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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 11:51:55 AM
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hotsaucygma
Posts: 2883
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quote:
ORIGINAL: joy2give2u
Be still and know that I am the Lord.........To me being still before the Lord can mean being physically still and inactive but rarely does......I can be still before the Lord will climbing a sand dune or riding my bike........
I believe God wants us to still our minds........to quiet the voices, thoughts, pictures and activity and be still before Him so that we can hear his voice without distraction.
I am currently reading (just started yesterday) a book called 90 minutes in Heaven, that a friend gave me. It is about a Baptist preacher that was in a horrible multiple car accident, he was pronounced dead on the scene. Since he was "dead" they tarped his car so gawkers couldn't see in, then attended to the other people and cars etc. before moving him. 90 minutes after the accident occured a fellow pastor/speaker from the conference he had been attending came on the scene and asked paramedics if he could pray for the person in the car (this is the short version of a long story...) he prayed and sang over the man... suddenly the "dead" man started singing with him! So they rush him to the hospital where he is still not expected to live. He ends up spending months flat on his back in bed, metal "halos" on his leg and arm, etc. Anyway, where this ties in (finally  ) is that someone in his church gave him a plaque that had the verse "Be still and know that I am God" on it. At first he was pretty cynical aobut it... after all, he couldn't move at all without extreme pain. But he said he learned that he did need to be "still", that movement had nothing to do with what he learned from that verse.
So, yes Joy, we can "be still" moving or not moving; or we can not be "still" even if we do not move at all!
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Dear Lord, let my words today be as sweet and delicious as cheesecake... for tomorrow I may have to eat them!
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 11:55:28 AM
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jlp1
Posts: 125
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From: Chicago
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Great post hotsaucygma!!!!!
quote:
his church gave him a plaque that had the verse "Be still and know that I am God" on it. But he said he learned that he did need to be "still", that movement had nothing to do with what he learned from that verse.
Funny 
< Message edited by jlp1 -- 5/30/2008 12:04:36 PM >
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 11:57:09 AM
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joy2give2u
Posts: 4966
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From: Indiana
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quote:
no you have to endure until the end jlp1 this statement makes me feel a little uneasy........To me endure means something which we have to go through that is painful or unenjoyable.........I don't see us living our lives this way.........I need to pray about this before I post.......I will be back later.
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God's Majesty seen through my eyes
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 12:17:17 PM
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jlp1
Posts: 125
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From: Chicago
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quote:
jlp1 this statement makes me feel a little uneasy........To me endure means something which we have to go through that is painful or enjoyable.........I don't see us living our lives this way.........I need to pray about this before I post.......I will be back later.
Hebrews 10:36 For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.
Hebrews 12:1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us.
Hebrews 12:7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? 8 If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons.
Life is not easy but it is precious and a gift from God.
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 1:37:23 PM
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iwillfearnoevil
Posts: 3644
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at lunch i finished up my book for class ... one of lessons stated "Thus we know that by Jesus' work on the Cross the authority and power of Satan was broken over the lives of those who accept Calvary's benefits."
i think by making a negative vow as OP refers to, that it could certainly hinder us from accepting this benefit of living victoriously in this area of our life!
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Photoblogging my life
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 1:40:04 PM
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John_O
Posts: 7684
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iwillfearnoevil
at lunch i finished up my book for class ... one of lessons stated "Thus we know that by Jesus' work on the Cross the authority and power of Satan was broken over the lives of those who accept Calvary's benefits."
i think by making a negative vow as OP refers to, that it could certainly hinder us from accepting this benefit of living victoriously in this area of our life!
Yes. That's the right way to state it!
_____________________________
Resistance is futile (if less than .25 ohms)
Psalms 46:10 Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 1:41:56 PM
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joy2give2u
Posts: 4966
Joined: 9/19/2006
From: Indiana
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quote:
90 minutes in Heaven, I was giving the book after my father passed away........interesting reading.
quote:
endurance endurance I see as a positive.........Like when you run a race.........if you have trained hard your endurance is strong and the race, though still hard is pleasurable and exhilarating.
The key is in the training........If you step up to the starting line and expect to run a long distance race with no training they you will endure a lot of pain, struggle etc.
I think often, we as Christians, expect to be able to run the race when something happens in our life, without taking the time to train daily.......and the race then becomes something you have to endure and get through.
Daily we must open our eyes to see God moving in our lives........
We seek to experience His joy, peace and freedom.
These are things we must seek daily not just when we face a struggle or battle.
lquote:
ay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us. Again a positive thing.....
Maybe I misread your statement earlier.........I took the endure to mean we must struggle through, endure hardship and pain.......etc.
I believe everyone deals with struggles, hardships, and pain.........but I don't think we have to just buckle up and endure them.........for I believe we are to face every circumstance with joy..........God promises us that His joy is not dependent on our circumstance........I also believe that each and every day we can see God's glory in sunsets, birds singing,children laughing, friends talking, co-workers helping......
The greatest power satan uses is His ability to draw our eyes off the Lord and to ourselves and our problems.
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God's Majesty seen through my eyes
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 2:02:19 PM
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Prairiehiker
Posts: 1422
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quote:
endurance I see as a positive.........Like when you run a race.........if you have trained hard your endurance is strong and the race, though still hard is pleasurable and exhilarating.
As an endurance runner, base on experience, I can fully affirm that joy and hardship can co - exist at the same time. I just finished running 7 miles in the rain, and though for most, it would seem like hard work, it was one of the most joyful experience I had today so far. Was it tough, you bet it was. But at the same time, ever step brings some sort of exhilaration that a person who doesn't run won't experience.
The same for our journey with God. It's tough at times, but when you know that God is there walking side by side with you, and cheering you on, you feel a certain joy with every step. And every step you get to know God more and you become intimate with him. The hardship becomes just another part of the journey that you have to overcome.
JLP1, I do agree with you that sometimes, God fight our own battle for us. I believe that He gives us enough grace to sometime allow us to give up our own striving so we can rest while He carries us. I've experience that in my life and my reaction was always, what the heck? How did i get through that? But I think God, in order for us to grow, He does want us to fight our battles. He commands us to put the full armour of God so we can fight and HE will be fighting along side us. This is another way God strengthens our faith and deepens our trust and intimacy with him.
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 2:10:23 PM
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joy2give2u
Posts: 4966
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quote:
As an endurance runner, base on experience, I can fully affirm that joy and hardship can co - exist at the same time. I just finished running 7 miles in the rain, and though for most, it would seem like hard work, it was one of the most joyful experience I had today so far. Was it tough, you bet it was. But at the same time, ever step brings some sort of exhilaration that a person who doesn't run won't experience.
The same for our journey with God. It's tough at times, but when you know that God is there walking side by side with you, and cheering you on, you feel a certain joy with every step. And every step you get to know God more and you become intimate with him. The hardship becomes just another part of the journey that you have to overcome. I wanted to quote these statements because I believe they are the whole point of this thread........
When God starts revealing all the junk from your past.....all the old vows, mindsets, ungodly beliefs it is like training with weights on.......when they come off and you are running the race you are even stronger with more endurance because of the hard training you did........yet even the training brings joy, excitement, more self worth.......etc.
I use to want to run the race and finish..........Now I want to run the race in a way so that I will win.........and for me to do that I need to train hard and listen to my coach(the Holy Spirit)
My Coach has decided for me to run faster and stronger it is time to remove so unwanted weight physically, mentality, emotionally and spiritually...........the vow was a spiritual and emotional weight weighing me down.
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God's Majesty seen through my eyes
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 3:00:35 PM
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jlp1
Posts: 125
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From: Chicago
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quote:
Actually I'm trying to prevent others from having to go through the same thing by reminding them to not get wrapped around the words
John_O I think your like that person who makes people think outside of the "box" to get people to look deeper than the obvious, God has given us all gifts
quote:
I think often, we as Christians, expect to be able to run the race when something happens in our life, without taking the time to train daily.......and the race then becomes something you have to endure and get through
Yeah a lot of christian get discouraged because they don't know what it take to win this race.
quote:
for I believe we are to face every circumstance with joy..........God promises us that His joy is not dependent on our circumstance........I also believe that each and every day we can see God's glory in sunsets, birds singing,children laughing, friends talking, co-workers helping......
yes we must be aware and alert but enjoy our live free from bondage
quote:
As an endurance runner, base on experience, I can fully affirm that joy and hardship can co - exist at the same time. I just finished running 7 miles in the rain, and though for most, it would seem like hard work, it was one of the most joyful experience I had today so far. Was it tough, you bet it was. But at the same time, ever step brings some sort of exhilaration that a person who doesn't run won't experience.
The same for our journey with God. It's tough at times, but when you know that God is there walking side by side with you, and cheering you on, you feel a certain joy with every step. And every step you get to know God more and you become intimate with him. The hardship becomes just another part of the journey that you have to overcome.
Yes Prairiehiker, you said it perfectly, I agree with Joy
2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
1Corinthians 9:24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. 25 Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable.
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 9:47:42 PM
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utilityfielder
Posts: 13133
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From: Home of the Champions
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Short answer #1
I have been unmarried for 57 years. Could I survive the change at this point in my life?
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/30/2008 11:15:48 PM
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woodwind228
Posts: 473
Joined: 5/8/2008
From: Atlanta
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quote:
Thank you so much jlp1. Before I posted this thread I was advised not too......some felt most of what I felt lead to share would not be understood or "heard" by people here.........I tended to agree yet could not get God to stop urging me to post..........I knew he had at least one person, someone I did not know, who he had prepared to read what he wanted me to share.........and I knew that my posting would not be well received by many yet I had faith that one person would read what I wrote and God would speak to them..........
Thank you jlp1 for confirming I was obedient to God.....
Funny how, even though time after time, acting in obedience God confirms we did as he asked.......it is still nice to know.
I've got a little more catching up to do with reading this post but I just wanted to say something before I forgot. Joy, you mentioned before that you were advised not to post and you were afraid to. Don't you think that was the evil one trying to talk to you again? How awesome it was that you didn't listen and cave in to fear, and that you were obedient to God telling you to post. Even if jlp1 was the only one God spoke to through you, it would have been worth it. (For the record, I think this thread has benefited many, not just one.)
I also wanted to add that God speaks to His people in many different ways and, yes, sometimes audibly. Probably more often through His word and through other people.
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*~* Susan *~*
These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world. --John 16:33 KJV
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/31/2008 10:27:30 AM
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devinevessel
Posts: 229
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quote:
ORIGINAL: hotsaucygma
The words we speak, or the words we hear, do not just leave our mouths or minds without effect. As the "sins of the father's" are visited onto the following generations, the words spoken by them "live" on too. If those are words of love and acceptence, stronger, mentally healthier children are raised. If they are words of hurt and anger, the effect is different. I'm sure most of us can come up with words from our past that still hurt us.
Satan "talked" to Jesus in the wilderness, do you really think he doesn't "talk" to us now?
Great post....I agree with you 100%. Our words have so much power and sometimes I tend to forget that. Proverbs 18:21 says that "Death and life are in the power of the tongue"
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U-C-L-A Fight!Fight!Fight!
Check out my blog
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/31/2008 4:09:55 PM
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dsfuva
Posts: 1868
Joined: 8/25/2005
From: Virginia
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quote:
ORIGINAL: utilityfielder
Short answer #1
I have been unmarried for 57 years. Could I survive the change at this point in my life?
That's an interesting thought. I've been unmarried for 48 years, but it would still constitute quite a change.
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RE: Why I am not married - 5/31/2008 8:01:13 PM
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DenimDiva
Posts: 6309
Joined: 9/28/2007
From: CA
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quote:
ORIGINAL: joy2give2u
This weekend I spent quite a bit of one on one time with an amazing woman of God. This is a woman, though I don't know well, her walk with God speaks loudly as well as the wisdom and power God's gives her to speak into the lives of others.
As we were driving home, after watching a most amazing sunset,(see avatar) we were discussing our family relationship. I was sharing about my mother and how hard it was for me to forgive her for the past pain and brokenness she had passed on to us girls through her choices.
I was sharing how I had to come to the point of asking forgiveness from her for my thoughts and anger towards her. I realized that it was not her mistakes which were holding me in bondage and keeping me from freedom but my unforgiveness.
I shared with my new friend, how between the age of 22 and 27 I vowed I would never allow a man to get close enough to me for me to hurt him. I vowed I would never get married......because I believed, with all my heart, if I allowed a man to fall in love with me I would hurt him......and there was no way....NO WAY....I was going to be the cause of such pain in another..........after all everyone kept telling me I was just like my mother and that is what she did.........she hurt my father and she hurt us girls...
Every man I dated I considered a "friend" making it very clear to him that we would only be friends. If I started to have feelings for a gentleman I stopped dating him and if I felt he was developing feelings for me I pushed him away.
As I was talking and sharing, my friend became quiet, contemplative and prayerful.
She asked me.
Dawn have you ever repented of your vow and asked for forgiveness from the Lord. Have you asked him to remove the vow you made?
I was like what? What do you mean.......I don't still believe what I felt then.......I do not believe that I am my mother's daughter in the since that if I marry I will hurt the man. I don't still act the same way and it is no longer my belief. I want to get married now........
I told her I don't push men away anymore and am more then open to marriage.....this all happened a long time ago and I was no longer intentionally keeping men at a distance.
She began to explain.
You see Satan is very legalistic. He is a legalist.
God is about grace and forgiveness but not Satan.....he loves rules, regulations and he especially loves vows........because you see vows, whether actually stated as a vow or just a statement or belief we have give him the legal right to hold you to that vow........
In the old Testament God set down laws to guide us as we walk closer to him.......with Him it was all about the relationship which would develop because of the boundaries he placed ........Satan took those same laws and put people in bondage with them.........
When I vowed I would never marry I gave Satan the legal right, I opened a door for him, to do everything in his power to keep me from marrying.
I gave him legal access to my mind so he could speak lies to me which lead me to believe men who were interested in me were not which often lead me to give them signs of disinterest.........
I gave him a legal right to allow my insecurities to tell me I would make an awful wife and mother.........I opened the door for him to shape my reality to reflect I am unworthy of love.
Being unmarried is not God's will or plan for my life........but Satan he loves it that I vowed I would not marry because it gave him the right to speak as loud or louder then God's voice on the subject.
Sitting in the car, next to my friend, the tears fell. I knew what I was hearing both from her and from God was truth.........I knew the reason I was not married was because I had made a vow I would never marry and never once had I given God permission to remove that vow from me.........for his blood to break the vow I made to stay single.
I cried, I prayed, I repented and I asked my father, my loving father to forgive me for making a vow which was contrary to his plans for my life.........I asked for his forgiveness for my unfaithfulness and asked his to break the generational curse placed on me from my grandfather, mother and my own heart/words.
An amazing thing happened. One I am not sure I can explain........
But I know I was released from the vow. I know that the spiritual world and the natural world came into alignment.........I know that for the first time in my life, in the area of marriage/children/relationships, things were being done here on earth as they were in heaven.........they were reflecting each other in my heart, my spirit, and my body.
I share this today because I know I am not the only one........I hear words all the time....spoken out of hurt and rejection.........
I hear a divorced mother speak........I am never going to get married again.....I can't handle that pain........then years later wonder why she is still single.
I know women who believe, and yes having a belief or faith in something not godly is a type of vow towards that thing, they will never marry because of past mistakes.
I know women who get into the same type of relationships, have premarital,over and over again because they believe no man can really love them so much he will wait till she says I do.......
Before I began typing I asked you to pray. I hope you did.........Now I hope you will spend some time reflecting over you life.....asking God to show you any vows you made, spoke,thought or believed which has kept God from giving you the blessing of marriage.
Once he reveals it to you I pray you will take the time to repent of the ungodly belief and vow seeking His truth in it's place and I pray you will ask Him to guide you into speaking new vows, new truths and placing your faith in the things he wants for you and not in the things your experiences tell you will happen.
If anyone wants to discuss this further or has a question please feel free to pm me.
With dailyjoy
Joy
Such an amazing post!
Thank you! I learned a lot from it.
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RE: Why I am not married - 6/1/2008 12:01:15 AM
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coinpurse
Posts: 97
Joined: 5/10/2008
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Did you decide at some point that you wanted to remain single or is this how life has played out for you so far? Do you desire to marry?
quote:
ORIGINAL: utilityfielder
Short answer #1
I have been unmarried for 57 years. Could I survive the change at this point in my life?
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RE: Why I am not married - 6/2/2008 12:24:25 PM
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joy2give2u
Posts: 4966
Joined: 9/19/2006
From: Indiana
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Good morning,afternoon or evening to everyone who reads this thread..........
I love it when God shows us something which in obedience we share with others then God allows us the privileged of being a part of something really amazing he is doing in another's life.
Friday night driving home I was a little sad at the ending of my tutoring. I had just finished all the paperwork and the reality that I would no longer be seeing these children all the time was making me sad.
I had a major decision on my mind and my thoughts were all wrapped up in me and my own thoughts. I wanted someone to pray with me and hopefully help me hear clearer what God wanted me to do.
At first I didn't know who to call which just added to my sense of aloneness from saying goodbye the my little kids....I tried a prayer warrior I knew thinking she would be the best choice... She was not home.
Call **** God whispered........
****? Why Lord ? When we get together we always talk about her and issues she is going through........Lord tonight I really just want someone who will pray with me.
He said........"Call ****"
I called ****. She asked me to come over.
I got to her house and since it was raining we sat out in her garage (privacy) and began talking.
As I had expected for the first 30 minutes all we did was talk about her and some things in her life.....
I was being very self centered with thoughts in my mind.....oh great Lord just what I thought would happen.........I don't have the energy to deal with her problems........all I wanted was someone to listen to me and pray for me.
Suddenly I hear God say..........share what you posted in the thread.
So I did.
She listened.
She asked a few questions.
I suggested we pray.
As we were praying God showed me something....
I took a deep breath and shared what I had seen........I then went on to say I sensed there was something.....some vows she had made in her life which still needed to be dealt with......I also said I am sure you have already asked God for forgiveness for your divorces and affairs yet I strongly feel there is something there God wants to address.
She began to cry........
In 15 years she had never once asked God to forgive her.......she had asked her ex husbands but never had she asked for forgiveness from God.
She began to pray......asking God to forgive her for the words she spoke in her first marriage........for making those vows when she knew she did not love him.......then she prayed for God to forgive her for breaking her vows with her second husband by having an affair.......
It was a very powerful moment......we were both weeping in the presence of the Lord.......he was moving powerfully.
After we were done praying.........She smiled......and though her eyes were red from tears and her makeup running she looked more joyful and peaceful then I can remember........She said she felt a huge weight off her shoulders.......
And the thing is not once did she realize, until God showed it to her that night, she had never asked his forgiveness..............so cool.
Then something so like God happened...........
She asked me.........the first time since before my father died.........how I was doing and what was going on in my life......
I shared I had come over seeking prayer and someone to listen but it was not important anymore.......I felt so alive after praying with her.
She insisted so I shared what was going on that I was seeking an answer from God regarding.......and asked if she would pray for me.
She did.........and here is the cool part.
She said the only thing she could hear God impressing on her.........were three words.......
Obedience and Stand Firm.
She said it was so strong.....she couldn't get the three words out of her mind........
I wanted God to speak into my life as someone prayed for me because I was struggling to hear from God........
As long as I had my mind focused on me he wasn't speaking..........but as soon as I took my eyes of me God moved.
Not only did he speak to me through someone and lead us in prayer for my concerns but God gave me the honor of being a part of ***** being set free of a bunch of junk from the past.........How cool is that....???
God is doing a new thing in so many of our lives..........
What is he doing in yours?
< Message edited by joy2give2u -- 6/2/2008 12:37:32 PM >
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God's Majesty seen through my eyes
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RE: Why I am not married - 6/2/2008 12:34:11 PM
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sunshinesoprano
Posts: 1036
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: Georgia
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That's so great, Joy, and that's usually the way it works. We NEVER know how God is working or who or what He may place in our lives to touch us and the ones we come in contact with. He is truly amazing and it is so clear how much He loves us.
PTL!
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Pure Heart-Fresh, Progressive Southern Gospel
Sing, laugh, love, PRAISE!
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RE: Why I am not married - 6/2/2008 12:55:48 PM
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sunshinesoprano
Posts: 1036
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From: Georgia
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