Supporting your wife/girlfriends passions (Full Version)

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FindCaleb -> Supporting your wife/girlfriends passions (5/11/2008 3:34:07 PM)

Hey Guys,

New to the forum, but find great insights from your thoughts and ideas. I was born and raised a Christian and am in the first serious relationship of my life. ....and no, I'm not in high school! I wish!

I'm wondering your thoughts on supporting your wife or girlfriend in her passions? How do you balance supporting her in what she wants to do? I'm dating a passionate girl with lots of energy and ambitions (that definitely rival my own [:D]) and I find I have a hard time getting behind her and supporting her. They're good goals - missions oriented. I find that I can understand her ambitions (because I also am very ambitious) but it scares me too..

What do you guys think? Does your wife's ambitions every scare you? Are you ever afraid you won't know how to "handle" what she wants to do in life? I'm willing to bet this is an area I need to grow in... Just wondering if you guys ever went through it.

It's also hard knowing we are dating.

Thanks



YZGUY -> RE: Supporting your wife/girlfriends passions (5/11/2008 8:23:03 PM)

I haven't had any concerns in that area, as my wife's ambitions are, shall we say, not overly ambitious (at least in the career area - that is not a put down, she wants to work and be a part of family). I think if you feel you can't support her, I'd think through what you want in a wife. If you want a stay at home kinda woman, then a career oriented woman might make you think twice. If her ambitions take her to earning more $, you'll have to be OK with that. Or maybe you'd rather have her passionate about you more so than other things... Regardless, I'd put some thoughts into why you can't get behind her and why her ambitions scare you.



Konstantinos -> RE: Supporting your wife/girlfriends passions (5/11/2008 8:36:54 PM)

i dont really know what to say without you giving out a very specific situation and why you think you cant support her in that specific one?

but i'll second YZGUY. think about what kind of girl you want. personally i'd like either a stay at home or the missionary type like you said. if its a career though then probably not. i doubt i would like a career girl in the first place though but you probably already like her if shes your gf. but personally.. idk.. maybe its cause no careers appeal all that much to me i seem to think that even more so for girls it shouldnt be as high of a priority as getting married, having kids, spending time with them or me, being with freidns etc.



beauregarde -> RE: Supporting your wife/girlfriends passions (5/12/2008 9:24:12 AM)

My wife and I started dating in college. The expectation for both of us was a career. We did support each other. However, when kids came along, we tried her work full time, no time, and then part time, where she remain for many years. Only recently has she resumed full time work (her choice, not my requirement).

While she was part time, she filled a lot of ambitions through volunteer work - inside and outside of church, in schools, and such.



DaveW -> RE: Supporting your wife/girlfriends passions (5/14/2008 12:47:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FindCaleb

... am in the first serious relationship of my life. ....and no, I'm not in high school! I wish!

I'm dating a passionate girl with lots of energy and ambitions (that definitely rival my own [:D]) and I find I have a hard time getting behind her and supporting her. They're good goals - missions oriented. I find that I can understand her ambitions (because I also am very ambitious) but it scares me too..
if it bothers you that much, find another girl.



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