I really need to turn around my life (Full Version)

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royalaire -> I really need to turn around my life (5/26/2008 5:23:44 PM)

The way I have been living my life is not that of a Christian in the least way. If someone were to judge me by my actions; the things I do and say, I would be considered as an unbeliever. It's like a battle between my "good" self who has been in church for the last 19 years, who has salvation through Christ, and who has been the good kid. Then there is this other side of me which has been doing things I shouldn't be; drinking, smoking, cussing, listening to *that* kind of music, watching *those* kind of movies and TV shows, not reading my bible, or ever praying.

I feel so bad to say this but, I don't even enjoy church anymore. I used to look forward to going, I used to always pray, and my bible was read every night. The thought of me ever lighting up a cigarette seemed like something that would never happen. Anymore I drink at least once a week. Some of the words I say is something I would never would before be caught dead saying.

What bothers me the most is the fact that I am the most content I've been in years and this is the way I live my life. I guess it's satan's way of getting the best of you.

I know I need to make changes. I really want to get my life turned around. Any suggestions on what I should do?



GrahamCracker -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/26/2008 7:37:36 PM)

People become comfortable with being disobedient to God, often because their real motivation has been to please people. Since our society doesn't condemn sin anymore, people often don't feel bad about sin.



stellaluna -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/26/2008 7:42:00 PM)

quote:

What bothers me the most is the fact that I am the most content I've been in years and this is the way I live my life. I guess it's satan's way of getting the best of you.

The reason you're so content is because you're doing whatever you want.

quote:


I really want to get my life turned around.

No, I don't think you do. You feel guilty because you know what's right, but you're the "most content you've been in years."

You already know what you need to do to turn your life around. I'm sure of it.



Rufas2000 -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/26/2008 9:33:38 PM)

quote:

No, I don't think you do. You feel guilty because you know what's right, but you're the "most content you've been in years.


If the person did not want to change why would he / she bother posting on a message board? Taking the iniative to post here is a good sign.

quote:

I feel so bad to say this but, I don't even enjoy church anymore.


I can definitely relate. I was going to a church regularly but lately I've had a weird toe injury and the doc wants me off it AMAP. So I haven't been to church in several weeks. Sad to say I don't miss it much. I miss the idea of going to church and enjoying it but I'm not missing going to my church much. And its probably the one in the area I enjoy the most. I don't know if its me or the church (the social construct as construed currently in America, not the Spiritual institution established by God).

Where I have an advantage (maybe, read on) is that I never enjoyed or engaged much in the "traditional" "sinful" behaviors of smoking & drinking and such. But then again not doing those things might be masking my true spititual condition. I certainly need to change some stuff also.

quote:

listening to *that* kind of music, watching *those* kind of movies and TV shows


I do that. Although I don't think they're truly wrong, its just a matter of conscience. If you truly feel they are wrong then you'll have to deal with it but don't accept other people's opinions or attitudes on the matter as automatically correct.

quote:

not reading my bible, or ever praying


Thats where you should start. You have to start the rebuilding process somewhere. I suggest just making a commitment to pray, that's all for starters. Tell God how you feel. Don't concern yourself with drinking, smoking, church going, TV, movies, music or even Bible reading* right now. Just pray to God and ask Him what your next step should be. If you try to change everything overnight you'll become overwhelmed. God may work a miracle and allow you to do just that or He may decide that by changing things one by one you'll conquer the challenges / bad habits / sin in a more permanent way.

Best wishes and God bless.

quote:

Since our society doesn't condemn sin anymore, people often don't feel bad about sin.


Which makes it all the more remarkable that this person does. Its a hopeful sign but they have to want it more than the other stuff.




* Bible reading is very important but my suggestion is to start with a single step. If I had to choose which one is more vital I would take prayer. Some may disagree and that's OK. I suspect if the person prays earnestly he /she will be convicted to read the Bible soon enough.



teachered -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/26/2008 9:46:20 PM)

stellaluna,

quote:


I really want to get my life turned around.

No, I don't think you do. You feel guilty because you know what's right, but you're the "most content you've been in years."

You already know what you need to do to turn your life around. I'm sure of it.

How can you know what royalaire is really thinking?
Are you a mind reader? I seriously doubt it.

It's sad to say, but that is why so many who have strayed from God do not end up going back to church. It is people like you who keep them out. You should be ahamed of your self.

Royalaire, I would continue to call put to God and ask him to help you and guide you. You probably will have to make some adjustments in the way you are currently living, but ask God what those adjustments are. He wants us to come to him as we are.

I pray that your heart would be open to hear what God is telling you.



stellaluna -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/26/2008 9:58:07 PM)

I'm not trying to be cruel or unfeeling. This is a person who has spent his entire life in church and for all intents and purposes, living as a Christian. He knows what to do to turn his life around. He feels the "most content" he ever has. That is not indicative of being at the point where he wants to turn his life around and no one here can change the fact that he feels content.



Rufas2000 -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/26/2008 11:02:57 PM)

quote:

I'm not trying to be cruel or unfeeling.


I didn't think you were for the record. I still have to come back to the idea that if she* really felt "content" (I know she said it but ...) why would they start asking about change on a Christian message board? If I felt content I probably wouldn't be trying to change much about the way things are going.

* I got sick of typing he / she so I looked at the profile [;)], says female. I was assuming he too, not sure why.

Maybe they were content and now they are not? Perhaps they are looking back at the last few years (or months) and realizing how bad their spiritual condition was. When I get convicted about a sin condition I sometimes think / speak in the present tense also (as in I can't believe I'm doing that). Sometimes I do think / speak in the past tense though (I can't believe I did that).

quote:

He knows what to do to turn his life around.


I agree she does in a broad way. Like most people know how to get out of debt big picture wise but the task seems so daunting people sometimes don't know where to start.

Again, I'm certainly not trying to paint you as judgmental or anything, I think we're just looking at it from two different but very plausible directions.



stellaluna -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/27/2008 12:05:48 AM)

She. Whoopsie. [sm=icon_smile_blush.gif]

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rufas2000
I still have to come back to the idea that if she* really felt "content" (I know she said it but ...) why would they start asking about change on a Christian message board? If I felt content I probably wouldn't be trying to change much about the way things are going.

I think it boils down to good old-fashioned conviction. But I don't think the OP is at the point yet that a true change is truly wanted.

To the OP, you said:
quote:


What bothers me the most is the fact that I am the most content I've been in years and this is the way I live my life.

I have been there, I promise. That nagging doubt is the fact that you know better, but this feels better. It does feel good to do whatever you want. Until it doesn't. And the only way to get past that is to do what you know you need to: repent. As content as you are now, without Jesus it won't last. Eventually you'll have to do something else to feel good, and then something else, and then something else. It's all temporal and it all leads to death and separation from God. It's fake. But me or anyone else saying that won't make a bit of difference as long as you are content with the way you're living right now.

And Rufas, you're right. More information would make it easier to give advice.



SonInMe1 -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/27/2008 3:56:04 AM)

Sometimes these things start with a sin we have not repented of. An action that would have severe reprecussions that you have not acted in a biblical way to.

This sin could seperate you from God, just enough where these other sins get a foothold and before you know it, you are further and further away from God to the point He isn't even real to you anymore.

Go back. Search with God's help and strength and discover this sin, repent of it and suffer the consequences and go on in God's love.

Having said that, I could also be 100% wrong. I...don't know. I...suspect, you, do.



girlofmanycolors -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/27/2008 6:10:36 PM)

I would like to let you know that you are not alone in this! I am struggling with some of the same things myself. And it is quite possible to be more content on one level and be totally discontent on the deepest and most vital level, which is where I see that you must be since you are troubled by your lifestyle. I also second the person who said that you will not continue to be content with this way of living. Sin feels good for a while but not for long. I will be praying for you. God bless.



ugly_duckling -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (5/29/2008 1:32:33 PM)

It isn't good that you're distancing from God, but God will forgive you. He forgives all sins. Confess your sin and repent from it. You already feel bad about how you were liiving, and that's the first step. Try hard and fight to get God back in your life. Even though you enjoy the way you're living now, you should still read the Bible and pray because this will help you be filled with the Holy Spirit, which will turn your desires back to God. the reason that you are content with your life even though you're away from God is that you're not filled with the Holy Spirit.



endless_night -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/17/2008 3:22:13 PM)

First, you probably want to start with a repent heart (an honest Godly sorrow), if it is a public sin that you have done, I hope you have a strong heart, because you also need the forgiveness of the church. The great thing is, the Church cannot deny you that forgiveness. :) And secondly, you probably want to change your life around (realizing that only Christ can do this so don't try and do it alone) and start doing the will of God. Remember though, it's not going to be easy, but it will be worth it. :) Also, this change first starts with you. You have to want to change, God does not make that decision for you.



rcjames -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/17/2008 4:07:18 PM)

The very first sermon preached in the Church age ended with;

(Act 2:38) Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

(Act 2:39) For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off, even as many as the Lord our God shall call.

I know a lot of folks get their tidy whities all in a knot with me over this, but I do not see salvation without repentance.

Thanks
RC



JimboFletch -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/17/2008 4:12:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: rcjames

The very first sermon preached in the Church age ended with;

(Act 2:38) Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

(Act 2:39) For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off, even as many as the Lord our God shall call.

I know a lot of folks get their tidy whities all in a knot with me over this, but I do not see salvation without repentance.

Thanks
RC

RC, you said it well. I was just going to say, don't worry about turning your life around - turn it over to Jesus. When you fall in love with Him, you just can't keep yourself from trying to please Him and sharing Him with others.



rcjames -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/17/2008 4:19:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: JimboFletch

quote:

ORIGINAL: rcjames

The very first sermon preached in the Church age ended with;

(Act 2:38) Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

(Act 2:39) For the promise is unto you, and to your children, and to all that are afar off, even as many as the Lord our God shall call.

I know a lot of folks get their tidy whities all in a knot with me over this, but I do not see salvation without repentance.

Thanks
RC

RC, you said it well. I was just going to say, don't worry about turning your life around - turn it over to Jesus. When you fall in love with Him, you just can't keep yourself from trying to please Him and sharing Him with others.


Jimbo, I do believe we are ringing the same bell on this one.

SBC and Pentecostal Holiness unite.[8D]

Thanks
RC



Peter_Gunn -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/17/2008 5:14:23 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: royalaire

The way I have been living my life is not that of a Christian in the least way. If someone were to judge me by my actions; the things I do and say, I would be considered as an unbeliever. It's like a battle between my "good" self who has been in church for the last 19 years, who has salvation through Christ, and who has been the good kid. Then there is this other side of me which has been doing things I shouldn't be; drinking, smoking, cussing, listening to *that* kind of music, watching *those* kind of movies and TV shows, not reading my bible, or ever praying.

I feel so bad to say this but, I don't even enjoy church anymore. I used to look forward to going, I used to always pray, and my bible was read every night. The thought of me ever lighting up a cigarette seemed like something that would never happen. Anymore I drink at least once a week. Some of the words I say is something I would never would before be caught dead saying.

What bothers me the most is the fact that I am the most content I've been in years and this is the way I live my life. I guess it's satan's way of getting the best of you.

I know I need to make changes. I really want to get my life turned around. Any suggestions on what I should do?


I would say to start with the beginning and be sure you're saved. Only you and God can work that out. Beyond that, I am reminded of what David prayed..."search me and try me...see if there be any wicked way in me." (Psalm 39:23-24...but read the whole psalm!) If you're truly saved, God won't let you get by with anything! Hebrews 12:6 says "whom the Lord loves, He chastens." He disciplines His own.

I thought I was saved around the age of 8, but spent many years "doubting" my salvation. Being raised in a Christian home and in chruch, I passed it off as Satan trying to keep me from being effective, but I was happy with life as it was and not growing or maturing as a believer. It wasn't until I was 25 that I realized what I had been interpreting as "doubts" was actually God knocking at the door! When I understood that and realized where I was in relation to God and realized who I was in relation to God, and that He was my only hope...well, it was like a dam broke and it all became crystal clear in an instant. And since that moment, no more doubts! Plenty of that "chastening" God promises to His own, but no doubts about my eternal position.

One more thing...find a "real" person you can share this with. Choose very carefully, but find someone you can trust, probably someone older, that can mentor you. Again...choose carefully, but do it.



Prairiehiker -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/17/2008 8:48:15 PM)

Perhaps, you were living your life before because of religious obligations and not of genuine relationship with Christ. That would wear anybody down regardless of how faithful you are to your church. Christianity is not meant to be about following a set of rules without engaging your heart. IT's about a relationship with the living God. OFten times, we mistake church activities and involvement to being a good Christian. A lot of people who goes to church are only there for social activities. And if that was your reason for going, eventually, it'll get boring. And if you're being good because you think this is how a good Christian should act, eventually, you'll find it very restricting. There's no passion in that. There's no real relationship with God while you're following rules. It's when you ask God to have a living relationship that being a Christian becomes real. It's when you're walking along with Christ and you're allowing him to change your heart that you move from religious obligation to a relationship.



spdrgrl.603 -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/19/2008 12:03:16 AM)

ur not alone. i know this may not help but there are christians whove done worse. jesus died for our imperfections.... while i never drank (my dad was an abusive alcoholic so alcohol disgusts me) or smoked (cuz my granddad told me he'd haunt me and he's been long dead) i have lost my virginity at fifteen, cussed since i was twelve (i'm now 23), sadly i have stolen because the person stole from me (doesn't make it right), etc. acknowledging and facing the things your doing that bug you s the first step. surrounding yourself with more positive things is the second. like maybe to help you get back into reading the bible and prayer maybe joing a group or bible study. keep taking those baby steps to get involved and before you know it youll have that praying, not cussing, bible reading everynight realationship with god it sounds your looking for. personally i think he's already reaching out to you....



Cloak -> RE: I really need to turn around my life (6/19/2008 9:11:13 PM)

There is always HOPE in you want to sincerely change! I am also so PROUD of you royalaire!!! [:)]

I would recommend you to start looking for a good church and find an accountability support group where you can attend their meetings and find a sponsor you feel comfy with. Groups such as AA, Al Anon, Coda are prevalent in many church basements and are Free of charge, so why not take advantage?

I will keep you in my prayers!

Blessings!



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