Retiring from this forum........ (Full Version)

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godsway -> Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 9:18:27 PM)

This is the last time I will be on this forum ever! I don't have any more faith left in me. I am tired and can't take anymore of asking for prayers. It's as if God has turned a deaf ear to me. All my prayers have come back void. This is absolutely ridiculous. I just keep getting kicked in the teeth over and over. I'm not asking to get rich in my job. I was only asking God for a steady flow of income. I only get paid when I sell a house and that is probably once every two-three months. I feel like perhaps I have been asking God for too much. Meanwhile all these agents in the same line of work as me, just continue to get blessed. I call them to follow up with them and they are so rude and obnoxious. They are working with the banks on all these "bank owned properties" and every agent I talk to has anywhere between 8-10 houses in escrow at one time. I feel like God won't even give me a morsel. Every time I call a bank to ask if I could be on their waitlist to sell some of these properties, they don't even give me the time of day. I keep convincing myself that my God is bigger than this and that He is on His way. It's been almost three years of wasted time for me. I just want my happiness that's all. Earlier today I told my husand that I wished it had been me that was killed in that car accident that we witnessed last year. I'm tired of working so hard and not being compensated for all my work. Is this it? This is what life is all about? Suffering and begging and pleading for a blessing. I thought God's love was unconditional? I just don't have anymore to give. Today once again the last of the people that I was working with have cancelled on me. I am starting to believe that maybe somebody put a curse on me. Everything I put my hands on fails! Very seldomly does anything come to full fruition. I am 44 yrs old and am seriously worried about our future. What kind of financial security do we have if I continue to work and not get paid? Today I put $70 of gas in my car and I don't even know when I'm going to get paid again? This is hell to me. I just want to get in my car and never come back. Most of the time I think of death that way I don't have to worry anymore. My children get out of school for the summer beginning June 20th. Their daycare called me today and said they are full and have no more spaces available and for me to look for other arrangements for my children. You know what this means? I am going to be stuck at home with my two little ones for the whole summer. How am I supposed to work? Does God even care? I can't figure out life on my own. I really need Him and I feel like He has abandoned me. Please don't give me any scripture to try and help me. I've heard it all!



BJinWA -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 9:39:50 PM)

i promise no scripture.

i have been following your posts. i'm somewhat of a lurker.

godsway, i wish i were near you to give you a big hug. i know you feel like giving up, frankly, i have been there myself.

someone gave me some advice once.....smile like you mean it. start with that.

also, please see your medical provider. you may be clinically depressed. i recognize the symptoms because i was there once. medication was necessary and, believe me, may have saved my life.

please don't leave. there are many people out in cyberspace who care about you. you don't need to post, but you may find encouragement here. i know this site has blessed me.

pm me if you need to.



Keabird -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 9:47:43 PM)

Hi Godsway,

Please don't leave the forums. God HAS heard your prayers. I don't know why He hasn't answered the way you want Him to - perhaps He has something else in mind.

Sometimes also I believe God wants us to stop repeating ourselves and just TRUST Him. God IS bigger than your situation. He DOES have a plan - His Word says so, and He does not lie.

Father God, I ask Your Holy Spirit to rest upon Godsway. I pray that the peace of God will descend upon her and fill her entire being in such a way she has never known before. I ask You to help her to be still and know that You are God. I ask You Lord to bring things to her mind that will help her situation, or things that You are going to do for her.

I pray for encouragement for her, as she sees that it is You who makes things happen, not us. I ask You to open doors for finances and to give her wisdom about the finances she has and will have. Please bless her marriage and help her and her husband to work together with You. If there be anything that is hindering their prayers Lord, I ask You to shine Your light upon it and help them address it.

I pray in Jesus Name. I ask You to renew her and refresh her in the Holy Spirit, Lord. Amen.



CherishedbyGod -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 9:52:04 PM)

(((godsway)))

You are not alone in your struggles[:(]



ladyingrace1979 -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 10:25:30 PM)

First, if this sounds harsh it isn't my intent. I have also felt the way you do. But the conclusion I have come to is that God doesn't owe me a thing, not even the breath I breath. He created me, He is the sovereign of the universe, He is God. You seem to be very angry with God because He hasn't done what you want Him to. You don't want to hear from God because He just might tell you no. I know you don't want to hear scripture but think about reading the story of Job. God took everything from Job, except his life. God let Job rail on about it, but then God challenged Job. Basically God said to Job, who are you to blame God. Until I surrendered my right to try to dictate to God I had no peace. My circumstances are still the same as they were 4 years ago. My husband and I are living on welfare, he battles MS, we have twins with developemental problems and the same issues all of us face. The only thing that has changed is I am free and I am at peace. I know what it means to trust God, because I trust who God is not who I want Him to be.



Cloak -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 10:31:35 PM)

godsway~

Sometimes it is hard to understand God's will in our life and what He's doing in our life. Please don't give up no matter what and don't leave these forums.

As humans, we are always trying to figure out God and decipher Him, when the truth is we should Not do that simply because God is God and we are only a very small portion beside Him.

Please don't lose heart, rather Take heart and hang in there, things will get better in time!



pstrdebi -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 10:50:44 PM)

Father...

My heart breaks... and I weep in Your presence for this dear one.

Father... Father... Father.

She needs You... meet her right now Lord.

Be her refuge... hide her Lord, in the shadow of Your wing.

Father... hold her.

Amen.



pureevil -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 11:25:06 PM)

I'm new here and I have no doubt that because of the username I've chosen there will be plenty who will automatically discount anything I have to say, but that's ok. God listens and that's all that matters.

For your situation Godsway perhaps God's way isn't your way. Perhaps he doesn't want you in that job and is making it hard (impossible?) to be there any longer. Did you consider that he has bigger and better things for you down the line?

Don't worry about your future, worry about serving God and he will provide for you as he sees fit. I guarantee you'll never have less than what you need if you just trust in the Lord



pstrdebi -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/5/2008 11:26:19 PM)

Dear one...

I am so sorry for what you are going through... and I wish I knew what to tell you. All I could do was cry while I read your post to my husband. Why? Because I have been going through basically the same thing... I have the same questions. God has been so silent... and I just don't know why. We pray and pray... and we wait and wait for His answers... yet He is still so silent.

But I do know this. He has answered before... and He WILL answer again. "God is not a man that He should lie..." and He promises us that He WILL provide.

Sweetheart... I know this also. God does not take us through anything that He knows we can't handle. God gives us HIS strength according to OUR strength. God knows how much trial you yourself can withstand... how much strength YOU have, and He won't allow you to be consumed... even when it feels like you will be. He gives us HIS strength to lean on knowing that we are strong enough to endure.

Why does He give us the trials? To strengthen us, to strengthen our faith, our trust. He wants to use you for something mighty... not just selling houses. He has a greater plan for you, or you wouldn't be going through the Refiners Fire.

I know you feel weak. I know you are sick of it all... I am too. But, I would rather be counted as an overcomer (the ones God is looking for)... than counted as a wimp. Killing myself is wimping out. Throwing in the towel is wimping out. Saying forget this whole prayer thing... is wimping out.

So keep praying... I will pray with you. Keep running the race... I will run with you. Keep persevering... and I will be right here cheering you on. Together we WILL make it to the finish line. God has promised!

I will continue to pray for you...
Much love and sincere concern...
Pastor Debi

"Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you WILL complete it until the day of Jesus Christ." Phil 1:6 (sorry [:)]... I'm a pastor!)



barbi -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 4:34:29 AM)

praying in agreement with the others

and please don't leave. you are a valued member here and we covet your prayers.

We need you



sparkleingsnow -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 9:09:06 AM)

godsway, I don't know if you will come back and read this or not, but I hope you do. I am going to be blunt, but understand that it comes out of love. First, let me reflect back to you some of your last two posts.

quote:

How can I not be rewarded for all my hard work? I have asked God this over and over? If I am a child of God, why do I have to beg and plead for blessings? I just want my happiness that's all. All I think about is financial security and how I can obtain it?I'm tired of working so hard and not being compensated for all my work. Is this it? This is what life is all about? Suffering and begging and pleading for a blessing. I thought God's love was unconditional? I just want my happiness that's all.


You said that all you think about and all you want is financial security and your happyness. God wants to be first in your life. The very most important thing. #1.

God's love is unconditional. That doesn't mean that He will give us material security on this earth. Sometimes He does, but if He doesn't it doesn't mean that He doesn't love us. He is going to do what is best for us, and that may not what we want. But we know that He knows best. Here is an example:
God makes you a great success in your line of work. You become so financially secure and busy enjoying life that you forget to take time to thank Him. After a while you don't even need Him because after all your so great at your job, you can take care of yourself and all that you need/want. And in the end you grow farther and farther away from Him and what He wants for your life.
Now is that really what is best for you? Sure, in the end you had a great life. Full of fun. But what reward do you have after this life? It's going to last a very long time.

The bottom line is, He didn't put us here for our pleasure. He put us here for His. Lots of saints have had a very hard life. Like John the Baptist. Where was His pleasure? In serving the Lord. That is were we get His peace and His joy. When we're in His will, not our own. And his tresures are in heaven, where he will never loose them. Every thing we have here on earth we have to give up one day.

You've posted lots of prayer request for your job to do better, or if He don't want you in this job to show you. Well, maybe He has, but you won't accept His answer unless it's the answer you want. Maybe He has a better plan for you. One thing is for sure, He wants to be first in our lifes. When we put Him there, He will take care of the rest. Even if it's not the way we had wanted it. It will still be best, and we will be happier, and more at peace. I know because I've lived it.

I'm praying for you, but not for you to do well in you job. but that you will put Him first, and for His will for your life.



peaceofGod -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 9:15:23 AM)

Father,

Please help godsway according to your love and wisdom. I ask this and thank you for all that you will do in the name of Jesus Christ. Amen.



love4theLord -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 10:27:46 AM)

Godsway, please don't leave the forum. Trust me, I know how you feel and what you are going through. I do!! I felt like I had gotten into such a deep hole that I could not dig myself out, but once I came here and started really trying, I noticed 2 months went by and things finally started to change slowly after all these years. It is all in GOD's timing not ours. Maybe he just needs to know you trust him and he is waiting.

This is the enemy putting all this in your head, the feelings, the anger, the doubt.Do not let the enemy win this, he would be oh so happy to know that he won this battle, FIGHT BACK..Things
will change for you, I promise. It took me a while, but I am finally getting there. I just had to make a complete change, I said one night to the Lord, I give up and I can not take it anymore, please, I surrender everything to you and I am done worrying, 2 days later he started answering prayers. I just had to completely focus on the Lord, read my bible everyday, and get more involved in church and just drown myself so that I couldn't leave any space for satan to get in. He has been attacking me for so long that I didn't even realize it. Then when I started to really focus, he came out even harder. I fought back as painful as it was....

So, please my friend do not stop fighting back, I hate to see satan win anything in this, when God is so much more powerful, loving, compassionate. Please do not give up, just keep praying and surrender everything to the Lord and he will answer. Just in his timing, maybe he has something really big planned for you after all this...

LORD, PLEASE HEAR OUR PRAYERS FOR GODSWAY, PLEASE HELP HELP HELP. DO NOT LET HER BE TAKEN BY THE ENEMY, KEEP HIS LIES AWAY FROM GODSWAY...

I pray this in jesus name, amen
kc



sparkleingsnow -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 10:48:30 AM)

godsway, I don't want you to leave the forums. I hope you will stay.

Father, I lift up godsway to You for all that You know is best for her. Thank You for loveing her so. May Your will be done in her life, and may she be a blessing to others. Bless her Father. In Jesus name. Amen



Kat_D -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 11:54:02 AM)

I know you said no Scripture, but please humor me for a moment. I have been praying for you and thought of you first thing this morning when I received this devotion. I believe I would be remiss if I were not to share it with you...here is a portion of it:

"And some of the scribes were sitting there and reasoning in their hearts, "Why does this Man speak blasphemies like this? Who can forgive sins but God alone?" But immediately, when Jesus perceived in His spirit that they reasoned thus within themselves, He said to them, "Why do you reason about these things in your hearts?"-Mark 2:6-8

The scribes had been sitting back, watching and listening to everything that Jesus was doing for people, from preaching and teaching to healing and forgiving people of their sins. And look at their reaction to these amazing events: “They were reasoning in their hearts.” Now we all have questions that we want answered. But notice these scribes didn't speak out and ask their questions to Jesus openly and honestly; that’s the real difference here. When you have questions about God, go to Him with humility and a teachable heart to listen to Him...

-“Lord, I don’t understand why I am going through this. Please show me why?”
-“Please God, I am asking You humbly to reveal to me why this is happening in my life."
-"Lord, I have questions. Will You please help me understand? I want to know You more.”

You see, the scribes would rather sit piously, reasoning within their hearts, finding any way they could to criticize and find fault. And maybe you struggle with that same bent. Jesus wants to change this in your heart today. He wants you to come to Him with your concerns, your bitterness, your fears, your anger, and your questions. There are probably a lot of things going on inside of you, but you have never been able to just let them go. There are a lot of things you have to say to God that you think about, but you’ve been keeping it inside of you, allowing it to fester within your heart..."

You can read the rest HERE. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Keep seeking Him and whatever you do, don't give up...give it all to Him!

Edited to add...Leave this forum if you must, but just don't leave Jesus!



buckifn -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 12:01:38 PM)

Maybe God's will is for you to be home spending the summer with your children and this is the only way that can happen?

The point is we submit to His will no matter where it leads us. Most of the time it doesn't mean we understand the why's etc. He asks for obedience and surrender. We do it because of love.



TorchHeart -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 2:17:34 PM)

Hey, man. I know don't know you from Adam, but I do know this: You can't give up. Not on God. Not on life. And certainly not on yourself.

My mom once told me that its easy to believe in God when everything is going your way. The real challenge is to believe in him when thing's go to hell for you.

I've been in situations like you. I recently went through some VERY tough financial problems and was afraid that I was going to lose my house, my car, and everything. Thanks to my family and to God's blessing, things turned around for me, but it took prayer and it took time. I don't know why God allowed this to happen to me, but I firmly believe that it will come in handy at some point later in my life.

I believe the same thing for you. For whatever reason, what is happening to you will eventually end and turn out to be for the better. It could very well be God testing you in the fires and purifying you the way one would purify gold.

You have to have faith, though. Please don't give up on God, and by all means, do NOT give up on life in general.

I'll say a prayer for you.



Cloak -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 2:22:08 PM)

(((Godsway))) How are you doing today??? Thinking and praying for you hoping you would GIVE us an update about your state ASA you can!!!

Blessings! [:)]



Yalonda2004 -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/6/2008 8:36:29 PM)

it says in Hebrews 13:5 I will never leave you nor forsake you.
A friend once told me a story about wait. there are two different ways to spell wait,. there is "Wait and there is "Weight" You know how when you are in the gym you lift weights and it is heavy ok. the burdens that you do have on you are heavy but as you go thru it day by day GOD will take that "Weight" off of you. Also by you "Waiting" GOD is goin to supply all your needs. God has not put us here on earth for us to hurt. For we are here for a purpose. don't give up. You are going thru this for a reason. To tell you testimony to someone else when they are going thru what you are going thru right now. its going to be like you looking into a mirror, but hold on don't give up for GOD will not leave you nor forsake you, so why leave HIM? think about it sweetheart. God love you and you do go thru trials and tribulations for a season and at the end you will come out as Gold! God Bless you. and i will keep you in my prayers



conrack50 -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/7/2008 6:03:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Keabird

Hi Godsway,

Please don't leave the forums. God HAS heard your prayers. I don't know why He hasn't answered the way you want Him to - perhaps He has something else in mind.

Sometimes also I believe God wants us to stop repeating ourselves and just TRUST Him. God IS bigger than your situation. He DOES have a plan - His Word says so, and He does not lie.

Father God, I ask Your Holy Spirit to rest upon Godsway. I pray that the peace of God will descend upon her and fill her entire being in such a way she has never known before. I ask You to help her to be still and know that You are God. I ask You Lord to bring things to her mind that will help her situation, or things that You are going to do for her.

I pray for encouragement for her, as she sees that it is You who makes things happen, not us. I ask You to open doors for finances and to give her wisdom about the finances she has and will have. Please bless her marriage and help her and her husband to work together with You. If there be anything that is hindering their prayers Lord, I ask You to shine Your light upon it and help them address it.

I pray in Jesus Name. I ask You to renew her and refresh her in the Holy Spirit, Lord. Amen.



Don't give up Godsway, that's exactly what the devil wants you to do.
I don't hear from the Lord either but I still get up, I still pray and I still go out & try to sell my candles. I've got a convention to go to in late July in Pa. and I was thinking about pulling out but that's what the devil wants and I'm not going to let him get one over on me!
I can't even fill up my car but I always seem to get a little $$ each day for things we need.
There's plenty of us that are blessed by the things you've done here in this forum and it would be a great loss for you not to come here anymore.

I am praying in agreement with Keabird.

Connie Lou



pstrdebi -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/8/2008 12:09:12 AM)

Still praying for you sweetie!

God bless you... He is ready to restore you!!!

Blessings...
Pastor Debi



love4theLord -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/8/2008 2:09:45 AM)

This has really bothered me. I came back again because I wanted you to know I am still praying for you....


Lord, please please heal godsway and don't let them slip away from you, draw them closer to you and show yourself to them tonight, right now. Please Lord, do not let the enemy win in this. Let godsway know that you love them and that you are there with a big plan for them. Things are rough but there is a reason why you do everything you do Lord, show them, let them feel your love and your hand guiding them exactly where you want them to be. Pleaes give them peace and comfort tonight Lord so that they may wake up tomorrow with a changed heart...

Please Lord, hear all these prayers....
amen
kc



conrack50 -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/8/2008 5:56:49 AM)

Godsway,
You are heavy on my mind and I decided to post again.
Please don't do this, it's a mistake that you would leave the forum.
Why Me? is what I think is on your mind. Don't let this weakness cause you to stop. I call it a "button". In other words, the devil uses one button on me, if that won't work, he finds another one to push. The same is happening to you. I am still praying for you and will continue.


Heavenly Father,
Please heal godsway and have her draw closer to you than ever before.
Father, we ask that you show miracles in the life of godsway.
Father, we ask that you give purpose and meaning to the life of godsway.
We ask that she know that everything is a plan that you have just for her.
We know that you will come thru with more than her heart's desires.
We ask these things in Jesus Name, Amen


Connie Lou



Ignited-Faith -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/8/2008 10:48:29 PM)

Godsway,
We are all lifting you up to the Lord!
I feel I must give a Scripture, because normally
for every situation, a verse brings insight and truth.
Today while I was pondering verses... this one I'd like
to share with you.

"Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:
And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting."
Psalm 139:23-24

(And taking care of your Kids is the greatest job I know of!!!)
Hugs and God bless you.



tbrobinson -> RE: Retiring from this forum........ (6/9/2008 1:05:22 PM)

My dearest Godsway,

I do hope that you come back and read some of these posts. I ctan identify with you, lost my job, lost my life savings, came close to losing my freedom. I understand your frustration. And this weekend I did not feel real happy with God or the plan, and I dont feel my prayers are being answered.
My wife's comment last night is you sure are struggling with what God is trying to teach you. When are you going to jump over the fence of trust instead of just talking about it.

The place where we are is where the heavy work gets done of building real strong christians. I hear your frustrations about work, and not getting deals, I am in sales and have the same issues. But we have to hang in there, we have to have hope, and we have to trust that God has a plan for us.

A wise man told me this weekend, what you are going through is like when the Israelites went through the Red Sea. It did not part all the way across in front of them, it parted as they walked through, they had a wall of water in front of them and could not see where they were going. I think it pertains well to the situation.

We have to hang there, we have to continue to pray, we have to continue to trust. Otherwise we are exactly where the enemy wants us, just like the rest of the sheep in the world, lost, no direction, no master, no hope.

I will pray for you, specifically that you find a new lead or customer right now, that comes from such an unexpected place that you will know that our God is Great.

God bless you.



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