RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (Full Version)

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redeemedsaint -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/11/2008 3:33:33 PM)

This has been very helpful to me because I recently had to make some hard decisions and have stepped down from a leadership ministry. Instead of pursuing leadership, we need to be pursuing Godliness.



Deborah_S -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/12/2008 10:52:52 PM)

Praise the Lord! I am new here and was gravitated to this post.....

FINALLY the kind of forum I was searching for online. I have been wrestling with this in my heart for a while. I have a long story if anyone was interested. When I read the first post, it almost sounded like myself.

I am happy to be here and looking forward to getting acquainted with you people!

Deborah_S[:D]



BibleL7 -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/13/2008 4:21:44 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Deborah_S

Praise the Lord! I am new here and was gravitated to this post.....

FINALLY the kind of forum I was searching for online. I have been wrestling with this in my heart for a while. I have a long story if anyone was interested. When I read the first post, it almost sounded like myself.

I am happy to be here and looking forward to getting acquainted with you people!

Deborah_S[:D]


Welcome to the forums hope that you will find it helpful to you in your walk with the Lord and I am sure we will also be blessed by your being here.



buckifn -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/13/2008 10:12:02 AM)

Any organization will never be stronger than it's weakest link, and if that weakest link is the Pastor, an Elder, or teacher then the church is indeed in trouble imo and someone needs to sit down so the church can be strong.

Leaders are to lead by example. It's hard for many people to see past that part of their life.



Deborah_S -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/13/2008 3:01:18 PM)

My situation, opinions and Godly counsel appreciated!

As i was saying, i really appreciate this post. Here is my current situation.

I am in ministry with my husband at our church. We are currently in bible school and finished one year out of 3.(we had informal church training by our pastors for 1 and a half yrs just before that in the same place). When we started we got our ministerial licence. I was never 100% on having the "title" as minister or Pastor, being that our home wasn't 100% right in line with God- BUT no one is perfect and we were and still do (not enough will explain) strive to do that.

Some time ago my husband expressed interest in being the assistant pastor. Recently suddenly our pastor said "promotion time" now you are to become assistant. Simply to start as he says we are running out of time to get trained. There is alot more to this as far as trust issues( mine and my dh's concerns) and unclear expectations (mine and my dh's concerns). We went ahead and my hubby said "let's start over" and aim for turning a new leaf forgetting the past. BUT......

I feel in my heart that we are playing church games in a way. I dont even know for sure if this is from God -at least right now. It is a long story but we truly are not mature in the Lord (knowledge, yes, living out the Word- NO) and I don't know if my dh is fully assured by faith that this is right.
I feel in my deepest heart that because our house is not in order (esp in finances) that this is not right. Also my heart is no longer excited about serving at all and because of the hurts etc it is hard to trust. Also, there is snobbery and one-upmanship going on in our church that I am discerning BUT I DO and the ones above me dont see it!!!!! Also I have still some depression type problems that are still there but I am told "you are a leader, you can't show it" and it is also implied to me to "get over it and praise anyway".AAAAAAAAH!
NOW I am at the BRINK of this decision- step down from any preaching and ministering to people directly- just behind the scenes- and intercession prayer. Relearn what it means to serve with absolutely no titles or authority. BUT as a leave of absence NOT leaving permanenly....It has been tormenting me and the morning after we became assistants i had a yucky sense in my spirit. I just dont want to do anything out of FEAR but FAITH. NOt to please man but GodI have no one to talk to and I am looking into counselling hopefully that wont cost a ton of money.
I REALISE that there are so many things I am not saying- I am so desperate for help. I just feel to step out, even if opposition from own husband. I want to learn to back him up and get our house in order even if he doesn't take the reigns yet.
I am willing to step out and be wrong. I have done that many times. I have apologised to others when it hurt, when I wasn't wrong and they were, and have looked like a fool for the sake of the truth. I am tired of being double minded and need help. Need to really hear from God!!!

Any thoughts based on these fragments? I mean if in doubt, don't YET --if in doubt, step out!!!!

Thanks, friends,
Deborah_S



bigboytenor -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/13/2008 8:44:09 PM)

Brother RC, I have more respect for you every time I read your posts. It's comforting to know there are men of God who still walk the walk. God bless you, brother.

I know pastors who would crawl across the desert to cover up something rather than just come clean.

We had a deacon at my church about 1 1/2 yrs. ago who walked up before the congregation one Sunday and said, "My name is ______ and I have a problem with pornography. I'm resigning my position as a deacon and ask for your prayers for me and my family." We had a great time of prayer for that brother and he has, by the power of God, overcome his pornography problem and continues to meet with his accountability group. That's Biblical.



BibleL7 -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/14/2008 8:25:46 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Deborah_S

My situation, opinions and Godly counsel appreciated!

As i was saying, i really appreciate this post. Here is my current situation.

I am in ministry with my husband at our church. We are currently in bible school and finished one year out of 3.(we had informal church training by our pastors for 1 and a half yrs just before that in the same place). When we started we got our ministerial licence. I was never 100% on having the "title" as minister or Pastor, being that our home wasn't 100% right in line with God- BUT no one is perfect and we were and still do (not enough will explain) strive to do that.

Some time ago my husband expressed interest in being the assistant pastor. Recently suddenly our pastor said "promotion time" now you are to become assistant. Simply to start as he says we are running out of time to get trained. There is alot more to this as far as trust issues( mine and my dh's concerns) and unclear expectations (mine and my dh's concerns). We went ahead and my hubby said "let's start over" and aim for turning a new leaf forgetting the past. BUT......

I feel in my heart that we are playing church games in a way. I dont even know for sure if this is from God -at least right now. It is a long story but we truly are not mature in the Lord (knowledge, yes, living out the Word- NO) and I don't know if my dh is fully assured by faith that this is right.
I feel in my deepest heart that because our house is not in order (esp in finances) that this is not right. Also my heart is no longer excited about serving at all and because of the hurts etc it is hard to trust. Also, there is snobbery and one-upmanship going on in our church that I am discerning BUT I DO and the ones above me dont see it!!!!! Also I have still some depression type problems that are still there but I am told "you are a leader, you can't show it" and it is also implied to me to "get over it and praise anyway".AAAAAAAAH!
NOW I am at the BRINK of this decision- step down from any preaching and ministering to people directly- just behind the scenes- and intercession prayer. Relearn what it means to serve with absolutely no titles or authority. BUT as a leave of absence NOT leaving permanenly....It has been tormenting me and the morning after we became assistants i had a yucky sense in my spirit. I just dont want to do anything out of FEAR but FAITH. NOt to please man but GodI have no one to talk to and I am looking into counselling hopefully that wont cost a ton of money.
I REALISE that there are so many things I am not saying- I am so desperate for help. I just feel to step out, even if opposition from own husband. I want to learn to back him up and get our house in order even if he doesn't take the reigns yet.
I am willing to step out and be wrong. I have done that many times. I have apologised to others when it hurt, when I wasn't wrong and they were, and have looked like a fool for the sake of the truth. I am tired of being double minded and need help. Need to really hear from God!!!

Any thoughts based on these fragments? I mean if in doubt, don't YET --if in doubt, step out!!!!

Thanks, friends,
Deborah_S


I am sorry for your situation I will certainly keep you in prayer. Praising the Lord in song certainly can help depression but is not the only thing to do. You might check to see if you have state mentle health institute for low cost help. But I would find a couple songs to sing His praise each day it does help. Keep in prayer this also helps. As for church situation that is something that you and dh need to pray about together and discuss. I did not enter into ministry lightly but with much prayer. As I dont know about your church it would be difficult to say anything particularly since none of the churches I have been affiliated with licensed women or couples it was only the man who would be licensed. Basicly very much fundementalist. This is hard thing and I would however question if they require certain schooling why they would promote before schooling was even half finished. I was not required to take any certain classes this was just a call of the Lord and my pastor actually suggested it and I prayed for over a week before I gave him an answer. If you feel you are not ready for promotion yet your husband does is there a problem with him going on and you not? I dont know if this is possible with your church. But much prayer and praise is needed and much open discussion with dh. Sorry I could not offer more.



4IMPersuaded -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/14/2008 2:51:30 PM)

quote:

Brother RC, I have more respect for you every time I read your posts. It's comforting to know there are men of God who still walk the walk. God bless you, brother.


Ditto that, dear Brother! This community can always count on scripturally saturated wisdom from you and that is a rare and precious gift for all of us.

Deborah_S-- God bless you, you are clearly struggling through this important decision. You have to figure out whether this is the HS giving you discernment and warning you against taking this position or perhaps the enemy trying to keep you from being effective.

I can tell you that I chose to accept a postion out of pride about 10 years ago. It wasn't in ministry, but I knew it was not the job for me. I also knew how impressive my new title would be to my friends and family. It ended badly because I did not seek God's will. I will not do that again as it took about five years for me to recover to the point that I could see God's hand at work in it.

God's "no" always opens the door to an even greater "yes" dear sister, so don't feel pressured into this decision. If He desires you to be in ministry, He will pave the way for you. That's not to say that it will be easy. The enemy likes to attack those he sees as a threat-- We are not promised easy, just peace. It doesn't sound like you have any. Keep praying and keep in the Word. He will make your path clear.

Blessings.



Deborah_S -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/16/2008 9:19:10 AM)

Hello Everyone:

You have all been so helpful,( even with partial information!).

I am still being patient but in prayer more earnestly, instead of saying "Lord I cast my cares on you" but having no peace.

As for me and my house, we shall serve the Lord in His full wisdom and understanding. His will be done! I will not be afraid to follow my heart and conscience. It is not like I am abandoning everyone and shirking my responsibilities either! I just wont "play church". When I started in ministry this is something I vowed I would never do. I guess things have been going so fast (for me anyway) that I haven't taken the time to catch up. I will though.

Thanks and may God richly bless you all. I am happy to be here.

Deborah[;)]



rcjames -> RE: Why Not Step Down from Ministry? (6/16/2008 1:27:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Deborah_S
...I am still being patient but in prayer more earnestly, instead of saying "Lord I cast my cares on you" but having no peace.

As for me and my house, we shall serve the Lord in His full wisdom and understanding. His will be done! I will not be afraid to follow my heart and conscience. It is not like I am abandoning everyone and shirking my responsibilities either! I just wont "play church". When I started in ministry this is something I vowed I would never do. I guess things have been going so fast (for me anyway) that I haven't taken the time to catch up. I will though.


Deborah,

I will speak honestly with you (as honest as I can be with the information that you have posted)

First the "Lord I cast my cares upon you" is not an option. As a Christian and especially as someone in the ministry this is a necessity. If you are not mature enough at this point to accomplish this; then please grow to that point before taking on a "Ministry". A minister must have thier whole being on ministry and not divided on the cares of this World. Paul spoke to this; even to the point of saying that a married person might have too many cares and a single person might be better at serving the Lord in this capacity.

quote:

Some time ago my husband expressed interest in being the assistant pastor. Recently suddenly our pastor said "promotion time" now you are to become assistant. Simply to start as he says we are running out of time to get trained. There is alot more to this as far as trust issues( mine and my dh's concerns) and unclear expectations (mine and my dh's concerns). We went ahead and my hubby said "let's start over" and aim for turning a new leaf forgetting the past. BUT......


What expectations are you expecting. Is it the moniess you are concerned about; or is it the opportunity to minister you are concerned about.

It takes maturity to discern if the Pastor is sincere. So obedience to the Word in the area of "Be slow to speak" is paramount here.

quote:

I feel in my deepest heart that because our house is not in order (esp in finances) that this is not right. Also my heart is no longer excited about serving at all and because of the hurts etc it is hard to trust. Also, there is snobbery and one-upmanship going on in our church that I am discerning BUT I DO and the ones above me dont see it!!!!!


Now that is some red flags delux; "Out of order" means out of the ministry. One should not even consider desiring to become an Elder, minister, or even a Deacon; unless they meet the qualifications laid out in 1Tim 3 and Titus.

And you might as well get used to "Snobbery and one-upmanship" as Jesus was confronted with that as well as Paul and every other minister since.

It has been tormenting me and the morning after we became assistants i had a yucky sense in my spirit. I just dont want to do anything out of FEAR but FAITH. NOt to please man but GodI have no one to talk to and I am looking into counselling hopefully that wont cost a ton of money.

Do not be concerned about money; if it is God's will it shall come to pass. If I was you I would be more concerned that things did not work out as "I" wanted them to. It has yet to be seen if they worked out the way God wanted them to.

I want to learn to back him up and get our house in order even if he doesn't take the reigns yet.

Again if your house is not in order; why in the world are you even considering a ministry.

quote:

I am willing to step out and be wrong. I have done that many times. I have apologised to others when it hurt, when I wasn't wrong and they were, and have looked like a fool for the sake of the truth. I am tired of being double minded and need help. Need to really hear from God!!!


That is really big of you. If you are worng then get on your face and beg God's forgivness for whatever you are doing that is wrong. Get over your double mindedness (that means die to self and seek to serve God). Then listen and he will guide you.

As long as one is our of order, disobedient, arrrogant, etc. God will not lead that one to ministry.

Thanks
RC



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