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RE: A life to cherish - 8/8/2006 12:06:43 PM
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cherish405
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Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
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Being at church on Sunday was different. I saw people that I haven't seen for a while. Friends who'd moved to other churches and had just come home for a day to visit. Prophetic words for others that made me cry, sensing the truth of what was being spoken to them through our brothers and sisters in Christ.
I did have a problem however with something that was spoken from the pulpit. They were talking about how people just walk straight into depression and should just walk themselves straight back out of it again. Easier said and done. I have to confess, many tears were shed over those comments. It felt like somebody had just put a knife in my heart and just twisted it. I've been depressed since I was a kid because of things that I experienced. I'd really not be depressed, but the reality is that I am. I can't just walk out of it as was talked about. If I could, I would. It certainly would be nice to be able to feel normal again. Whatever that feels like. I talked to John about it. He said that there are some who do walk into depression, but I'm not one of them. Even though I've had countless hours of counselling, I've still got problems. It's not the first time I've heard from the pulpit that basically you should just be able to switch depression off and be happy. John said that he wishes that people would stop generalising about depression in that way and see it from the perspective of the sufferers. John had a little bit of an idea of what depression is like, but I think, living with me, he knows that it's not as simple as it seems and it's not something straight forward. There are different kinds of depression, and there's no simple answers to dealing with it.
Tonight has been our census night. I was delegated to be scribe. We did it when John got home from work tonight.
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/13/2006 10:50:55 AM
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cherish405
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From: The Land Down Under
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Today has been a bittersweet experience for me. I have a friend who has prostate cancer. He has had it for a number of months now and was supposed to have gone home to the Lord about 6 months ago now, according to doctors. This is a friend that I love dearly. I met him, along with his wife and sons when his wife and one of their sons were involved in a car accident. I cooked meals for them for about three years.
Another friend had a surprise 60th birthday party today. Rod was there. I'd seen him at church this morning before the party. He was physically there, but for the second week running, was extremely quiet. Something I'm not used to seeing. The cancer has spread to other parts of his body now, but still, it was like he was physically there, but nothing else. At the party, they had some singing of older style songs. Swing Low Sweet Chariot. The Carnival Is Over by the Seekers. A whole host of others. Some of the songs, I couldn't bear to look at him. It was just a reminder that this friend was going home to be with the Lord soon unless God decides to heal him. He had been singing along with the songs, and there was just a look on his face that he had made his peace with where he was/is going. His wife had been singing along too, until some of the same songs that I found hard began to choke her up too. I know this dear friend will be in a place where there will be no more pain or sickness, but I find it hard to know that I will be losing him until the time when I eventually rejoin him in heaven. Their sons are now in their teens, and I know that they and his wife are struggling. I know that I will have to put aside my own feelings to help minister to them in the time leading up to Rod's departure and after.
I guess there's a part of me that struggles with loving others. Sure, I am capable of loving others and I do. There is a part of me that is afraid however to do so. Over my life, I have lost many people to illness. People I have been close to. Friends to cancer, to other diseases. It never seems to get any easier, even if they are believers and I know that I will see them again some day. At times, I find myself shrinking back, wondering if I can handle the pain yet again. It's not their fault. We live in a fallen world and they do not choose to go through sickness and pain. I don't know what good can come of it, but I guess, as time goes by, I will learn.
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/16/2006 12:17:58 PM
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cherish405
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From: The Land Down Under
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Today I did something that I never thought in a million years that I would do. I went along with Joan, who went to a health club to see about getting some pool time to help with her knees. That's not the unusual bit so far. I thought I might support her by going a few times to keep her company. I know that John wouldn't mind going with her. I know he wouldn't like it if she ended up going by herself. Anyway, they were filling in her membership paperwork, and the next thing I know, I'm asking about membership too! I'm still shocked that I did that. I still can't believe that I signed up. Then, John decided that while Joan and I were using the pool, he could use the gym. The memberships that we've got, we can do any of the different classes, use the pool, sauna, gym, make use of the personal trainers, (we get 3 free sessions), and all the other facilities. We'll probably try and go a few times a week.
I don't like the thought of people seeing me in my bathers. There's a part of me that's interested to see what kind of a programme they'd come up for me in terms of exercise. There's also the part of me that would freak out once they do my measurements etc. Maybe I'll just work in the pool and do the gym bit later on in the piece.
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/19/2006 12:16:43 PM
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cherish405
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From: The Land Down Under
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This past few days have been different. I've known of people who've passed on, like FreddyMark and others. I've heard of friends who've become parents for the first time after a long time of waiting and trying. I know of those who have been told that they are dying unless God heals them of their disease. The circle of life. We're all in the process, the circle of life.
Where are you in that process? I'm not talking about our ages. There are so many circles, cycles to things. Are you in a place where there's lots of hope? In a place of desperation? Struggle? Are you in a place where you feel peace and grace? An unexplainable sense of faith in God? Are you coming out of one of those places and heading towards another place?
The friends who have just given birth to their first little one. They came from a place of despair after they lost their little one during their last pregnancy. From a place of despair and depression to intense happiness and joy.
FreddyMark, despite everything that he went through, his trust was always in the Lord. There was always an expectancy that whatever God did would be for his good. Either way, he would be healed, either in the physical, or ultimately when he went home to be with his Heavenly Daddy. It was so inspiring to see the level of faith he had in God and his tenacity. He never gave up on God, just as God never gives up on us. Maybe he went through a cycle of emotions as he learned of and dealt with his illness. He lived his life and God saw fit to take him home where he would no longer be in pain or have sickness.
God meets us wherever we are at. He knows our hearts, our longings, our circumstances, our pains, everything. Nothing is hidden from Him. Whether in the heights of jubilation, or the depths of depression, our God is watching over us. Wishing to minister to us and abundantly bless us, if only we will let him. Give comfort to those who mourn. Laugh with those who laugh. Will you let Him? Have you asked God to help you through your day? To give you grace to deal with whatever He has for you to deal with today? Remember, He never leaves us alone, and He never gives us more than we can handle, even at the times when we think He does. Ask Him to help you in the area of the cycle of life you are facing. The cycle of emotions. Your circumstances, varied though they may be. He cares for you and He will give you the best that He has for you.
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/19/2006 12:30:55 PM
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cherish405
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Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
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Anybody who's got any comments they'd like to make about my blog can do so in my thread in Personally For You, called "A Place To Cherish".
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/20/2006 12:02:12 PM
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cherish405
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Hi everybody. Didn't get back to the pool today afterall like we were going to. John had another one of his episodes in church this morning, then just before we were going to go, Joan started feeling unwell.
Things have been going through my head tonight and it made me sit down and talk to John and Joan about it. I'm finding that I'm getting out of control again, especially when it comes to my eating. I've been pretty good in comparison to where I have been in the past, but lately I'm finding that I've gone back to feeling like I'm being driven. I've had enough to eat, and yet I still continue. Seems the eating disorder that I have, is really starting to take a hold on me again. I've decided that I'm going to go back to doing the things that I was doing at the weight management class I took last year. Watching what I eat and the times that I eat. With the time that we spend in the pool, and hopefully later on, in the gym, things will start getting my weight back down like it was starting to do before.
I'm also going to have to start journalling my feelings again. I know that stress is a huge trigger with all of this. A friend of ours who turns 60 on Thursday, is dying of cancer, and I know that that is taking a lot of toll on me. He's a really good friend and I know I'll miss him terribly. There's other stressors as well, and I know that I'm a comfort eater. I have to learn to replace the behaviour.
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/21/2006 12:08:14 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
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What an interesting day today has been.
John had another heart palpatation/stress attack again this morning. That means that he had one on Friday evening, Sunday morning and today. One of the things that have been stressing him out has been the job that he started working a few weeks back. It's a lot of physical work, and the guy who is his boss has really been pushing him. They really do work their employees HARD! Tonight, Joan and I went with him up to the place where he's been working, and he officially resigned. His doctor told him that he needed to cut back, and after praying about it, felt it was right to do so.
We had a couple of extra women at our craft group this afternoon. That was a God appointment, I think. There were 3 women walking around the neighbourhood, looking at the different gardens, and all the flowers in them. John had told me that he'd seen the ladies, and that they were either of Islander or Maori (indigenous New Zealander) descent. I was still in my ratty looking pyjamas, and the last thing I was interested in, was meeting people. Not that they were coming to the door. I felt like the Lord was nudging me to get outside and talk to them. I didn't get a chance to change, (HOW EMBARRASSING!!!) and the next thing I knew, my legs were carrying me out there as fast as they could. They were just starting to look at the neighbour's garden when I got out there. One of the ladies immediately said hi and came back to ask if I lived at this house. She was interested in getting some cuttings for her garden. It turns out that she lived 3 hours drive south from where I did in New Zealand. Her 2 friends were a lot more quiet. That was ok though. She asked what I did, and I told her that I was having a craft group that afternoon, and she asked if that was an invitation. So I invited her and her 2 friends. One of her friends couldn't come as she had other commitments, but the invitation stood for the other 2. I wasn't sure whether they'd actually show up, but sure enough, in they came. It was so interesting seeing what God was doing. Neither are Christians, and one of them kept commenting to the other that what was going on that afternoon was so different. Joan and one of the ladies her was there (who are great friends), were harrassing each other jokingly and one of the ladies who'd come along today said that whatever the two of them had, she wanted some of it. LOL! I felt like saying that it was God's spirit and they could have it then and there if they'd wanted it! The other said that she knew that today wasn't an accident. The other non Christian woman in the group (a third one in our group who is a regular), said that it was meant to be. Interesting interactions coming from non Christians. The one who said that it wasn't an accident that we met, blessed us all as she was leaving. I'm wondering whether there has previously been some seed sowed into her. Maybe we are to water it. I don't know, but it's exciting.
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RE: A life to cherish - 8/27/2006 11:23:23 AM
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cherish405
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Joined: 4/11/2005
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I've had a pretty quiet weekend. John, Joan and I were going to go to the gym yesterday, but Joan really was feeling exhausted after the craft fair we went to on Friday. We then hoped that we would go this afternoon, after church and the meeting we had there. Somebody couldn't find the key to the elevator, and Joan had to climb the stairs. Not a good idea. Hopefully tomorrow.
Managed to get a couple of things for Christmas gifts and got a few things done.
Next Sunday is Father's Day here in Australia. I'm going to be getting John some more plants for the garden. He loves gardening. I bought him some more bearded irises when we were at the craft fair the other day. Those went into the garden yesterday. We're going to go out for a meal, but it will probably not be on the Sunday as the eateries tend to get too busy.
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/2/2006 10:37:52 PM
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cherish405
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Dads. Whether we've known our dads or not, we've all had one, or at least one. I have a biological dad, who went to be with the Lord six years ago. God has also blessed me with a spiritual dad in John. Then of course, we have our Heavenly Dad.
Today is Father's Day here. I'd like to honour my dads.
I never really got on with my biological dad, especially as I was growing. We were way too much alike and clashed a lot. It really hurt when my dad forgot I existed in the end, due to his alzheimers, but that wasn't his fault. Without my biological dad, I wouldn't have been here. Thanks Dad.
John has really built into me over the years that I've known him. He's said some hard things and pained over them as there have been times when I haven't taken it well. He's had to do some hard things for my own good that really hasn't pleased him. He's been there for me, and shown me more of what the dad would have been like that God wanted for me. Obviously, we're not biologically related, but with our mannerisms, sense of humour and some of our characteristics, if you didn't know better, you'd think we were related. Thanks John.
Last, but certainly not least, is our Heavenly Daddy. You've been through a lot with me since before I was born. You've done things too that I haven't understood, and maybe never will until the other side of this life. You've given me the ultimate gift. Life and that of your Son. You've been there when I've laughed and when I've cried. Through it all. Thankyou for all that you've done. Help me to love and trust you more and to point more people to you. May I become more like you every day.
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/5/2006 10:01:15 AM
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cherish405
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From: The Land Down Under
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Yesterday we had our craft afternoon. Just after 2pm, I was still wondering whether the ladies who came last time would arrive. Nearly half an hour after it had started, still no sign of either of them. I had to admit, I was disappointed. I'd been asking the Lord to send them back. A little while later, one of the ladies arrived. I've invited her to come along to church and she's very open to it. She's only arrived in the city about 6 weeks ago. They were living in the country, about 2.5 hours away, and doesn't know her way around yet, or many people here. I told her about the free lunches that they have on Wednesdays at church, and she said that she'd like to serve. She says that she has a strong faith. Not sure what sort of faith yet. Hopefully we'll get to know more as she continues to come along.
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/12/2006 10:58:26 AM
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cherish405
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Don't really have much to say at the moment. Just wanted to say that if you feel led, I've been struggling more than usual with depression lately. All prayer would be really appreciated.
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/14/2006 11:45:47 AM
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cherish405
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I got a phone call tonight from the woman who invited herself to the craft group the other week. She was wondering if I'd like to go to church with her tonight. I was really taken aback. I asked her which church. She got it wrong and thought my church was open tonight. She won't be here this weekend and possibly not next weekend either. She knows she's invited to come along to church though.
She came over tonight to drop some roses over that she was given. They need to go into the ground and they had nowhere to put them in their garden. John's found a spot in the garden where he'd like them to go. Going to invite them over to dinner some time. It's great that she feels comfortable enough to come. She brought her boyfriend with her to to come and meet us.
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/17/2006 10:34:40 AM
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cherish405
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We haven't had a very busy day today.
This morning we were all going to head to church. Joan wasn't feeling all that well, and then before we were about to head out the door, John started having heart palpatations. We didn't make it. On Tuesday he is going to be fitted with a heart monitor for 24 hours to see if there's anything wrong with his heart, causing the problems.
It was a shame that we weren't at church this morning. The lady from New Zealand that has started coming to craft was there at church. When we talked to her on Thursday night, she was saying that they were going to be away. It seems that she dropped him off at work and came along. Seems she really enjoyed it too. She won't be at craft tomorrow as they're going down south for her boyfriend's work for a few days, but I will definitely catch up with her and encourage her.
Joan, a friend of ours and I were supposed to be at a concert tonight. I went online to double check the starting time, only to find that it's been postponed until the 21st of February. Nobody had let us know and it was something that I found first on another website. I thought it was some kind of hoax, but unfortunately not. I guess it just gives us something to look forward to if my friend isn't away in New Zealand at the time. They were planning on being away then.
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RE: A life to cherish - 9/22/2006 10:28:00 PM
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cherish405
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I'm really struggling right now.
I can eat healthily during the day, but night time comes and my appetite craves sugar BIG TIME! I have to figure out what's causing it. I'm writing down what I'm eating, and counting calories. Don't know what gets into me. I try and put it off, but a lot of the time, I still crave. I know the eating disorder is causing problems.
I'm finding that increasingly my body is not handling healthy food. I'm wondering whether it was the right thing afterall to have the gastric band put in a few years back. Before I did, I could eat an apple without it making me sick. I didn't have to worry about whether anything I ate at any given time would react badly with me. I can eat something one time and have a really bad reaction the next time, only to be fine the time after. It's really wearing.
How do you deal with intense loneliness? Boy, did I suffer from it last night. If it wasn't so late, I would have got Joan and John to pray for me. I know they wouldn't have minded, but I didn't want to bother them. Loneliness is a big problem with me anyway, but it's really bad at the moment.
I know depression is really sinking in with me too. I'm going back to the times when getting out of bed is hard and I don't want to get out of the house. Don't worry. I'm still going to church and occasionally going out to do things. It's just hard.
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/1/2006 12:16:49 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
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From: The Land Down Under
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The last couple of days have been really interesting. Friday afternoon, I was sitting out in the backyard, minding my own business, when I felt God putting something on my heart. Anybody who knows me well, knows that I'm a mercy person. Compassion is a major spiritual gifting of mine.
John has been doing some voluntary work for a man who is involved in ministry in a lot of different areas. Sometimes John goes and helps B to do some counselling, other times ministry of different kinds. B is also involved with an organisation that is a half way house for women in really bad situations. These women have been involved with the law, many have been abused, many have drug problems. The age group is basically 18-25 years old. This is a last resort place before the women could be put in jail and the key thrown away. There is a high conversion rate there for women giving their lives to Jesus. Their self esteem is almost non existant. They don't have many friends, other than the other women who are living at the 'house'.
Friday afternoon, it was laid on my heart to put together Christmas hampers/Christmas care packages for these ladies. They don't have very much in terms of personal possessions. I talked to John and Joan about it, and prayed about it, and we feel that it's right. It's a long weekend here, so on Tuesday, the superintendant will get a phone call and John and I will go and visit her. We don't know yet whether any organisations already do something like this for this organisation. If they don't, then I need to find out what they provide, whether there are any foods etc that will trigger bad behaviours. (Sometimes sugar can cause problems in that area). I just want to be able to see what can be done. It could be up to 40 individual packages/hampers needed.
It has been consuming me, thoughts of what could be done. Wondering about ideas of things that could be given. I've started up a thread in the community lounge called Christmas care packages where people can give ideas, and thankyou to those who already have.
This morning, I got to church, and the pastor was talking about servanthood and reaching out to people as a form of evangelism. How we should get better at serving. I felt like God was confirming to me what I should be doing. I knew when the preaching started, that I would be up the front for ministry, and sure enough...LOL! There was one of the men who came to see me after I got back to my seat and he said that he felt that God was pointing me out to him. He asked Him why and he told me that he felt God telling him that it was right that I was getting ministry. He felt that if I hadn't gone up for ministry, he was to tell me that I was meant to be up there. He told me that he felt God saying that He loves me and that He knows what's been on my heart. It just seemed to confirm itself to me and I think that's how God was trying to encourage me.
I'll let you know how the meeting goes.
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/3/2006 12:02:13 PM
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cherish405
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From: The Land Down Under
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John called the superintendant this morning and got a positive response about the hampers/care packages. They'll take whatever we want to put in there.
There will be 30 women that will be receiving gifts this Christmas at this organisation. This afternoon I went to one of the local shopping centres/malls that we go to and started looking for ideas of things that could go into the packages. One store, after we told them what we were doing, gave a few sample packs of things like face masks (cleansing types). It was all they had left. We've already bought some shower gel, soaps, a little bit of jewellery, candles and body and nail creams. Still have a long way to go, but at least it's a start. Going to head up there again tomorrow, so hopefully we'll be able to find some more things to add to what we already have.
John and Joan are interested in looking at things to that can go into the packages. I thought it was funny. I went looking in one of the stores and found what was best in there. I walked out and couldn't find where he'd gone. He was still in the store, looking at another area, seeing if he could find anything else to go in the packages. He and Joan are both saying that they want to be involved in the whole thing.
I'm going to write some scriptures and put them into the packages as well. Just to encourage them and show them that they really are of great worth, even though they may not feel like it.
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/9/2006 6:05:35 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
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From: The Land Down Under
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Some of the cards have been made. I've still got a couple of dozen to do. The cards that I've made so far have come up looking really good. I'm pleased with them. I just have to put some appropriate scriptures on the inside. A friend of mine is going to help me to type some onto the computer. I don't know how to do the margins etc, so that will be really helpful.
Joan went to the doctor last week, and she has faxed through the paperwork for Joan to get a knee replacement. She's in a lot of pain now, and nothing more can be done to improve things from the physiotherapist.
I go to the opthamologist tomorrow morning, my time. Hopefully I'll get some answers about the double vision and wandering eye problem that I've got.
Had some blood tests done this morning. I go to see my doctor next week. He won't be happy as my blood sugar levels are a LOT higher than they should be. I've been eating a lot more than usual, as the eating disorder has kicked in again, BIG time.
Was feeling really low after I saw him last time. I have to talk to the doctor about that. When I started feeling that the Lord was wanting me to do the Christmas baskets, it was like I was hyper or manic. I'm not bipolar or anything, but it felt really weird! I'm on the way back down again, but I'm being careful. I've told both John and Joan so that they are also aware.
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/10/2006 11:40:36 AM
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cherish405
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I went to the opthamologist this morning. The news was not as good as I had hoped. The good thing is that the surgery was successful and things have healed really well. I told him about the double vision, blurryness and the other problems that I've been having and he told me that there's nothing that can be done about it. My eyes haven't been able to focus together because of my previous eye problems, you know, before the surgery. The surgery was a success, but now I don't have the mental wherewithall to be able to focus with both eyes at the same time. That means more double vision. He hopes it will improve some, but it's not looking the best. My eyesight has worsened since the surgery.
I don't know what to do about a second opinion. John was in there with me and he said I could do it for my own peace of mind, but for any other reason, he didn't see the point. The opthamologist was pretty definite, even after John got pretty forthright with him.
Seems unless God does something to change things, or we get the little bit of improvement we're hoping for, this is how it's going to be.
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/16/2006 8:35:14 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
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I've got a doctors appointment on Thursday, so I'm going to see if I can get a referral to see another opthamologist.
In other news, I've signed up to be in the Christmas choir again this year. They advertised it at church on Sunday morning. Singing is definitely something that I love to do, so I'm going to give that a go.
There's a cardmarking morning in a couple of Saturdays, so I'm going to go along and do that too. Should be fun. Joan and I were going to go last year and neither of us were well enough to go. I'm going to invite the woman who came to craft group to come along with us, the one from New Zealand. It should be a good way for her to meet more people, if she comes.
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/19/2006 12:09:02 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: offline
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The last couple of days have been hectic. I finally managed to get myself off to see a dentist. She sent me off to get some xrays of my jaws. She didn't think it was TMJ, and neither did the radiographer. I went to the dentist to get the results. Don't think they quite knew what to make of the situation considering I'm still having a lot of pain. He got the top dentist in to take a look, and after poking and prodding, I think it was safe to say, he thinks I have TMJ. I have to go back and have a mouth splint made to help my jaws. Need to get some general work done on my teeth on Monday afternoon, and possibly more xrays taken.
This afternoon, the doctor gave me the referral for the second opinion on my eyes. Need to make any appointment for that. Had an unexpected diagnosis for the way my moods have been later. He's going to keep watch out just in case things start going haywire again. Hopefully they won't though.
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*** Gone crazy. Back soon. ***
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/26/2006 10:41:37 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: offline
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Had a quiet day today, but things are starting to gear up a bit now.
I went to the dentist today to start some of the work that needs to be done on my teeth. Nothing major at this stage, but it still feels like my teeth are rattling.
Saturday afternoon there is a cardmaking group meeting at church. Joan and I are going and I have invited T, one of the New Zealand women who came along to my craft group a while back. I got a call from her today and she is going to come along. She can't come back to Monday craft group as she has just got a new job, and starts on Monday.
This week I signed up in a couple of places to get some snail mail pals. I've managed to get 12 so far. More than I was expecting, but it will certainly give me something to do. They are from the US, UK, France and Turkey.
I signed up a couple of weeks ago to be in the Christmas choir this year. I pick up my part tape this weekend and rehearsals start on the 6th of November. I'm glad that it's more than the usual 3 weeks that it normally is for rehearsals. Something invariably goes wrong with people not being able to come for some reason and it's just good to have the extra time in case there are problems.
The Christmas baskets are coming along. I'm going to be getting a few more things for them this week. I still need to get the cards finished, but that shouldn't take long hopefully. Then I just need to get the scripture inserts put into them, and they will be ready. Still got baking and cooking to do for the baskets, but that will be done a lot closer to Christmas.
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*** Gone crazy. Back soon. ***
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RE: A life to cherish - 10/28/2006 12:08:16 PM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: offline
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Went to the cardmaking class today by myself. Joan hasn't been well the last couple of days. She'd been feeling better and was going to come, but then started feeling dizzy before we were due to leave. The friend who was supposed to come, called to say that she was running late and would meet me at church. I got there and got our things. She didn't show. Don't know what happened to her. I have to admit that I was disappointed. I don't know what happened to her.
I found it really hard at the cardmaking class. I take a bit longer to get the hang of things sometimes and the speed in doing the things we made was pretty brisk. Ok if you're used to doing things like that, but I'm not. I do a different style of card than we made. Not having T there, and no Joan as well, was pretty disappointing. It wouldn't have been so bad, except the few people that were around me, knew each other well, and had plenty of experience in cardmaking etc, and were talking amongst themselves and barely said a word to me, other than to ask me to pass something. I knew a few people there, but they were sitting well away from me, at other tables. I have to admit, by the time I came home, I was so close to tears that I could feel them welling up. My low self esteem jumped in and made me ask if I'm really ok, or if there's something there that they saw in me that I don't.
Neighours are having a REALLY loud party at the moment. It's nearly midnight and the music seems to be getting louder. I hope they turn it down really soon, or better yet, off. Bailey's been getting upset for most of the day as he can hear kids and cars and all sorts of noises.
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*** Gone crazy. Back soon. ***
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RE: A life to cherish - 11/1/2006 10:13:47 AM
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cherish405
Posts: 32380
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: The Land Down Under
Status: offline
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T came over on Sunday morning before church to appologise for not making it to the cardmaking class. She would have been there, but got a phone call from her daughter who lives about 3 hours south of our city, having problems. She had to make an unexpected trip down there to sort it out.
John went to the cardiologist on Tuesday. He has tachycardia. Apparently in his case it's not life threatening, but it is firmly in the nuisance category. He has been given meds to experiment with to see if they can either shorten the duration of his episodes or completely stop them.
Went shopping today and did a lot of errands. Got some more things for the Christmas baskets.
I can't believe next month is Christmas. I can't believe that 2 months today will be 2007! Things seem to be going so fast now. I have so many things to do before Christmas. I'm going to have to write some lists so that I can get myself organised.
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*** Gone crazy. Back soon. ***
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