RE: When to include children in church? (Full Version)

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PrincessDonna -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/9/2008 3:43:41 PM)

quote:

but if my two year old can sit still and watch Elmo for an hour... a twenty minute sermon shouldn't be such a stretch, right?


Is your pastor as entertaining as Elmo? Does he dress up in bright colors and have an "interesting" voice? Does he sing a lot?

I don't mind other parents choosing to keep their kids in service, even though that is not what I choose for my kids. I do think parents need to be careful about expecting their kids to sit perfectly still and absorb anything from a sermon that they can't even understand half the words used.

I was a helper in the 3-5 jr. children's church last week. The lesson was on Moses, when his mother put him in the Nile River and the Egyptian princess found him. What were the kids expected to remember? That God is with us wherever we go. It's not dumbing down to give kids teaching on their level...it's making sure the lesson gets through and building on those simple things as they grow.



LaurainAL -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/9/2008 3:46:43 PM)

quote:

Is your pastor as entertaining as Elmo? Does he dress up in bright colors and have an "interesting" voice? Does he sing a lot?


LOL[:D]! Sometimes my pastor is. Yesterday he levitated to prove a point (not really...but it was a neat visual).

But I am seriously getting a bent picture of Shane using the Elmo voice. Too weird [8|]!



SweetLittleErin -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/9/2008 3:50:16 PM)

Our pastor used to do a "childrens sermon" where the kids sat on the front row and he did a mini-sermon, (an object lesson really) for the kids right before Children's Church (which starts after singing, when the pastor heads to the front to preach). It taught the kids a quick lesson, and taught them to listen to the pastor. The adults enjoyed it too. Not sure why it stopped, it just did, he probably ran out of ideas. But it was neat and fun.



Brandy -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/9/2008 3:55:31 PM)

I have yet to attend a church that had a 20 minute sermon.

I have attended Mass that had 20 minutes of sermon but never any other church denomination.

Southern Baptist was the worst.. I mean lengthiest..



justjennhere -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/9/2008 4:02:04 PM)

Our pastor (my DH) does have a super-special Elmo voice that he uses when he calls home to talk to our daughters. There's absolutely no way that he would use it while preaching, although that would probably keep EVERYONE in the congregation more interested. [:D]

Parents have to make decisions about what's right for their own children. We have a fabulous children's church program at our church, and I certainly don't judge the parents who send their children off after the children's sermon. (Erin, our church does the same thing with that. It's also usually an object lesson. I think the adults love it as much as the kids do!) I'm sorry if my comments made it seem like I do.

By the way, this is a GREAT topic! I've been thinking about this a lot recently...

Edited to add: We're Southern Baptists. Thanks for that little "the worst" comment. [:)]



Brandy -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/9/2008 4:12:03 PM)

You're welcome! [:D] It's a compliment really. My momma still attends a SB church and still, after what - 40 + years of churches, complains of the length. I tell her to get over it and enjoy the a/c time since she's in Mississippi.



SweetLittleErin -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/9/2008 4:25:11 PM)

Our pastor's sermons arent too bad, lengthwise, usually about 30 minutes or so, sometimes a little more.

I dont think parent's sending their kids to childrens church (or nursery) is bad at all, I think its up to each parent.

The one thing we make sure and do at our church is rotate the people who take the kids to childrens church, that way one person isnt missing the sermon every week.



peculiar_lady2 -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/10/2008 6:26:38 AM)

quote:

but if my two year old can sit still and watch Elmo for an hour... a twenty minute sermon shouldn't be such a stretch, right? (And if it is, what is she learning? That what Elmo says is more important than what the word of God taught from the pulpit says?)

the difference is Elmo is talking on her level, the preacher isn't.

quote:

I think my hesitancy has to do with parents who bring tons of toys that distract children from the service. I've seen children close to preteen age who still "must" have things to distract them during church.

there is a huge difference between a toddler and a pre-teen...and there are many years there that you are skipping that are years of stepping stones which lead to a more mature young person who CAN sit through a sermon and listen to it and get something out of it. Just because it is appropriate for a pre-teen to do that doesn't mean a toddler should start off doing that just so they don't have to change strategies before hitting the more mature pre-teen age.

I also don't think that having something in their hands makes kids automatically zone out...for some it makes them tune in more to what is being said.



Annie64 -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/13/2008 1:55:57 AM)

Even though I chose to send my kids to children's church--actually, I took them to children's church, because more often than not when my kids were young I was the children's church teacher--sometimes, especially for Sunday evening service, it wasn't an option. Many parents in our congregation opted to stay home on Sunday nights, but I wanted to teach my kids that church attendance is important, whether or not there are programs for them. So they were always there with me, usually with pencil and paper to keep them busy. Then one Sunday night I had a brain wave. I told them I'd give each of them a quarter when we got home if they could tell me, on the way home in the car, something the preacher said. For a while, that worked great. And it made sure that I listened so I would know if what they said was really in the sermon. It broke down after a while, though, because I didn't consistently remember to make sure I had quarters on Sunday nights, so we tried to keep a tally of how much I owed them, and it fell apart. I still think it was a good idea. It was my fault it stopped working, not the kids'.



pbaribeault -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/13/2008 11:23:33 AM)

Is your pastor a cute red puppet that speaks to children in ways they understand about topics that interest them? Does he conduct focus groups to increase his effectiveness in retaining children's attention? Elmo is not more important, but it is better designed to captivate an audience of that age. Clearly, a pastor is multi-age targeted. (At best! Many are exclusively adult focused.)

Although I do think that random distractions during sermon time can go too far, as you describe.



TammyIsBlessed -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/13/2008 11:35:31 PM)

At 9:00 we have Sunday School for ages 15 months on up! There is a staffed nursery for the babies if parents wish to use it. I usually end up feeding Jacob during SS.

We have 2 church services, so the 1st service actually runs at 9:00 concurrent with SS. Some parents with young children attend the 1st service while their children are in SS and leave after that. The 2nd service is at 10:30.

At 10:30 we attend church together as a family (the 2nd service). There is a staffed nursery for the babies if parents wish to use it. After approx 30 to 35 mins of singing, the kids (Ages 15 months up to Grade 3) are dismissed to Kidz Church during a song (to minimize disruption). We have approx 500 people attending this service.

Ages 15 months to the end of age 2 is pretty much babysitting. I'm in charge of this room and it's staffed by the parents of the kids in this age group as well as teen helpers who love getting down on the floor and playing with the toddlers.

Ages 3 through Kindergarten are together, and Gr 1 - 3 are together, each with their own lesson/program.

We love it! It's the best of both worlds, IMO. We're together as a family for worship. Then the kids leave so we can concentrate on the sermon.

With a few of our kids personalities, there's no way they would sit quietly through a 1/2 hr sermon at this age! I'm very thankful for the programs provided for them. Once they hit Gr 4 (or sooner if they want to), they will be in the entire service with us. (except for the occasional times they'll be allowed to help out in the toddler room)



manda59 -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/14/2008 7:14:29 AM)

We've always been to churches where it's taken for granted that the whole family comes to the first 30-45 minutes of the service. After that, it's announced that children, teens and special needs adults can now go out to their groups if they want to, and those who remain have a quieter more reflective time of open worship, then the sermon (and communion if it's the 1st or 3rd Sunday). I like it this way because the children get used to being in church, but not beyond their attention span.

So my two were always in the first part of the service up till they were 4 or 5, then chose if they wanted to go to their group or stay with us. Wherever we've been, there has been a creche, but I've never used it (bar one time with my ds, and never again). From age 14, it's usual for teens to stay through the whole service (the oldest children's group is for 11-14s), and that is what my two have done. My dd started staying for the whole service from when she was 13, as that was what she wanted.



TammyIsBlessed -> RE: When to include children in church? (6/14/2008 11:58:37 AM)

I use the nursery mostly for when Jacob's sleeping. He sleeps better and longer in one of the crib rooms than he would if I kept him in the service. When he's awake, he's with us!



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