 11:28:17 AM)

Yolanda, that sounds like so much fun. I love camping too, but I have to have an air mattress or bed or something. I can never just sleep on the ground. This summer we're hoping to rent a YURT because I just can't imagine tenting with two babies. I want to be able to relax too LOL!



lexie -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 11:35:03 AM)

Up until recently we have one pay day at the beginning of each month. We paid our rent and all of our bills right at the beginning of the month, and then I budgeted the rest of the money to groceries, gas and other expenses.

It didn't work at first, because Dh wasn't paying attention to the budget and just spending. There were a few times that we had to dip into our savings to get to the next paycheque. But once I got him to understand the budget, things worked out much better and we had a great system going.

I use a pre-determined amount of cash for groceries. When I make my grocery list, I write down the amount it will cost next to the items. I do everything for meals first and add that up. Then I add everything for snacks and add that up. I'm very careful about making my list only from advertised sales and needs, and I make sure I stick to my list. I usually end up with some room to pick up a few items that tempt me throughout the aisles.

Also, when I put the cost of items on my list, I tend to over estimate if I don't know the exact cost (or items that are based on weight). That way, I usually end up spending less than I had planned.



Mrs.Wifey -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 11:54:25 AM)

quote:

Secondly I am thinking about getting the grocery money in cash each month and making myself shop from that (as opposed to paying with my debit card.) I would start out the month with the alloted amount of cash and have to make it work through the whole month.
Apart from losing the cash


That is the system we are getting ready to go back to using, it works well for us. We do cash for the grocery, gas, clothing, and entertainment budgets. Although right now our entertainment budget is Netflix, we just dropped our monthly budget by $500 to pay off debt(especially the truck so we can trade it in). It's definitely tight but I can manage it as long as I'm strict.

As far as getting paid once a month... We have never had that option so I've never tried it, but I would think it would help you be more disciplined.


ETA- I do feel caught in an endless cycle of laundry, dishes, and vacuuming but I often felt the same way at work. I just think work was more rewarding in the short term not only because of the paycheck but because of nice comments from the parents of the children I was teaching.

My MIL and I just finished our 3 mile walk and I forgot my house keys so now I am stuck at MIL's until Micah gets home from work around 6 or 7. It's not so bad normally, I love spending time with her and we get along fabulously but I'm stuck in my icky, sweaty clothes.



PrincessDonna -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 12:13:54 PM)

I do have a sinus infection. Are we surprised? I'm waiting until Brian gets home tonight to go to the pharmacy. Already took both little monkeys to WIC, the store for milk, and the doctor's. They are so full of energy and they wore me out!

Yay for nap time...12 more minutes![:D]



HisCovenant -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 12:26:56 PM)

Donna- I hope you get to feeling better.

Ryanne- That's awful! I just hate being in sweaty exercise clothing all day. [:'(]



paulsbride -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 1:22:46 PM)

Ryanne - could you not borrow something of your MILs to wear?
When I was like 14 my best friends pad leaked and she got blood *all over* the back of her skirt at church. And older lady took her to her house which was really close by and loaned her this super tacky skirt, but she had nothing else to wear [8D] So she came back to church wearing this hideous skirt.

Thanks for the opinions to my questions!! I am whole heartily going to attempt this. [:)]
Ryanne - we've just reduced expenses/eliminated unnecessary ones in an attempt to get rid of our debt soon too!! Good for you [:)]
There are some expenses in our budget that drive both of us insane - like the amount we pay for internet and cell. Both things we could do without, but they go beyond convenience to have them - Paul does school online, and sometimes he can't do it till midnight or later, so he needs to get online at home. And for the cell it's required with his work and he travels so much even if we had a land line the majority of the time the only way people could get a hold of him is his cell anyway, so they'd always be calling that.
We are going to call about changing our plan to a less expensive one - that should help! But those two are major expenses that we just can't eliminate and it stinks!

We have reduced groceries - for now I am working on an $80/week budget for everything - including diapers. Makes me sweat a little thinking about attempting this... but I just need to be smart about it. And get on top of the couponing and the overage from coupons [;)]
CVS has been a blessing - we have all the toothpaste, toothbrushes, deodorant, face wash and (mens and womens!) body wash we could possibly need - and I have passed on a ton of that stuff too. So those expenses have pretty much been eliminated thanks to CVS.
For those of you without a CVS nearby Walgreens runs a similar program. It confuses me a little (even tho it is suppose to be "simpler" than CVS!) but I can point you in the direction of blog tutorials on the system if you're interested [:)]



LaurainAL -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 1:36:33 PM)

Donna: I think someone already mentioned the neti-pot. It has done wonders for Shane's sinuses. He has been plagued with chronic sinus infections for years, but used the neti pot this year and only had one.

I hope you feel better soon



PrudentWife -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 2:09:18 PM)

I don't know how using cash for gas would work with these rising prices. Us ladies could do it, since we don't work and many of our trips are optional. Our husbands have to drive to work every day. If he only has $60 for gas for the week, what does he do on Friday when he needs to drive home from work & is out of gas? [:o]

CVS has helped us because I've been able to not increase our household item budget despite having two in diapers now (and two consuming insane amount of batteries for all their noise-making devices). I've also stocked up on some items.

I'm going to have to increase our grocery spending though. I've been artificially keeping it low by depleting our pantry. I'm basically in my last week of being able to do that. I had mainly been using pantry items because going grocery shopping with two babies is SO hard. Not to mention the hassle of carrying bags from our parking lot into the condo with two in tow. But I'm on my last bits of everything, so I'm going to have to replenish my stock.



SweetLittleErin -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 2:17:01 PM)

quote:

and two consuming insane amount of batteries for all their noise-making devices)


We have found that rechargeable batteries and charger are a great investment. They cost more up front but we have quickly paid for ours in just our remote batteries and other such things. We bought a couple of "sets" of the sizes we use and keep one set charged to replace. Plus they usually have a quick charge for "emergencies".



zoebob -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 2:17:47 PM)

Since those toys are usually noisy, we always let them stay dead when they died.



Mrs.Wifey -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 2:50:30 PM)

quote:

I don't know how using cash for gas would work with these rising prices. Us ladies could do it, since we don't work and many of our trips are optional. Our husbands have to drive to work every day. If he only has $60 for gas for the week, what does he do on Friday when he needs to drive home from work & is out of gas?


I overestimate how much he will need, and then if he needs more he takes it out of "his" account. His Walgreen's paychecks go directly into our joint account, and his money from financial advising goes into a business account, so if he goes over what I budget for gas then there is still money for it...



lexie -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 3:37:05 PM)

We budget for gas but don't pay cash for it. We have the easy pay thing on our keychain and it goes straight to our mastercard. Every time we put gas in the car, we come home and pay from our bank account to the Mastercard. If we do go over what I budgeted for gas (Dh travels different distances each day), then we keep putting it on the mastercard and then pay it off the next month when we get paid as part of our credit card payment.

That only started working once we paid off our card though, but it's helped. With a tight budget, we don't buy anything we don't have the cash for, but I continually budget in a credit card payment just in case.

I think that is what has worked best for our bank account right now - cutting out unnecessary things, and overbudgeting in other areas so there is money left over at the end of the month to put in our savings, or cover if we go over somewhere else.



PrudentWife -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 3:40:29 PM)

Erin, we have a battery charger for size AA. But many of their toys & vibratey things need C and D and 9-volt batteries. Mostly size C batteries. I would definitely buy a charger for size C if I ever found one.



SweetLittleErin -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 3:44:01 PM)

We buy all our gas with Walmart gift cards. For us, the cheapest place to buy in town is Walmart. We just put some money on our card each time we are in the store.

We pay for everything via our credit card, its takes alot of discipline not to go over, but we get cash back, so we put everything on there and always pay it off each month. So far we have earned about $300 in cash back. We havent cashed it in yet, but plan to to help buy baby stuff.

When we can we usually go shopping together, if we both dont agree on a purchase (even with groceries) we dont get it, it helps keep us accountable and avoid impulse buys.



SweetLittleErin -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 3:45:10 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: PrudentWife

Erin, we have a battery charger for size AA. But many of their toys & vibratey things need C and D and 9-volt batteries. Mostly size C batteries. I would definitely buy a charger for size C if I ever found one.


Ah...I see. We have one for A and AA, we dont have many C and D things. Hmm..I didnt realize they didnt make them for those.



TammyIsBlessed -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 3:45:22 PM)

Anybody know if Canada has something similar to CVS?



SweetLittleErin -> RE: SAHM Support Part II (5/12/2008 3:49:40 PM)

We do not have any CVS in our whole state. [>:]



Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>



Forum Software © ASPPlayground.NET Advanced Edition 2.5 ANSI