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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/9/2008 7:37:47 AM
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ShallbeRebuilt
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quote:
ORIGINAL: okrox
quote:
ORIGINAL: ju-ju
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ORIGINAL: ChoirDJ
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Before joining a few online dating sites, I would have said no. But the truth is, you can tell a lot about a person by their job title.
I totally agree and this is one the points I was trying to make. The type of job a person is willing to take can say a lot about that person's character.
okay, i gotta ask..... 
i'm giggling as i write all this, so keep that in mind as you read on, k?
So what if you met this man while he is still at "the bottom" as a janitor? Would you, based on his title, just mentally strike him off your dating prospects list or pass right by his online dating profile?
(If we were in our 20's, yeah, it would be worth a look. But since I'm in my 40's and he would be, too...no. By this time, he'd have either started climbing up or he's just all talk. so, no.)
On the other hand, what about a man that has an attractive job title, but -- as we hear on the news all time -- they are corrupt or have vices that aren't seen till it's too late?
(That's the risk you take with dating in general. Has nothing to do with careers. You can meet seriously charming psychopaths in Sunday School, good-looking men who stop bathing after marriage, physically affectionate men who later decide they're gay--all kinds of things. Oh well. That's why we date, and don't just choose our spouses from the Spiegel catalog.  )
So, i'd rather be taking care of butterflies or writing poetry and getting $1,000 a poem.....but i'm in a stuffy white-collar job. What about me?
(Good work if you can get it.)[/color]
Okrox;
I was going to reply to Ju-Ju, but what you said almost fills the bill as well as covering my computer screen with coffee when I laughed.
Yeah, like...I'm 48. I have great respect for those who started at the bottom. But if he's starting at the bottom at this late date in life, then there's a problem that may well be a deal breaker. I promise to find out what it is before deciding, though.
A job title is not ALL I judge a man for, if you'll notice in my post I said it affects the attractiveness--not that it was the main criteria. Even on an online dating site, especially on an online dating site where you don't have a lot to go on, all the other parameters have to be considered.
And I did, once, meet a seriously charming psychopath in Sunday School, and fell hard for him...until the FBI picked him up.
I once had a friend whose husband, she discovered after the "I do" really did not bathe except once a week. And he was a construction electrician.
So I don't plan to find some guy with a great job title, grab him and run down to the JP's office and marry him. I'll definitely take time to get to know him first! Lots of time!
besiderself
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/9/2008 8:46:05 AM
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sunluvingirl
Posts: 1867
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Tinkerbell_
I agree with whomever said she just wanted to be a wife and a mother. Years ago I had a goal to be a highly esteemed lawyer with a corner office of a big shot firm. When I was in high school I had decided to join the military, let them put me through school and achieve my goals that way. I had EVERYTHING mapped out for how I would do things and what I needed to do to climb that corporate ladder and be the youngest partner at the firm. However, what's that old saying, Man plans, God laughs? Mmmmhmmm...God laughed all right.
Please, let my lack of education and job title turn you away from me. The only job title I have now that matters is "Mum" and if someone has a problem with that...well...*shrug*
I like that, Tink!
_____________________________
"Take all of my life....
And make something beautiful.
I open my hand, trusting your plan.
Make something beautiful so all will see the work in me...." |
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/9/2008 9:27:55 AM
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Focusing
Posts: 5731
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Also agreeing with Tink ... we never know why someone is in a position until we get to know them.
imho, job titles are nothing more than a part of the elusive and ever changing facade another puts forth in efforts to identify themself. Being happy in life, following after God ... these are things that mean so much more. Just like looks can be deceptive, so can a job title. I find it interesting how many people think that a person's title is important. We need to get past that to the heart of a person.
_____________________________
"Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord."
Hebrews 12:14
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/9/2008 1:37:53 PM
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Prairiehiker
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I think this thread wasn’t asking about whether we are going to fall in love with someone because of his job title. Rather, it was asking us if someone’s job title changes our perception of them, at the very superficial level. Initially, I think it affects most of us. We might be fully convinced that we don’t view someone as less or more attractive once they mention their job title, but I think our physiological reaction won’t lie.
If Brett Favre didn’t play football, would you react differently to him? I think most people would....unless they don’t care for football. Same goes for Bill Gates or Brad Pitt. Again, I’m not saying job title is or isn’t important, but wether we admit it or not, we react to people’s job title because of their status in life.
Also, nowadays, it’s normal for people to change to a new career late in life, so, it’s not inconceivable that you’d meet someone in their 40s or 50s who are just starting out. Perhaps, they’d accomplish everything they can in their old profession, and are now just pursuing their passion. So, I wouldn’t rule out people because of their position in the career ladder. I know that in a few years, I will be starting out again in a different direction because I would be in a position to do so. If that drops my attractiveness level, that’s ok. But at least I’ll be doing what I am passionate about. And passion is more attractive than job title, in my opinion.
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Money in the bank may be nice, but it will never beat sunrise from a sleeping bag in the mountains. " - climbhard511
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/9/2008 1:51:05 PM
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ShallbeRebuilt
Posts: 2010
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
I think this thread wasn’t asking about whether we are going to fall in love with someone because of his job title. Rather, it was asking us if someone’s job title changes our perception of them, at the very superficial level. Initially, I think it affects most of us. We might be fully convinced that we don’t view someone as less or more attractive once they mention their job title, but I think our physiological reaction won’t lie.
If Brett Favre didn’t play football, would you react differently to him? I think most people would....unless they don’t care for football. Same goes for Bill Gates or Brad Pitt. Again, I’m not saying job title is or isn’t important, but wether we admit it or not, we react to people’s job title because of their status in life.
Also, nowadays, it’s normal for people to change to a new career late in life, so, it’s not inconceivable that you’d meet someone in their 40s or 50s who are just starting out. Perhaps, they’d accomplish everything they can in their old profession, and are now just pursuing their passion. So, I wouldn’t rule out people because of their position in the career ladder. I know that in a few years, I will be starting out again in a different direction because I would be in a position to do so. If that drops my attractiveness level, that’s ok. But at least I’ll be doing what I am passionate about. And passion is more attractive than job title, in my opinion.
Just had to emphasize this!!!
besiderself
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/9/2008 2:14:09 PM
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ChoirDJ
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Very insightful comments made on this thread and there's not a lot that could be added. Great posts.
_____________________________
"Sin will take you further than you intended to go, keep you there longer than you intended to stay, and cost you more than you intended to spend." Got it?
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/9/2008 6:13:19 PM
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okrox
Posts: 155
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
I think this thread wasn’t asking about whether we are going to fall in love with someone because of his job title. Rather, it was asking us if someone’s job title changes our perception of them, at the very superficial level. Initially, I think it affects most of us. We might be fully convinced that we don’t view someone as less or more attractive once they mention their job title, but I think our physiological reaction won’t lie.
If Brett Favre didn’t play football, would you react differently to him? I think most people would....unless they don’t care for football. Same goes for Bill Gates or Brad Pitt. Again, I’m not saying job title is or isn’t important, but wether we admit it or not, we react to people’s job title because of their status in life.
Yeah! What she said! LOL.
Also, nowadays, it’s normal for people to change to a new career late in life, so, it’s not inconceivable that you’d meet someone in their 40s or 50s who are just starting out. Perhaps, they’d accomplish everything they can in their old profession, and are now just pursuing their passion. So, I wouldn’t rule out people because of their position in the career ladder. I know that in a few years, I will be starting out again in a different direction because I would be in a position to do so. If that drops my attractiveness level, that’s ok. But at least I’ll be doing what I am passionate about. And passion is more attractive than job title, in my opinion.
Oh, I agree. But I wasn't lumping "starting over" in the same group as "starting out". Big difference. I still hold that a man in his 40's should at least have a little traction in his job by this time, or he'd better have a real, real good story why not.
However, "starting over" can also be a red flag. I went out some with a 50-yr-old man who had a fabulous dream job. He was a global trainer for a humongous corporation. Flew all over the world. However, because this was his fifth career change--not job change, but career change--he made me a little nervous. And, yeah, in the six months or so since I have stopped seeing him, I've found out that he has, once again, trotted off that job for even greener pastures. Some people would call that ambitious, but to me it seemed like some whole other thing entirely.
Is a job title the be-all and end-all? Of course not. But I still hold that your job says a lot about you. My teen-aged kids own and operate their own snow-cone stand. They financed it, paid for it, and manage it all on their own. I think even that says a lot about them. I repeat: It's not all you need to know about a person, but it can be an important clue. And, as I am fundamentally clueless, I'll take all the clues I can get.
Oh--and besiderself--I think you and I get each other. And Whew on that psychopath thing! A near miss to thank your guardian angel for!
And tinkerbell, I think most of us single moms here would be thrilled to call mothering a career. I, too, cherish that job title more than any other. But. Obviously, God wants me working at some other job for the time being, so I may just have to let that one go for now.
< Message edited by okrox -- 7/9/2008 6:31:00 PM >
_____________________________
Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be 'til I die.
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 12:12:20 AM
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Pauley464
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From: Washington, Indiana
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I'm curious, for all of you who believe that job title is important and tells a lot about a person, what if there is no job title? What if the man is in his mid-40's and unemployed? Not retired, not temporarily out of work, not laid-off, but for some reason you don't know of, he doesn't work. What do you think and how does it affect your opinion of that person?
_____________________________
There is nothing so important that it can't be put off until tomorrow.
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 12:17:16 AM
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ShallbeRebuilt
Posts: 2010
Joined: 11/8/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Pauley464
I'm curious, for all of you who believe that job title is important and tells a lot about a person, what if there is no job title? What if the man is in his mid-40's and unemployed? Not retired, not temporarily out of work, not laid-off, but for some reason you don't know of, he doesn't work. What do you think and how does it affect your opinion of that person?
For me, Pauley, all it does is remove one clue, one way of knowing more about him. It doesn't mean I'd immediately click "close match".
besiderself
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 12:38:42 AM
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okrox
Posts: 155
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Pauley464
I'm curious, for all of you who believe that job title is important and tells a lot about a person, what if there is no job title? What if the man is in his mid-40's and unemployed? Not retired, not temporarily out of work, not laid-off, but for some reason you don't know of, he doesn't work. What do you think and how does it affect your opinion of that person?
I'd listen to his story.
But it had better be a good one.
Work is biblical.
_____________________________
Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be 'til I die.
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 12:56:20 AM
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WaitingforBoaz
Posts: 3620
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quote:
ORIGINAL: okrox
quote:
ORIGINAL: Pauley464
I'm curious, for all of you who believe that job title is important and tells a lot about a person, what if there is no job title? What if the man is in his mid-40's and unemployed? Not retired, not temporarily out of work, not laid-off, but for some reason you don't know of, he doesn't work. What do you think and how does it affect your opinion of that person?
I'd listen to his story.
But it had better be a good one.
Work is biblical.
I would think one of three things:
1. Independently wealthy
2. On disability or
3. Lazy
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F = False
E = Evidence
A = Appearing
R = Real
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 5:45:02 AM
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mutinywxgirl
Posts: 13135
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From: west coast of FL
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quote:
ORIGINAL: WaitingforBoaz
quote:
ORIGINAL: okrox
quote:
ORIGINAL: Pauley464
I'm curious, for all of you who believe that job title is important and tells a lot about a person, what if there is no job title? What if the man is in his mid-40's and unemployed? Not retired, not temporarily out of work, not laid-off, but for some reason you don't know of, he doesn't work. What do you think and how does it affect your opinion of that person?
I'd listen to his story.
But it had better be a good one.
Work is biblical.
I would think one of three things:
1. Independently wealthy
2. On disability or
3. Lazy
Pretty much the same thing here - but knowing that there HAD to be a story of some kind - and that might even be more intriguing.
_____________________________
When blood and water hit the ground.
Walls we couldn't move came crashing down.
We were free and made alive.
The day true love died. The day true love died.
Lisa is happy THE ROWDIES ARE BACK!
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 11:31:31 AM
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David_D
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If you asked me what I do, I might say I'm a worship leader. If you asked me how I make a living, I'd say I'm an IT guy. I don't have any particular passion for IT, but I'm good at it and it pays well enough. I would love to be paid to lead worship, but my church is far too small to be able to afford that and I wouldn't leave unless I was very certain God was leading me to.
What might you think of this situation?
_____________________________
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus
O for grace to trust Him more!
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 11:37:16 AM
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ShallbeRebuilt
Posts: 2010
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quote:
ORIGINAL: David_D
If you asked me what I do, I might say I'm a worship leader. If you asked me how I make a living, I'd say I'm an IT guy. I don't have any particular passion for IT, but I'm good at it and it pays well enough. I would love to be paid to lead worship, but my church is far too small to be able to afford that and I wouldn't leave unless I was very certain God was leading me to.
What might you think of this situation?
If you were in my demographic, I'd definitely consider you as a potential.
We don't always get to follow our passions in a way that also meets our responsibilities. To me, seeing that you have found a way to do both, making the sacrifice of working in an area that is not your passion but in which God has gifted you in order to support yourself and your family, yet also pursuing the passion God has inspired in you shows a lot of self discipline and a sense of responsibility.
These qualities are important and attractive to me.
besiderself
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 12:22:52 PM
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okrox
Posts: 155
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quote:
ORIGINAL: besiderself
quote:
ORIGINAL: David_D
If you asked me what I do, I might say I'm a worship leader. If you asked me how I make a living, I'd say I'm an IT guy. I don't have any particular passion for IT, but I'm good at it and it pays well enough. I would love to be paid to lead worship, but my church is far too small to be able to afford that and I wouldn't leave unless I was very certain God was leading me to.
What might you think of this situation?
If you were in my demographic, I'd definitely consider you as a potential.
We don't always get to follow our passions in a way that also meets our responsibilities. To me, seeing that you have found a way to do both, making the sacrifice of working in an area that is not your passion but in which God has gifted you in order to support yourself and your family, yet also pursuing the passion God has inspired in you shows a lot of self discipline and a sense of responsibility.
These qualities are important and attractive to me.
besiderself
What she said!
See? Your job description does tell a lot about you.
_____________________________
Redeeming love has been my theme, and shall be 'til I die.
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/10/2008 3:34:53 PM
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shelby682
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From: Indiana
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What is attractive to me is when a guy truly enjoys his job whatever God has chosen for him and gives it 100%. It shouldnt matter what a persons job "title" is. Jesus was a carpenter!
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/14/2008 3:53:09 PM
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jika
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This reminds me of the rich man and lazarus the beggar or shakespeares, Not all that glitters is gold, " the merchant of Venice".
I would say most of the time a job title affects attractiveness, which should not. There you have it my confession.
Look at the movie stars, dont they all look attractive, how a bout those who clean our streets and parks where we go while on dates all we do think of is how beautiful the gardens look, the list is long.
Oh I almost forgot, how about in Church? The sisters on the worship team may appear more attractive than the sister who may be seated accross, who may even be more spiritual than the other one on the pulpit and dont forget how people can be asked to leave a seat because it is for the minister or a certain person who tithe the more.
As for me I do not care about the titles, God bless those who enjoy them.
_____________________________
God for us
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/14/2008 6:48:48 PM
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Pauley464
Posts: 520
Joined: 7/29/2007
From: Washington, Indiana
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quote:
ORIGINAL: okrox
quote:
ORIGINAL: Pauley464
I'm curious, for all of you who believe that job title is important and tells a lot about a person, what if there is no job title? What if the man is in his mid-40's and unemployed? Not retired, not temporarily out of work, not laid-off, but for some reason you don't know of, he doesn't work. What do you think and how does it affect your opinion of that person?
I'd listen to his story.
But it had better be a good one.
Work is biblical.
Yes, work is Biblical. But who are you that he sould have to justify anything to you?
Judging a persons attractiveness based on their job title seems to be an awefully shallow thing. One of the finest people I've ever met was a road grader operator and one of the most offensive people I've ever met was a nurse in a pediatricians office. Both were lady's by the way.
Job title means nothing
_____________________________
There is nothing so important that it can't be put off until tomorrow.
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/14/2008 7:47:29 PM
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ChoirDJ
Posts: 473
Joined: 6/15/2006
From: So Cal
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I think most people here would agree the a job title is one of many facets in determining whether or not a person is attractive. If we are honest with ourselves, we all have a personal list of "must haves" and "must not haves" when it comes to evaluating a person and there's a lot of overlap. The flip side of the coin is that a job title (or lack thereof) is one of many factors that could effect our own...shall we say...marketability as singles.
Now someone on this forum may put the job title at the top and base their decision solely on whether or not a person is gainfully employed. Someone else's decision might be influenced by whether or not a person has a job but he/she may look at other aspects of the person to determine if that person has potential. Is it always fair? Not necessarily. Does that person have a right to decide how important the job title will be? Absolutely because we can't dictate what should be on someone else's list. We can only dictate what's going to be on our own list.
_____________________________
"Sin will take you further than you intended to go, keep you there longer than you intended to stay, and cost you more than you intended to spend." Got it?
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/14/2008 7:49:25 PM
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ShallbeRebuilt
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Joined: 11/8/2007
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Thank you, ChoirDJ, for that succinct and insightful post.
besiderself
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/15/2008 11:41:02 AM
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caviezelfan
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From: Nashville, TN
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I don't think that a job title should affect attractiveness at all - the outside looks are not what count, but what the person is made of on the inside is what counts, and should be.
So what if a person has only a high school education - does that make him/her any less attractive than a person with a master's degree? Those high school graduates who have never stepped inside the door of a college are not any less intelligent, or weaker in the common sense department, then those college graduates. There are even some who are so highly educated that sometime you have to almost draw out, in crayon, what you are trying to say. Education should not have anything to do with attractiveness, nor should a job title. So what if a construction worker wears a tool belt, and is all dirty and sweaty? At least he is a hard worker, doing all he can to make a decent salary to live on. That doesn't make him any less qualified as a decent person than a stockbroker on Wall Street.
I work in the copy center at our area Staples, and I enjoy my work. That shouldn't make me any less attractive than someone who is an administrative assistant (I used to be one of those, and I grew to hate it), or an executive secretary. My job title should not have anything to do with how I look, or how intelligent I am. What I have on the inside is what I am all about, not what people see on the outside.
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RE: Does a job title affect attractiveness?? - 7/15/2008 1:50:02 PM
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ChoirDJ
Posts: 473
Joined: 6/15/2006
From: So Cal
Status: offline
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As I pointed out earlier cavie...job title, level of education and a host of other things will make you less attractive to some and more attractive to others depending on their personal preferences. There is no person that will be attractive to everyone. All you need to do is be attractive to the one person that you are attracted to.
_____________________________
"Sin will take you further than you intended to go, keep you there longer than you intended to stay, and cost you more than you intended to spend." Got it?
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